What is so wrong with being a housewife?

[Sara516]

Re: What is so wrong with being a housewife?

!!!

[BarbieCue]

lol our mod jee is bored.

[Afshi]

Re: What is so wrong with being a housewife?

i'm desperate to by a housewife - im tired of working.

[Decent_6Chora]

i'm desperate to by a housewife - im tired of working.

"desperate to be a housewife" is OK, just done be a desperate housewife :)

[MIAinVA]

Re: What is so wrong with being a housewife?

I would rather play and do fun educational activities with my daughter than clean. But I blame my desi upbringing for the cleanliness phobia.

And frankly, I liked working.... its just the wake-up-early morning part I hate. Why can't I go to work at 10 a.m. :(

[pkgrl000]

has anyone noticed that the only sensible and mature response in this ENTIRE thread came from a guy?

i always thought that my friends and I were a bit extra competitive and generally in comparing our colleges, degrees, jobs, weddings because we were brought up in this community of really competitive aunties who compared houses, kapray, necklaces, and niharis. It seems that whether you are just a bunch of housewives or a bunch of working women...essentially we are all just to each other. we'll never appreciate a woman who's a bit different from us or who doesn't have to work as hard as us. The MOST we can do is completely ignore the topic at hand and start complaining about who we WISH we could be housewives (cuz its soo easy) or how we wish we could find a job in this tough economy (at least its more interesting) but we'll never appreciate a woman who's doing something different. Where's the working woman in this thread who said, you know i actually LIKE working and even though we dont need the money i choose to work BUT i really do appreciate housewives and i believe they work just as hard as I do if not more. And why do housewives feel victimized anyway? just get over it...accept the fact that a houswife's life is generally a LITTLE bit more relaxed than the working individual because you don't really have a boss. although there is a lot of work no one can fire you if you dont do the laundry for 3 days straight or take an hour long lunch instead of a 30 minute lunch. and you kno what...thats fine! no need to feel guilty cuz your job is a bit easier and under-appreciated. its like being Vice president...no one really knows what the heck you do in your everyday life or what the actual job is and therefore ppl think its easy...but everyone knows that they can't really replace you or even run for your office in real life cuz its probably more important than the job of everyone else under the president. right.

[NaMaan]

Re: What is so wrong with being a housewife?

[note]Please refrain from using inappropriate language. Thanks [/note]

[Mirch]

@PyariCgudia

…spice growing?

→

Married people need to spice up their life more than unmarried ones.

[PyariCgudia]

Re: What is so wrong with being a housewife?

With terragon and basil?

[MixedBeauty]

Re: What is so wrong with being a housewife?

I've always thought since i was younger i wanted to get married and be a housewife. And if i wanna work it would be a hobby doing part time. Or i would do a course if i was really bored. Once im married i dont wanna work, Why would i? Im gonna be a good daughter in law spit out babies and cook loads of food. Im gonna be the favourite DIL. ha ha ha :p

[Nina85]

@Stardust09

well said Decent Chora....but alot of girls these days are putting off marriage simply because they don't want to be a housewife and stay at home.

I think they should realise that they wouldnt have had an education or a good job if it wasnt for their mothers who had to cook and clean for them to ensure they could do their homework/studies! It's like they are insulting their mothers by saying we don't want to be a "housewife".

Im sorry but, I have an education and a good job, and my mother was not a housewife constantly cooking ad cleaning. And to be honest, I think that this is the reson why Im like this, because I saw her workng, making her own money and being independent, and I looked up to her.

[Nina85]

@stoppit

I beg to differ. If she has an interesting and challenging job, she would have things to talk about. And the husband would also be able to talk about his work more openly.

Also, interaction with other people during the day usually gives you something more to talk about with your spouse. And not the "did you know what so and so's husband/SIL/MIL/BIL did?".

Unless of course you are a very interesting person and spend your time at home in intellectual pursuits. Rare :(

Agreed

[PyariCgudia]

@Decent_6Chora

Its really not a freeloader if you do it properly. Once you are into it you realize this. I am not talking about those housewife who wake up at 12Noon to watch Zee TV dramas and their "masssis" do all the house work.

And yet that characterizes the MAJORITY of middle-class/upper-class women in Pakistan. :)

[PyariCgudia]

@diwana

it all depends on individual circumstances. There is nothing wrong for being housewife for a woman.

If the husband makes enough, working for a woman is a luxury...this sanity thing to work is overblown too.

All in all, housewives do better if husband makes enough.

Both working women and housewives do contribute to society in their capacities.

If the role of a house-dweller is so useful, then why do men not take it up, and why do they thrust this responsibility on the fairer sex?

To keep them out of the way in the real world.

Let's be real here.

[Silver_Falcon_Of_Kashmir]

@Decent_6Chora

Right on the money.

Many people think that one can only be a contributer to society (or as NaMmaan said useful member of the society ) ONLY if she goes out and work. IMO women can be as important of a contributer or in fact even more of a contributer as housewife. I bet many of the teenage kids who are behind bars for stabbing this, stealing that would have been better off had theie mom’s choose to stay home and raise them.

Now in some cases, women really does not have a choice but to go out and earn but that does not make housewifes any less important member of a society

:k:

Also, I don’t understand the ‘oh but homemaking is not intellectually challenging or stimulating job" or "oh it’s so god damned easy’" arguments. Perhaps not everyone has same definition of intellectual stimulation. Perhaps not everyone wants to be an 'intellectual"?Frankly speaking, how many careers/jobs are really intellectually stimulating?

Satisfaction and contentment are pretty subjective, and my idea of happiness and fulfillment maybe completely be different from another person’s. That doesn’t give me a right to put them down, nor others to act all snooty.
2) Okay, so homemaking is ‘easy’, what is wrong with wanting to have a simpler and ‘easier’ life?
3) The housewives aren’t freeloading, a husband is supposed to provide for his wife, regardless of whether she has her own money or not. Also, why is spending money okay or acceptable only if you ‘slave’ at some job, but if you are doing your household duties, and your husband is providing for you(which is his duty in the first place anyway) certain type of women think it’s beneath them?

[Miss_Noland]

Re: What is so wrong with being a housewife?

There's nothing wrong with being a housewife. There'a lot you could do at home. People need to drop the "I am better than you" attitude. Do what's needed for the family, if it's more money, then get a job, if it's children, then one parent should stay home to take care of them.

[stoppit]

@Silver_Falcon_Of_Kashmir

:k:

Also, I don’t understand the ‘oh but homemaking is not intellectually challenging or stimulating job" or "oh it’s so god damned easy’" arguments. Perhaps not everyone has same definition of intellectual stimulation. Perhaps not everyone wants to be an 'intellectual"?Frankly speaking, how many careers/jobs are really intellectually stimulating?

There aren’t different definitions of intellectual stimulation, just some (most) people are quite happy not challenging their brains. It makes them cry.

It’s okay though, the world needs more people to do the mundane jobs than the intellectual ones.

[Princess1983]

Re: What is so wrong with being a housewife?

I see nowt wrong with being a housewife-especially if kids are involved as to me the most important job in this world which is worth it's weight in 24 carot gold is being a parent.

Unlike a standard job, where you have fixed hours being a housewife/sahm never really has a clocking off time. It's one of those jobs where the rewards are so unreal that those who have no experience of it may not exactly understand it's value (and I'm one of them).

When we have a family Inshallah I will be working for myself, so will work around my family and try to be a practical housewife. Don't knoe if that's possible but worth a go.

If anyone can share tips with me on how to stay on top of the cleaning I'll be enternally greatful (in between 2 jobs, voluntary work and trying to be a good wife and daughter and studying too).

[diwana]

If the role of a house-dweller is so useful, then why do men not take it up, and why do they thrust this responsibility on the fairer sex?

To keep them out of the way in the real world.

Let's be real here.

Becasue men are not 'designed' for this job! And they don't want to be 'freeloader'! :D

fairer sex???????? what is that?

[stoppit]

Re: What is so wrong with being a housewife?

I just wonder how some of you are going to feel after you have spent 20 years devoted to your husband and children. Doesn't matter if you're ill or tired, the food will be cooked, the children's needs will be tended above yours, you hope that they appreciate it all the driving around you do for them. A cook, a cleaner, a nurse, a taxi service.

Then you people wonder why so many mothers in our culture are obsessed with running their kids lives. Why doesn't MIL let go of her darling son??:(

It's payback time for all that effort or vicarious living.

I think being a full time mother is a wonderful thing and something I plan to do when my kids are young (mainly so I can make sure they turn out 'intellectual') but you seriously need to stop deluding yourselves that your children will appreciate all the sacrifices you put in and that it will be some wonderful, rewarding experience.

I'm sure our mothers wouldn't have changed anything in their lives but most will tell you that they woke up one day and were like "hey, where's my life gone?"