Very complicated & weird proposal experience..need girls advice

[pak2015]

Re: Very complicated & weird proposal experience..need girls advice

@Sady

Agree with StrangeOne. Why did you agree to do with her things that you were uncomfortable about? By agreeing, you left an impression that you were ‘her kind of guy’, shared her ideas, way of living life. I think you knew from day one that she was a different league but played along in the hope of changing her slowly and ultimately control her. But still you were a bit too fast to show her your controlling side so she realised that she was with a wrong guy. You had a problem her socializing with her male classmates. Later in the relationship/marriage, you sure would have had alot many different objections on each one of her habits. Even though you say her male classmates are nothing like you, still it is clear from your post that you were jealous that she was hanging out with them. I guess you became too possessive of her in 9 months. She did not see any future with the ‘new’ (real) person you started showing to her slowly over the period of 9 months and I guess she made a good decision for herself because she saw that you could get worse in future (revealing more of real you who is a different person than her).

I don’t want to control anyone. My mindset is that guys and girls shouldnt act single when in a relationship–it’s just disrespectful to the other partner. We were committed to each other, she was my girlfriend and I was her boyfriend and we were discussing marriage. So it would be okay if my future wife is hanging out with a group of guys all the time who did not even know she was committed (she hadn’t told any of her friends about me yet)? I trusted her and never once questioned her about who she talked to today or who she hung out–guys do this and to me that’s controlling behavior. And I’m pretty sure no wife would like it if her husband was socializing with a group of women all the time and acting single while in a relationship. It’s not about jealousy (a dose of jealousy within limit is completely normal for a relationship) and neither is it about some sick need to control another person, it’s about respecting each other and each others relationship.