how should someone deal with this mentality that the uneducated desi people have that boys are better than girls…hence boys are treated like they are gods gifts to the world…and girls are treated like they are at fault for being a girl (something they had no choice over).
I totally hate this mentality…but I myself know so many examples of parents treating the boys superior to the girls…
it doesnt matter if the boy is a total waste of space…it doesnt matter if he drinks/does drugs/womanises/steals/disrespects parents/has no manners/ is a total dumbo…some parents still treat their boys better than girls.
how should a girl in this situation deal with it? if her parents treat the boys so much better and let them do what they want…whereas the poor girl isnt even heard…she has no say in anything…and is restricted from even going out to the shop on her own…they just use her…but dont give anything to her in return…
ive seen so many examples of girls in this situation and they tell me about it…and are so upset about it too…but I just get stuck on what kind of advice i should give them. even some of my friends go through this too…but what can the girl do apart from take this **** and make sure she doesnt treat her own children in the same way? I suppose some see marriage as an escape…but what if shes younger than the marriageble age…lets say in her teens…what should the girl do?
another situation is when the girl is educated but belongs to an UNEDUCATED family…hence her thinking is very different to them…what should the girl do? or even boy in this case?
^Perhaps you r the one who is confding in you is taking staying at home thin as bad treatment. Otherwise i haven't seen Desi treating boys better than girls. I saw my uncles treating their daughters better and were always tough on boys. I love my daughter more than my boys.
I dont think theres much a girl can do about this situation
The only bad treatment I got was not being allowed to go out alone while my brothers did all the time… but come to think of it, home is much safer a place…:halo: especially if you’re in pak
Other than that, my parents always treated us all equally in all walks of life; education, career, any kinda choices… we’re given full authority of how to live our lives…
I totally hate this mentality....but I myself know so many examples of parents treating the boys superior to the girls....
it doesnt matter if the boy is a total waste of space...it doesnt matter if he drinks/does drugs/womanises/steals/disrespects parents/has no manners/ is a total dumbo.....some parents still treat their boys better than girls.
how should a girl in this situation deal with it? if her parents treat the boys so much better and let them do what they want....whereas the poor girl isnt even heard...she has no say in anything....and is restricted from even going out to the shop on her own....they just use her....but dont give anything to her in return.....
ive seen so many examples of girls in this situation and they tell me about it...and are so upset about it too....but I just get stuck on what kind of advice i should give them. even some of my friends go through this too....but what can the girl do apart from take this **** and make sure she doesnt treat her own children in the same way? I suppose some see marriage as an escape....but what if shes younger than the marriageble age...lets say in her teens...what should the girl do?
another situation is when the girl is educated but belongs to an UNEDUCATED family....hence her thinking is very different to them....what should the girl do? or even boy in this case?
Yes, it is something that is very jahil about our society and slowly it will change as women enter the workplace. I personally would prefer a daughter rather than a son. I want to spoil my daughter like crazy!:)
Impulse: I am sorry for the people stuck in that situation. In our family girls are treated like princesses what they rightly deserve. On the birth of my second daughter one friend of my dad said "Oho chalo agli dafa ladka ho ga". Guess what this person was banned from my house.
Even when I was a child, my sister is 1 1/2 year younger than me, she was allowed to punch me or kick me or whatever during playing, I was not allowed to do any of these things fuming (Dad's rule).
I know this family who has a daughter (older) and a son.
When the daughter hits the son they would make her apoligize.
When the son hits the daugher they would tell her it was an accident.
And this is just one example of how they treat their son and daughter differently.
[quote=Impulse]
how should someone deal with this mentality that the uneducated desi people have that boys are better than girls...hence boys are treated like they are gods gifts to the world....and girls are treated like they are at fault for being a girl (something they had no choice over).
I totally hate this mentality]
**You know where it begins, with Mothers all New Moms that have boys are estatic and those who get girls are totally depressed, **
"uf Allah" ab kia hoa ga is ki shaadi karaani parray gii...:( .
**TRUE...:D **
I say go to the root of the problem and educate the Mothers,
**Fathers have NO PROBLEM with DAUGHTERS:biggthumb **
There r sum fathers in the world that r obsessed with having sons but i know its a real woman thing which my husband does find really ironic. I mean how wud these women had felt if their mothers had them aborted simply for the fact that they wud b girls when born. I have said that to ppl in the past and they’re shocked but its true tho. Only from what ive seen, unfortunetly a lot of the time it is a women saying this nonsense. :halo:
Yes, I have heard quite a few hospitals have stopped offering detailed scans to desi people (except for the necessary routine ones of course)
and some hospitals even turn the monitor away from view!!
ive noticed most guys prefer to have girls…especially this generation ones…ive heard this same response from many guys nowadays…that they want girls. i mean ive heard of many first time expecting women, whose husbands have said they want daughters. my fiance prefers girls too and says he wants a girl whose just like me ( )
Although I know that there ARE parents out there who really want boys and not girls I truly beleive that they are pretty few and far between. I know, I know....I have 3 boys and no girls. Sad thing, that. Anyway back to the topic....there is really NO way that parents can treat boys and girls the same way. Sad fact of life, gals. From a parents point of view anyway. I will want my boys to expand their horizons and feel comfortable with independence from earlier ages. If I happen to one day be blessed with a girl, I will have her at home and close to me for as long as I can.
While I am completely FOR education, equal work for equal pay etc....you have to realize that from a parents point of view, having a girl is very different from having a boy. Neither is loved more or less, each is loved in their own way and every bit as much as the other.
)