Re: Very complicated & weird proposal experience..need girls advice
We didn’t consider ourselves single. We became committed to each other and took on the boyfriend/girlfriend label with the intention of getting married to each other. She was officially my girlfriend, I was officially her boyfriend. I understand nothing is official until marriage but some people have a hard time adjusting even after marriage. They have certain habits and mindsets that may have been appropriate when single but inappropriate when in a committed relationship and they have a difficult time adjusting–doesnt magically happen just because a person had a huge ceremony and put their signature on a marriage license–this goes for both men and women. Relationships and marriage are a lot of hard work, and it does require a strong commitment and sacrifice and taking into account partners wishes, likes and dislikes. Some guys and girls have a very difficult time understsnding this concept and putting it into into action because guess what?? It’s NOT easy. This is why divorces are skyrocketing these days because likely one of the partners is selfishly putting their needs above the other partners wishes or needs and not willing to compromise. No one wants a divorce obviously and neither do I want to be a controlling husband or make my wife and myself miserable after marriage. So I only had a discussion with her to see how difficult would it be for her and whether she would even be willing to adjust after marriage in regard to some things that were very intrinsic to her behavior and personality that may cause misunderstandings in the future. Everyone has to adjust a bit once in a committed relationship and especially after marriage–I was always willing to adjust and sacrifice for her, I guess she didn’t feel like she could in those regards. While I am sad that it ended, I’m glad I found that out before marriage rather than waiting until after marriage to discuss these things.