hey everyone
i know a lot of girls here are getting married soon or have recently gotten married, which is so great and i hope allah blesses all our marriages ameeeeenn
whats also great is that we can get a lot of feedback from each other right
anyway so my question is where are u from, where is ur prospective spouse from and where will you be having the wedding?
i ask out of curiousity and also because im from us, my husband (we’re nikkahed already) is in us now, but his family is in pak and our families cant agree on where to have the wedding
so would appreciate you all answering and maybe even giving me some advice
mods- i know this isnt fashion or beauty but this is where all the wedding action is
asimaan...my situation was pretty similar to yours....
im from canada....my immediate family is all here, and half my relatives are here, and the other half in pakistan....
my husband is from pakistan, was an only child, and his whole family lives in pakistan.
well, instead of having our wedding here in canada without his parents (i alreadly sponsered him and he had gotten his landed immigrant status)...we (my immediate family and some uncles) all went to pakistan for our wedding...it was nice considering all his family was there and half of mine where there as well...
and for our first anniversary (we were all back in canada by then)....we had a huge party for all my family here....which i suppose made up for the fact that they missed my wedding....
hmmmm...a large grassy park with lots of flowers and those sculptures they make with grass and flowers and stuff, a pretty fountain or two, a huge gazebo or semi transparant tents where u could see the stars shine thru in the later hours, live music....
yea actually it is pretty similar
the only exception is that most of my relatives are here
we've thought about having the wedding in pak but then my relatives will miss it, and if we have it in the us then his parents will miss it
right now were considering wedding in us, valima in pak
what about nikah ceremoney in here (if most of girl's family lives in us) and barat and valima in pak (if most of guy's family in pakitan or vise versa)
^hey its ur day, plan it as u like it
my cousin had her nikkah in texas over christmas break, she had a mehndi, the nikkah, and a reception, and there were 50, 300, and 50 at each event, so do ur own thing
actually sometimes i wish we could have done more for our nikkah, sooo many people couldnt make it :(
me and my future husband are planning to get married in 2 years, we are from cali!! havent decided, he wants to get married on the beach, i want to get married in a hotel =/ lets see what happens! i will probably have 4 functions cant wait!!
my sis got married last year and she got married at a hotel, it was dham fun!
Its so interesting these days i know so many girls getting the nikah done and then having a ruksati like a year later. the new trend is good but kinda weard because they are married can't live together.
Its not easy for people to come from Pakistan to attend wedding but it is easier for people who live abroad to go back and have the wedding. So I guess it depends on family to family how they want it.
actualy it depends upon how much of the family lives where. if the girl has half family here and half there then its ok for the girls side to go to pakistan. but suppose if a girl has her entire family in USA or whereever then it would be different. if u have family in pakistan too, then its not such a bad idea for u to go there. technically i thikn the reception is the girls side thing so they should be at the liberty of hosting it where they prefer and find comfortable.
had the nikah here in the US but will be going to Pak for rukhsati/valima because all of his family is there. Poor guy did not have any family attend the nikah so we kinda owe it to him to do a party in Pak :)
It would mean a lot to me to have my nikkah done here mainly cause our entire family from both sides is here. We have virtually nobody in Pakistan. If I were to marry a man with the opposite situation than mine, I would really want my nikkah here and everything else done in Pakistan (rukhsati, walima, etc.) ... especially if I were moving from Canada to another country.
This whole situation can be extremely stressful. The key is for both sides to compromise and try and be understanding.
I grew up in the US, my husband grew up in the UK, and we had our mehndi and wedding in Karachi :D.
Our mangni was in the US, at my parents' house. My parents also did a reception here after the wedding. When we go the UK, we will do a small Valima-ish reception.
me and my better half are in the same city... infact, just 20min drive away from eachother ..and we gonna have a traditional wedding.. in Banquet Halls
asimaan if both of you are in US then I think you have your Mehndii and Baraat/Rukhsati in US but Waleemah should be held in Pakistan.. this way both sides of the families should be happy
me is from OZ (australia) and hubby was from here too.. my parents are here too, and so are his siblings.. but parents were in middle east... so we all went back to pakistan to have the wedding...
it would have been better here, i mean, cus everyone spent heaps on tickets and travel... BUT considering all our relatives (cousins, aunts, uncles and grandparents) were back in Pakistan...it was just the right place to have it.. yeah, later u do think "oh.. it would have been soo much easier if we had done it in melbourne...." like mum or someone could have gone back and done all the shopping.... LEKIN, it is a lot of fun in pakistan...plus everything is readily available... like flowers, jewerllery... anything u want is available and its a lot lot lot cheaper..
thanks for all the feedbacks girls
and yea it is stressful but inshaallah it'll work out
i've also noticed the trend of couples having the nikkah first and then rukhsati a while later, it IS a little weird b/c ur married and not living together (try explaining it to goras :) ) but i think its a really great solution to the whole no dating issue, you get to know ur partner really well and its all halal :)
well the nikah trend is getting more popular in america because couple can sponser their spouse, so the girl or the guy go to pak or stay here and get their nikah done to file papers and stuff (that's the case with almost everyone here who had their nikah first adn shadi after a year or so)
if i have a choice i would want to have my whole wedding (inculding nikah) in pakistan cuz everyone from my family (uncles, cousins other family) is in pakistan and like sadzz said everything is available there specially good dulhan makeup. i wish i can also have my nikah in pakistan.
