i was in similar situation once and i can feel ur pain (but my hubby wasnt abusive or violent)…we were living 2 lives but pretending we were happy…once we had our daughter eveything changed. now i yell at him, ignore him but he only smiles back.
things do change once u have baby. he accepts that our daughter changed our lives.
just pray to Allah, read namaz and make sure he develops some sort of bond with the child…keep him up to date in ur pregency…tell him when baby kicks or moves (over phone) tell him he is missing the moment
tell him that ur baby will ask u things about him/her before birth or as baby or toddler.
its not best to seperate or stay away…tell him he has to be the first one to see the baby
Hopefully things turn out well in urlife.