Re: What are your thoughts on polygamous marriage/being a co-wife?
Do women long for second husband while making babies with fist one?
Do women want to have half kids in one house half in another ?
Women tell.
There are loads of diff marriage/relationship arrangements. I had a female professor in college who had 3 ‘partners’ all were aware of the others etc. Arabs commonly have 2 wives… it works for them, it’s a cultural thing. If it isn’t being forced on someone, and they have the option to leave… i don’t see anything wrong with it.
Monogamy in terms of marriage is just a technicality, really. Royal families/the west …for centuries have had many many mistresses. Idk why it’s seen as bad to marry someone else as well… it’s more respectable than being a side hoe.
Re: What are your thoughts on polygamous marriage/being a co-wife?
Partners not equal to spouse.
spouse —home—kids etc etc
Mixing 2 things.
Re: What are your thoughts on polygamous marriage/being a co-wife?
Reasons for polygamy during the prophets time were mainly to help out women who had lost their husbands in war and also gave them better rights than they had before Islam as a co-wife. Abraham pbuh had two wives, so did Solomon pbuh and David pbuh. It was acceptable during those times. It remains halal in case there is ever a need for it but not really needed these days. Anyways its a burden on the man more than anything. If he is unable to treat his wives equally on Judgement Day he will be raised half paralysed and his questioning will be severe. And Allah knows best. What He has made halal cannot be made haram by man or woman.
Re: What are your thoughts on polygamous marriage/being a co-wife?
Thank you! I don’t know why it’s so hard for guys to understand that the times are different! Women no longer need a husband to feed or cloth them, they can sustain themselves. And also the funny thing is that, people who argue for it always forget that right after the 4 wives permission, it is strictly stated that only if you can be just to all of them but won’t be able to!!
Trust me..people..just marry one..you won’t might want to take another wife. I mean bandaa eek hee shadi kamyaabi say challa lay. It’s big thing.
With those who might want to take another, i am not saying..it’s not halal…but if someone decides to take another wife..please do not deceive your partner. Just straight up tell her…you would like to marry another girl.
I think many times people hide that they have someone on side and thaat creates problem.
For example, i met some fella few months ago. He said, he is legally married here in Canada to someone…while he has another wife in Pak. First wife still doesn’t know. Ya well..told him..you aren’t getting far with this. Second wife knows that he is married..like wth!.
What i am saying is, insaaf and wafa bhi koi cheez hoti hai…
Re: What are your thoughts on polygamous marriage/being a co-wife?
its funny, coz those against second marriage never make noise against multiple partners outside of a contract. Never you hear anything against people sleeping around with multiple people without marrying.
Not that I support it but polygyny (one man, several wives) produces more children and naturally forces men to compete for resources and mates, which theoretically produces the “fittest” children. I read once that humans today are the descendants of about 40% (or something like that) of men who have ever lived.
Re: What are your thoughts on polygamous marriage/being a co-wife?
I won’t do it. I’m too jealous/possessive and therefore have poor sharing skills. It’s not even just about my husband (though I can’t stand the thought of having to share him with another woman), but also about my house, my schedule, my things, my life. It just doesn’t sound like a good bargain … If he ever (God forbid) wants another wife, I won’t be sticking around. Much better to cut my losses, and move on even if it does break my heart to do so.
Re: What are your thoughts on polygamous marriage/being a co-wife?
** Men - if you had the chance to take a 2nd wife would you? For what reasons? ****Do you think it would work? **
I can’t see myself doing it. A marriage is hard work as it is. I don’t know if I’d want to do all that x2-4.
What are your thoughts on people who are in polygamous marriages?
I know a handful of people in this type of arrangement. I don’t judge them any differently than I would those who are only married to one person.
Who are the candidates who should approach such a marriage? Is it that common amongst pakistanis?
For men, those who are able and ready to fulfill the rights of all the wives that they take. For women, those who don’t mind being in that type of situation. At least among the people I know, it doesn’t seem like it’s common amongst anybody.
Ooh and how about parents - have any of your fathers taken a 2nd wife, what would your reaction be to it if they did?!
Nope. I can’t really predict how I’d react. I know of others whose father is married to multiple women. My impression is that’s the normal for them.
Re: What are your thoughts on polygamous marriage/being a co-wife?
Polyamory is the new thing now folks
Re: What are your thoughts on polygamous marriage/being a co-wife?
OP, does this tweet help you answer yr quest??
.
.
.
.
.
.
Because I’m a Guy](https://twitter.com/CauseWereGuys)** retweeted**
]Yograj Singh @Immortalizeboy](https://twitter.com/Immortalizeboy) 10m10 minutes ago****
****Guys always believe in polygamy only for a single reason : SEX SEX and SEX. #CauseWereGuys](https://twitter.com/hashtag/CauseWereGuys?src=hash)
Re: What are your thoughts on polygamous marriage/being a co-wife?
**Men - if you had the chance to take a 2nd wife would you? For what reasons? ****Do you think it would work? **
Let alone 2nd, I wouldn’t take a 1st wife. Marriages, and all sorts of romantic relationships are hard work, and I am lazy^infinity. I know it wouldn’t work so why bother.
What are your thoughts on people who are in polygamous marriages?
They are amazing. I salute them for the guts they have.
Who are the candidates who should approach such a marriage? Is it that common amongst pakistanis?
What captain sahab said.
Ooh and how about parents - have any of your fathers taken a 2nd wife, what would your reaction be to it if they did?!
My grand father had two wives. His 2nd marriage was with a middle aged widow who had no one to support her. Legend tells that my 1st dadi had reservations in the beginning but when I saw them, they had become quite sheer o shakar. My father has never shown inclination to follow grand father’s footsteps but if he does so, I personally wouldn’t mind and will not interfere until or unless mother wants me to.
Re: What are your thoughts on polygamous marriage/being a co-wife?
We have an auntie in our community. She was diagnosed with breast cancer and was toldbsje would not survive. She convinced her husband to marry another women while she was still alive. (This is in america so im assuming they only did a nikkah since legally he can’t have two wives) In the end she allhamdulilah survived. Today, he still has both wives and they make it work. Second wife does not have kids so she helps with the first wife’s kids as the first wife is an active Muslim social worker and is very busy. Kudos to them for making it work especially since the first marriage was a love marriage. First auntie was Hindu. They liked each other but uncle said he would only marry a Muslim but did not want her to convert for his sake rather only to convert if she truly believed in the religion. Mashallah, she did and today is the best muslimah I know. She is a role model for most girls in our community. I think its only her faith and seen that made this polygamy marriage work for them as I could never imagine her as jealous or anything. We see the two wives together often and they are like best friends. But for most of us, we would never be able to see our husband’s with another wife (me included).
Re: What are your thoughts on polygamous marriage/being a co-wife?
I have a friend who lives in the ME and will become a second wife soon. Her younger sister is also a second wife and is happy. I used to work with three women that were in such a marital arrangement. Out of the three two seemed content. I don’t judge; if they can handle it then more power to them. Despite there being more izzat in being a second wife than a mistress or “the other woman,” I couldn’t do it. I am the sharing kind, but not of my spouse, 
Re: What are your thoughts on polygamous marriage/being a co-wife?
Are you saying that someone who does not want their husband to have a 2nd wife is ok with their husband having a partner/mistress?
Re: What are your thoughts on polygamous marriage/being a co-wife?
Life hundreds to thousands of years ago was very different. Animalistic tendencies were big and cultures were not as civilized. It’s natural selection and the race of the fittest to survive.
Marriage is just a contract. Do men tend to take more than 1 mate if they can? Yes. It’s their biology.
Some couples find it kinky.
I don’t see how polygamy is much different than polyamory or having affairs. In polygamy everyone is consenting (like in polyamory), and there is simply just a paper contract and things are open not hidden. So I question, rather, why do humans even consentually engage in polyamory? Because some people, including women, think it’s hot. It’s an aphrodesiac to some women, for whatever reason, to know that your man has been with other women and is actively with other women.
The difference with cheating/affairs is that there is no consent of the wife in that case, and she has no knowledge usually of what’s going on. That’s not allowed in Islam.
So taking on multiple mates is allowed, as long as there is 360 degree consent. Otherwise it is called CHEATING. And one could just engage in polyamory, but Islam doesn’t condone that because there is no obligation there on the man to support all the women. In Islam, if you take up a woman, you have responsibilities to her. Which is fair.
So one could argue, that Allah has created us with the natural instinct of taking on more than one mate.
shrugs
Again, some people just think that’s hot, and judging by how many men are talking to multiple women at any one time, it does fit with the theory. Just look at the rishta scene. One guy will be talking to MULTIPLE girls, they just think it’s their frikkin right.
Re: What are your thoughts on polygamous marriage/being a co-wife?
Thanks for all the answers!
Re: What are your thoughts on polygamous marriage/being a co-wife?
Your welcome. Can you please define your user name “PeshawarKameez”?
Re: What are your thoughts on polygamous marriage/being a co-wife?
lol nothing special behind it, I wanted to think up a pakistani name and thought peshawarkameez sounded clever - peshawar + shalwar kameez = peshawarkameez (yeah I’m missing an L :()