Venting/Dissing of spouse and inlaws

[CoughCough]

Re: Venting/Dissing of spouse and inlaws

@Sehrysh

Without it sounding like an excuse, we all know men and women think, perceive and react differently. While they may share the same core values -** not all women consider their ‘venting’ to be back-biting. For many it is reaching out to a support system for sympathy, understanding, advice and yes validation.**

Does that mean that gheebat is excusable, nope not at all. But in some instances it’s not about talking about someone else, rather it’s talking out a situation for perspective and insight.

The thing is - maligning someone when you talk about them versus just describing a situation are different acts. But if someone doesn’t like the way another is presented in the telling of a tale, it comes across as ‘dissing’ them. Kabhi Kabhi haqeeqat bohut talkh hoti hai and we don’t like how we or those we are close to, come across in another’s telling of a situation.

Very weak response(excuse?) sehrysh. Expected more. But lately the sense that was quite prolific amongst some people has vanished.

Consider the portion in bold from your first paragraph.
Why do you feel the need to defend this?
Does it really matter what they consider it? Does their view of what they’re doing change what they are actually doing? If I were to whine at length about how someone is treating and then say “oh but i dont mean to whine”, does it mean I’m not whining?
If your answer is yes, you may disregard the rest of my post as you and I have nothing further to discuss, as you clearly have an innate need to not even try to understand the perspective of another, which in fact also renders your own argument void.

You claim that gheebat is not excusable yet you go on to make an excuse for it. And can we please not pretend its anything more than it really is? Please? Let’s get rid of this false sense of righteousness you ladies seem to metabolise and use as a source of energy that fuels your crazy.
Women will present a problem, analyse the problem and should (heaven forbid) the Life1 tribunal (consisting mainly of bored aunties and feminist crazies with debilitating personalities which makes it impossible for them to have any success in any personal relationship) conclude that it was the man in the situation was at fault, well then all men will be brought to the question.

Ladies if youre having issues with your man please dont insult other men. This group contains your father, me, my father and about half of the population of the world. All the crap you’re going to fling please fling it on your own man.
us
Finally you claim that the cause for these “disses” is when people don’t like how the other presented in the telling of a tale. First of all, this diss isn’t the issue. The issue is when you take the op’s story as fact and proceed to diss someone in the story. What you ladies seldom remember is that all you see is one point of view. Based on that, so much has been insulted. Secondly what you ladies fail to realise fail to do is empathise with all players in the story. Also you guys seem to loath your own culture and religion and blame it at times for the disparity between men and women. This is also very frustrating.

If you need prime examples just look below.

@PyariCgudia

Bella has a good point. You guys wouldn’t tolerate it for a day if you went thru the usual desi susral experience that women go through.

@bella88

make husbands live with their wife’s families in joint family system. make husbands cook, clean, take care of their MIL, FIL. let their FIL,MIl talk down to them, tell them what to wear, what to cook, what to eat, how to live their lives, and constantly tell them how unfit they are for their daughter and how their daughter could have gotten a way better husband. and also, limit how often the son in law can go visit their parents because visiting too often means neglecting their actual responsibility which is their susral/ wife’s parents home .
then lets see who vents and complains.

Ladies!
Since you two ladies seem to focus on stereotypes, allow me to do the same.
If men do that can the women take over the man’s role in such a situation? Work hard all day to make money only to come home and listen to wife whine and moan about the man’s family that he spent all his life with. Come home and hear your wife tell you that your mother is an awful woman and to completely stop supporting your family. Lets move out. Lets leave the family that raised and loved you to fend for itself because your parents want to steal my baby away from me.

Before you judge others maybe you ladies should shut your mouths and imagine what it would be like living with YOU.
Answer: worse than 9/11

What perplexes me most is the staggering levels of hypocrisy that we find on here.
You ladies love engaging in stereotyping and gender profiling.
Why do you engage in this? Do you not understand this is no different from the discrimination that countless have to face around the world for actions they had absolutely no connection with? Example, 9/11. Through some cowardly acts of some “muslims”, other followers of Islam around the world were discriminated against, even to this day.

You women are no different from the people that do this.
Don’t pretend you are. You aren’t. Just as bad.