What does it mean when the guy u like tells u that he cant be open to u cuz he fears to loose u and that he will only open up once he gets married to u.
His reason for being careful about getting too close to me is cuz he earlier has been involved with someone and that didnt work out so now he thinks he should be very careful with girls.
On one hand, he tells me that girls like me are rare to find and he wants to marry me, but on the other hand his response to my asking: “did u survive 3 days without calling me”, his response was: “well, I dont want to get so close that I cant move on..blah blah…” then he said sorry if sounded rejecting but he didnt want to let go totally of his feelings and later find out that we cant get married.
I am just so mad that I could throw away my phone so he could never call again…and yet I would wait for him to sms or call…
If you are hurt and confused, you have to talk to him about it. Also, it's easy to say you want to marry someone. Has he actually done anything to show you he is serious and not just messing you about?
It means that you are his rebound ticket, and he’s debating weather to peruse (use) you or not but because you are so naive he wants to spare your innocence.
His sister is coming to meet me. We dont live in same countries.
I am the one not letting him involve our families yet as I have some issues going on with my family. He was insisting to send over his parents before I explained him its difficult now. So he will send his sis to meet me instead of involving parents. Also he wants to meet my sister as parents are out picture so far. But my sister doesnt want to meet him before things are cleared up at home.
how can he use me? guys usually use girls for sex and stuff and he never touched me as none of us believe in pre-marital physical relationships.
sheesh i dont think he is using u from anywhere…nobody says that they dont want u too close etc. in such a blunt manner and that too without being asked abt anything spcific unless they r real champoos n inexperienced…so i doubt u need to worry too much abt bieng ‘used’ here…however dont yet give up on the opening-up question…keep being inquisitive as much as u like and dont let him take it for granted, may be he has some real issues that u should know about…
Obviously the guy likes you… then what makes him hesitant? Instead of testing him with trick questions on the phone maybe you should work on his fears. Why isn’t he opening up to you? Guys don’t like to be in vulnerable situations…opening up to someone leads to exposing your insecurities. He is attracted to you but he is not comfortable with you. You need to help him out to get Your answers.
How do I do it Fayz? We just spent last weekend together when he flew over to stay for the weekend. we had such a nice time but he didnt call for 3-4 days when he got home. just a few sms now and then.
yep I agree - just open the matter out and tell him exactly what is on your mind and what both of you can do to figure out how to address the problems.
guys are typically problem-solvers. as long as you tell them what the problem is, it makes things so much easier.
he has his guards up. u have to allow him time to let his guards down on his own time but do talk to him an make him understand that U r not Her- the past- if he keeps it up, his own insecurities might end up making him miss out on sumthni very special.
Maybe the guy is fighting a battle with himself. You will have to be patient. Ask the right questions at the right time and hopefully he will ‘want’ to share his fears with you.
Are you gonna pay by mastercard or visa? I take cash too but only in dollars.
Just be patient. Whats with women really huh!
Next time he calls..tell him you are not comfortable with his response on the phone…ulta puR jao When both of you will be uncomfortable..u will sort things out better err I guess.
meri jaan par parri hai aur aap ko mazak sooj raha hai…
We have had this situation before. He tells me honestly how he feels of having too much contact as that will make us feel more attached by every day, then he appologized cuz he knew it would have hurt me but he said that he had decided that he would not let anyone hurt him by letting her get too close to him.
I just felt so hurt when he said it and told him. He said sorry. but he didnt change his mind about it.
I told him that I was not anyone from his past and I am me so what we share is new and unique. Still, it didnt change his mind.
Now, 2 weeks later we still have same situation. He made me feel hurt again. We were talking on phone last night and I hung up when I felt so hurt. Then we smsed earlier today and he didnt reply my sms when I wrote to him:(
The bottom line is, he is afraid of getting close…and how you fix this problem is what separates you from other much pretty and 420y women out there. :-p
He is 27. I am 25. We live in different countries though not very far from each other; i-e same region. We talk over msn, sms or phone. and meet every 2nd or 3rd week.
Well, I am asking cuz I dont know how to handle this situation. dont want to mess up..
When both of you will be uncomfortable..u will sort things out better err I guess.