You are absolutely right!! Ma-Thi..pff...they made my life miserable...SIL is really BEIMAAN!! steals my things...has one of the 3 keys of my closet....but I keep my mouth shut...coz my husband will make a big issue of it...and I will be the one who is wrong!! I told him (when we married last year) that I was missing a ring. She was the one who hold that ring for the last time when were at the parlour for Walima make-up. I said he shouldn't say anything to anyone. Coz I didn't wanted to make "Hungama". but he did. Whenever I call her she says miserable things to me. Mostly I keep my mouth shut. But she calls her mom right away to cry and say things that I haven't said. I've tried to explain my husband about this. But he dont'want to believe it. Even when we were together (my husband and I) she said stupid things to me. He heard everything. I didn't said anything to her. But she made a very big issue!! Her mom asked me why I hated her so much..But i didn't do anything...My husband also said that..But they were angry at him and said him: Tum sirf apni begum ko sambhalo...u can't do anything for us.... Pfff...
I've started to ignore EVERYTHING!!! I never made issue of anything!! They did!! But I kept thinking about all the things that made my life miserable. Coz also my husband started to blame me for things I never did....pfff...But I ignore everything...I'm deaf..blind...and can't speak!!!
Iksa - Rule number 1 - DO NOT SAY BAD STUFF ABOUT HIS FAMILY REGULARLY. Just keep quiet and put up with everything they throw at u for a while. Then, when you do say something, your husband will sit up and pay attention to it bcos its an unusual thing u say.
But also, I urge you to see things positively. Perhaps you all started off on the wrong foot, and bcos of bad experiences, now you see the negative in all that they do. Ignore stuff that bothers u, and watch out for positive things in their speech and actions.
Also, PLEASE START BEHAVING FRIENDLY TOWARDS YOUR IN-LAWS - they may not know what has come over u, and may well be cautious of u and think that u r up to something, but after u continue behaving nice to them (despite what they say!) they should realise that u r not bad and return the sentiment.
Also, when your MIL see's that u r a good person, after some time she should stop being so judgemental. Don't complain about any of them to eachother, just model yourself into a peaceful person and I hope they should change their behaviour in response.