“There are far fewer number of men who hate their in-laws compared to women.”
Not true…they just dont have to deal with them as much as women do or are forced to at least.
Dealing less or more has nothing to do with that. We are discussing simply the responsibilities along with rights.
Here, only right is being discussed and that is not a good gesture.
“Because it is beneficial for these women not to make enemeies in family.”
Its nice to make friendships, of course. Agreed.
“Men are much smarter in this way also.”
Its not brains that save you all…its pure luck.
**lol. **
**“Two way between who? In-laws and DIL? Why should there be so much rift?”
**
Two way street between the family and the DIL. There is no rift unless inlaws create one by trying to shove her in a box just because she wants some privacy that she has every right to. Why do men not care about their wives when they get married? And furthermore, WHY do you bother getting married if all you want is a maid? You know you can get more if you simply pay one?
Yes, evil, witch MIL. That’s all we see women these days see everywhere…I still like to know which school they teach this much hostility against MIL?
Like I have said so many times, women are the enemies of each other. Men do not even get close to how women themselves hurt each other. 
“There is no such thing as her ‘right’ to live separately. It is just made up. Mostly by mothers of the girls to use her as a vehicle to satisfy her need of being opposite of boy’s mother. (Samdhan)”
WOW. How completely OFF THE WALL. Are you sure about what you just wrote? I always thought you were mature and am hoping you still are. Maybe you’re having a bad day? She has every right to live separately if she so chose to. If her mother had SO much power and had the ability to create rules in Islam…dont you think her first rule would have been to make her Son in law live with her instead?
I said it is not her right. When we say things like this, we assume she has the right to live separately regardless of situation or family structure. Regardless of what her responsibilitty is. If a woman comes to man’s family house knowingly, then why ask for her ‘right’ after marriage and one child? Is this a nice thing to do?
**
**
“Yes, she should have thought about these rights and options before she got married to man living with his parents.”
She probably thought she could handle it but the issues arise when the same parents who chose the DIL start to feud with her because she wants time with her husband, his money, his attention and they cannot stand it. Thats when problems come up and girls look to moving out. No one gets married with the intention of destroying their marriage lekin sometimes halaat become that way where being separate is more feasible. Its NOT a bad thing. Mama’s boys who dont have the ability to think independently make it look that way, thats all.
Very specific situation. Bad people are in both groups. I am not blaming DIL only. All I am saying is that her attitude has to be to respect elders, men do see it. She will and does get rewatd in the end.
“Why should there be a need for him to say that? Ever thought this?”
Uhhhhhhhhhhhh…its not his place to say this…ever thought of this? Is he Buddha? Does she get to rub his belly and have all of her dreams come true or something that all of a sudden his wish is her command? 
Yes it will be if she does not take care of his parents. I am not saying it is not his or his family’s responsibility.
I am assuming she and her husband are living at his parent’s house.
This kind of attitude is where we see so many divorces for silly reasons.
Youngs do not want to respect elders. Women want their dream life with prince charming, men want women to be barbie doll, or whatever.
**And then they place elders in nursing homes where God knows who looks after them. **
Why can’t she just tke care of her in laws, (and he does for his in laws)?
HOW many men do you know that actually take care of their inlaws? 
That is not the issue. Both should help each other’s parents in any way they can.
If one thing I can get across here which I mentioned above is: Make two families one. Have tolerance, have so much of your own interest in helping elders that no one has to tell what to do.
This attitude of hatred even before marriage in girls, is pathetic.
**Can they not be one big happy family?
When will this stupid family fued end?**
It will end when MEN realize what a WOMAN really is. Not what they’re TOLD she is…what she REALLY is.
You are referring to men who are told wives are just evil evil human beings by their witches mothers. Happy? 
Not that common as we see all around us.
Nope. Not true. DIL and SonIL do take care of in laws very deeply and this is seen in western culture too. Some of the enlighhtened, liberal women from east have wrong attitude however.
No, they dont. They dont want to. Sadly, our mama’s boys think that their wives get disowned by their parents and now are living breathing maids.
Yes** It does happen.**
Sad attitude. Very sad and wrong. One day you will be old. One day you may need someone to help you. Hope you do not ever but do not say that.
Why is that a sad attitude? I want to raise my kids to be responsible. I dont want my son to marry a girl and expect HER to be there for me. I want HIM to be there for me. She has responsibilities towards her own parents.
I think men are becoming lazy. They want to dump all of their work on a woman and say “deal with it”. It is your job to care for your parents…why dont want you want to do it yourself? This makes no sense.
More power to you if you wish like that. Not everyone has that kind of luxury.
Here is where I completely disagree. Her responsibility is for his parents also. Come on that is just plain wrong to say her responsibility is her parents not his.
**There is a reason why men and women do not get married early. Too many fears, home made complicaions, requirements, insecurities. **
Both husband and wife have responsibility to each other parents. Depending on who is more capable and who is more needy.
And who makes that determination? OF COURSE! The husband and his parents decide who is more needy because they had a son and since wife is a woman…she just has to obey. Isnt that what they write on the nikah namah? “You are now property of so-and-so family and you can only leave your susraal when you die”…like a real Bollywood movie? How romantic! I simply cannot wait to be married!
Not sure where are you getting this from?
There are men who respect their wives, even more when they see wife is friendly with his amily members. In laws go shopping together, plan trips together. MIL and DIL joke around.
**DIL takes FIL to shopping or SIL takes both his BIL and his wife to movies.
**
Again why should there be a need to be TOLD?
Hmmm…maybe we have a disconnect here.
Yes we do.
If a woman is told unnecessarily that she better be happy living with her inlaws because thats the way her life is being laid out for her…that is stupid. If you gave her a choice…she would probably try to make things work at home first. People dont like being told what to do and how to live. You dont, so why would a woman? How would you like it if your wife’s parents decided to have you be accountable to THEM for everything you did?