I read somewhere that in Pakistan, the etiquette of sending an invitation card to invite people is turning into a status battle. Instead of sending a simple (nice and simple) card, people are now sending invitations in wooden boxes lined with velvety fabric and stuffed with sweets and treats and what not. The tradition is hyping so much so that a single invitation could cost up to 1500 rupees and people often invite 200 guests. Holy, that is like 3 lakhs rupees just on inviting people.
I am sorry girls, but no matter what, I just cannot relate to that. Its not that people did not have money in our days (by that I mean 14 years ago) or brides did not want a special wedding, but spending 1500 rupees per invitation is really extreme. No offense but if you have that kind of money, donate it.
That and I know so many examples where the wedding card wasn't placed in the hand of a certain blah blah person and so the whole family decided not to come.. pleaseeeeeeeeee! I hate that. I don't know why people don't realize that a lot of folks from outside are way too busy to hand deliever wedding invitations to each person according to their work hours and the time they should be home etc etc. It makes everything so so hard and complicated. My immediate family, just tell them over a phone.. they'll show up. It should be like that.
BTW, how do people deliver 200 wooden boxes nowadays. Back then, a guy on a motorcycle could've handled that, now I think you need to hire a delivery service for that.
I read somewhere that in Pakistan, the etiquette of sending an invitation card to invite people is turning into a status battle. Instead of sending a simple (nice and simple) card, people are now sending **invitations in wooden boxes lined with velvety fabric and stuffed with sweets and treats and what not. **The tradition is hyping so much so that a single invitation could cost up to 1500 rupees and people often invite 200 guests. Holy, that is like 3 lakhs rupees just on inviting people.
I am sorry girls, but no matter what, I just cannot relate to that. Its not that people did not have money in our days (by that I mean 14 years ago) or brides did not want a special wedding, but spending 1500 rupees per invitation is really extreme. No offense but if you have that kind of money, donate it.
I got one of those once and you're right.
If you want to spend money on your clothes, I get it. If you want to spend money on your photographer, I get it again. If you want to spend a truckload on your decorations...maybe its stretching it but I will still be okay with it. But spending money on something like an invite that gets no attention or holds any value and usually ends up in a dusty corner of the miscellaneous kitchen drawer...not justifiable in my opinion.
My sister is getting married and the invites this time were simpler than any of ours were. Because the rest of us had super elaborate desi cards and most of them ended up in some corner of the garage, she chose to get simple white embossed cards. They look super elegant and didnt cost an arm and a leg. I would rather put that money towards getting a better looking oufit, more pictures or even a nicer stage set up.
Damn thats an 18 dollar wedding card...I do think wedding cards and the littlest of details are important in a wedding but 18 dollars is way OTT..I'd think maximum I'd spend is 10 and that card has to be the most amazing card in the world...Although you are right about how ppl just put them to a corner...our desi society is very annoying. Get a typical card and they are like "Hai Allah..uska card dekha...kitni buri quality hai" and all that stuff...doesn't matter what ppl say but being a bride you want to have the best you can get..but you should use mind along with that...but do not settle YOU ARE THE BRIDE...MAKE SURE YOU LIKE WHATEVER YOU ARE GETTING :)
Damn thats an 18 dollar wedding card...I do think wedding cards and the littlest of details are important in a wedding but 18 dollars is way OTT..I'd think maximum I'd spend is 10 and that card has to be the most amazing card in the world...Although you are right about how ppl just put them to a corner...our desi s*ociety is very annoying. Get a typical card and **they are like "Hai Allah..uska card dekha...kitni buri quality hai" and all that* stuff...doesn't matter what ppl say but being a bride you want to have the best you can get..but you should use mind along with that...but do not settle YOU ARE THE BRIDE...MAKE SURE YOU LIKE WHATEVER YOU ARE GETTING :)
and that's the whole point isn't it ...
if we know its wrong and find it annoying ... what better way to put an end to that very practice then by simply not giving in to the mind manipulation. All it takes is strength of will ... no?
Damn thats an 18 dollar wedding card...I do think wedding cards and the littlest of details are important in a wedding but 18 dollars is way OTT..I'd think maximum I'd spend is 10 and that card has to be the most amazing card in the world...Although you are right about how ppl just put them to a corner...our desi society is very annoying. Get a typical card and they are like "Hai Allah..uska card dekha...kitni buri quality hai" and all that stuff...doesn't matter what ppl say but being a bride you want to have the best you can get..but you should use mind along with that...but do not settle YOU ARE THE BRIDE...MAKE SURE YOU LIKE WHATEVER YOU ARE GETTING :)
Such people deserve a wedding invitation through text messages only.
hahah I agree TLK...my cousin got married and had to go through that bc she printed the cards on her own..poor girl if she spoke up she wud prob not have any ppl at all at her wedding because her in-laws were all about "kwality" its sad...but unfortunately it exists.
How about putting the money in bride's saving account?
I agree...when my best friend got married...she had a simple wedding and donated the rest of the money to our local masjid. On her wedding cards, she also asked the guests to make a donation to the masjid in her and her husband's names. I thought that was beautiful.
I agree...when my best friend got married...she had a simple wedding and donated the rest of the money to our local masjid. On her wedding cards, she also asked the guests to make a donation to the masjid in her and her husband's names. I thought that was beautiful.
wow, that is beautiful. I know I like to do it for my daughter on her wedding
I read somewhere that in Pakistan, the etiquette of sending an invitation card to invite people is turning into a status battle. Instead of sending a simple (nice and simple) card, people are now sending invitations in wooden boxes lined with velvety fabric and stuffed with sweets and treats and what not. The tradition is hyping so much so that a single invitation could cost up to 1500 rupees and people often invite 200 guests. Holy, that is like 3 lakhs rupees just on inviting people.
I am sorry girls, but no matter what, I just cannot relate to that. Its not that people did not have money in our days (by that I mean 14 years ago) or brides did not want a special wedding, but spending 1500 rupees per invitation is really extreme. No offense but if you have that kind of money, donate it.
I totally agree !! it's totally included in the category known as 'israaf' in Islam. That's too much of an extravagance. Now that am planning my own wedding and going about with shopping and the bookings of the halls etc, I just get a sort of a bee sting feeling in my heart everytime I see the pale, tired faces of my parents, trying their best to give the maximum and most lavish !
What's the point of that ?! 1500 rs per invite? Us ka kya faida?? I recently got an invitation card. It was in a wooden box with carved sculptures and names of the groom and bride :/ It contained Patchi Chocolates and in the centre it contained those expensive parchment rolls consisting of the invite. I mean WTH?! :p
I agree...when my best friend got married...she had a simple wedding and donated the rest of the money to our local masjid. On her wedding cards, she also asked the guests to make a donation to the masjid in her and her husband's names. I thought that was beautiful.
That's great ! I wish everybody could actually have a simple Islamic wedding and not have fingers wagged at them for being stingy or too kanjoos :/
My hubby to be and I have literally been trying to convince everyone on having no mehndi before our shaadi...but in vain. At least my fiance's side has given in. but mine !? am actually ashamed when I say it..but my parents esp my dad says
for the 'baraadri' a small function and dinner should be given in any case. Mehndi or no mehndi. As am the first daughter and people would wag their tongues at anything they would get a chance to pounce on :(
That and I know so many examples where the wedding card wasn't placed in the hand of a certain blah blah person and so the whole family decided not to come.. pleaseeeeeeeeee! I hate that. I don't know why people don't realize that a lot of folks from outside are way too busy to hand deliever wedding invitations to each person according to their work hours and the time they should be home etc etc. It makes everything so so hard and complicated. My immediate family, just tell them over a phone.. they'll show up. It should be like that.
Yup, totally agree on this one. Something similar happened to me and I am still hearing tales after so many years. :(
