Re: ur feelings towards suhaag raat
I think im a freak cz i wasn't scared.
Re: ur feelings towards suhaag raat
I think im a freak cz i wasn't scared.
...brave girl you are.
Re: ur feelings towards suhaag raat
I think im a freak cz i wasn't scared.
lol that's a good thing!
Re: ur feelings towards suhaag raat
k i have a qs that i am surprised no unmarried girl has asked yet ... our grade 9 sex ed teacher told us how horrible and painful the first experience is for the girl, and then a girl who had done IT used to tell us how she bled a LOT when she did IT. i googled it, and many people say that first time is always painful. i wanted to know just how painful it really is? like i don't even know how long it will last, but is there really a LOT of blood? and how long does it take for the pain to completely subside?
miiccha it is a really horrible and painful kaam.. ufffff
Aap kahbi shadi na karna, itni takleeef hoti hai ke kia bataoo.....
mera ro roona hi nahi kahtam hota tha and i said to my husband ke yeh kaam mai sari umar nahi kar sakti.....
Re: ur feelings towards suhaag raat
^ there are ways around that, you know. did you sit down and discuss this with a doctor to make sure its not a medical issue? otherwise, it sounds like you need to use lubricant like KY or something along those lines to ease your pain. also you have to be mentally relaxed and "in the mood" if you will. it shouldn't be painful or stressful and you definitely shouldn't feel pushed or harassed into it. the main thing is, it shouldn't be a chore that you need to get done and over with to fulfill your marital duties. it should be something you share with your husband that is equally pleasurable for you both.
and also, while the first time can be uncomfortable or even a bit painful, there usually isn't heavy bleeding involved. you might be spotting for a few days but that should be it. if its heavier than that, then you should see a doctor to get checked out because thats not normal.
Re: ur feelings towards suhaag raat
[QUOTE]
miiccha it is a really horrible and painful kaam.. ufffff
Aap kahbi shadi na karna, itni takleeef hoti hai ke kia bataoo.....
mera ro roona hi nahi kahtam hota tha and i said to my husband ke yeh kaam mai sari umar nahi kar sakti.....
[/QUOTE]
I dont know if you are a very newly wed or if you have been at least a few months now but wow I think its really sad that you would describe it as something horrible and painful. I really really suggest for you to see a gyno to make sure everything is ok. You dont have to suffer in silence and think you must put up with so much pain. It could even be psychologically dangerous because if this continues like this it might lead you to feel resentment towards your spouse, that I am going through so much pain just so he can enjoy himself. Yes it can be expected for it to hurt in the beginning, sometimes a bit sometimes a lot, but the pain isnt supposed to last forever and shouldnt have you crying your eyes out, especially after the first week. You should also talk with your husband about being extra gentle with you, giving you enough time to get sufficiently arroused, and discuss with him what you like and what you dont like and how to make it more pleasurable for you both. I hope you will be able to sort it out and enjoy a satisfying healthy intimate relationship with your husband.
Re: ur feelings towards suhaag raat
Guys,
You're offering very kind and considerate advice. I'm fairly certain, though I don't have proof, that Bhabi is just messing around and causing trouble.
Sahar
Re: ur feelings towards suhaag raat
i was reading this thread so i thought i should share my thoughts and observations abt it.i m engaged for 2 years..anyway like other girl i m also scared abt the 1st night i dunnoo wat will gona happen.i just dont want to intimate with my hubby on very first night.i dont know how it will happen.how i will say this to him...
1 more reason to not to intimate wid him because i dont wana spoil my valima (1 might feel uncomfortable , awkward or feel pain oon those parts so.....)
wat i observe is that boys are too curious abt s*x n stuff.if girl ask him no for on very first night sum guys understand sum say no by their own selves as they r tired n etc and sum time this no spoils yr newbrand hubby's mood in other words(suhane sapnoo pe pani phir jata hai us k) and then next day he seems unhappy specially at the valima and girl was also look worried about his hubby moood so yr so called relatives n wellwishers aunties conculde their own selves that the couple is unhappy ........
and if girl share her concerns with his fiance abt the first night.sum boys thinks she is too open n all being a muslim mashriki girl etc..
sum boys dont think this way
sum gets bore with a shy bride and sum shocked by the open brides
Re: ur feelings towards suhaag raat
^ i agree with u.. this happens.. some guys r understanding n some r not..
Re: ur feelings towards suhaag raat
Where is this discussion going?
Re: ur feelings towards suhaag raat
^ please you participate aswell :p
Re: ur feelings towards suhaag raat
^ i agree with u.. this happens.. some guys r understanding n some r not..
Yes, and the ones who aren't are not worth marrying.
Re: ur feelings towards suhaag raat
what i have observed is no matter how much caring n understanding a guy is.. but he doesnt really understands when a girl says NO on first night..
Re: ur feelings towards suhaag raat
now days i m thinking how to avoid s*x on first night.i mean without spoiling his mood.as we cant say bluntly no to a man whom we gona spend our rest of our life.u cant affort to spoil his mood.this no might effect yr whole life so
one can pray for her periods during wedding.so due to periods he wont b able to ve s*x with girl.but i heard sum boys not let her wife even in periods.(animals)
and i guess one can feel uncomfortable and pain during wedding due to periods.cant enjoy dholki mehndi and all hala gulal function properly
so wha i m thikng is ...i wont let him know that i m scared..will show him i m willing to intimate with him(althought i m not)
i,ll ask him rather i,ll show to him that due to the weight of the dupatta and jewllery my neck is hurting.
and due to wedding functions...i m so tired ..couldnt sleep for few days cuz of dholkis ,couisn vice versa
and the lethel excuse which i m thiking is start lil crying with tears or show him that i m very sad(gher aur gher walon se becherne k ghum main)
he might get melow and mercy on me that i m sad and all he shouldnt do this right now ..
and i dont ve the thing on wedding night which i dont want
wat do think girls will these bahanas work or should i seek more
Re: ur feelings towards suhaag raat
funny bahanas. What if he says koi baat nahin ghar waloon ko bhool jao On a serious note just go to sleep before he comes
Re: ur feelings towards suhaag raat
btw one of my married couisn told me that how to make yr first tym easy for u.she said b4 marrige watch sum hollywood movies which has romantic and intimate scens.read erotic stories.aware yr self abt the pleasure and delight of s*x ...instead of pain thing.
so when your hubby came to yrself with s*x intentions.think abt all this suff.it will enhance your s*x desire.u will feel horny and hot.foreplay will help u as well .it will consoled u and reduce your anxiety abt the 1st tym .u will yearn and tingle for S*x.therefore u will get courage because of this and u will yrself want him to ve s*x with u and when he will ve s*x with u..everything will b done it smoothly.u might feel pian or unfomfort but u will bear this pain for upcoming ecstasy.........
Re: ur feelings towards suhaag raat
and otherthing is one of my freind told me sumthing that is for those girls who lost their love cuz of any reason i mean didnt manage to marry with him and they got married with other guy.
she told me when 1st time he start doing fore play n later s*x . she supposed that her love is doing all this .and in this way she got a courage to have s*x for first tym even she calmly bear all the pain and all stuff even sharam haya thing
and now when ever she has inimate with her hubby she thinks about her love and thats help her alot to get intimate with her hubby
i m not sure but may b islamically its a sin thinkingg abt other guy.....
once i talk abt it that it is not right but she said she cant see her hubby having s*x with her.it isvery unpleasant for her. she said she feels like raped and harresed if she think abt his hubby.
Re: ur feelings towards suhaag raat
Islamically? ofcourse it would be wrong but otherwise too how can anyone even think of it being right :halo:.
Re: ur feelings towards suhaag raat
Kjal who is providing u such info? Yikes! Just go with the flow..n stop the planning! carry all precautions with you and that's it! WHY can't u talk to u're husband..abt it? Surprising that u've put up everything on a public forum with alot of details yet u can't talk to u're husband abt it?!
Goodness! Crying? praying for periods...?