Re: Tough Decisions in life
and its not just about distribution of assets or noting all etc but what your wishes are, god forbid if someone was in the type of situation as that dude in metallica's video for one..from the movie johnny got a gun..
I mean really i would want them to pull the plug, and people should know what your perspective is on such things.
The husband and I made a will when our kids were younger, but it needs to be updated. We both made living wills the last time I had surgery, because the hospital made the paperwork available. You really need to define what types of lifesaving steps you are comfortable with (feeding tube, ventilator, etc.) because once they are started it can be legally difficult (and emotionally devastating) to turn them off.
Please hire an attorney to draw up your will in order to ensure that it is legally valid.
We had some very emotionally charged discussions about who would hold guardianship of our children. None of our close relatives were really in a position to do so, as we want the kids to remain in the US. We decided to appoint very close friends, and, like Fraudia bhai, appointed a different person to be the trustee (not that they are inheriting much). If you go this route, don't share it with your relatives - it caused a lot of hard feelings all around. However, we really wanted to make sure that we were doing what is best for our children.
We have also made our wishes known about burial, but we have not bought plots yet. One important step I need to take is to put all of our passwords and pin numbers in a safe deposit box or other accessible place, apart from our other records.
Re: Tough Decisions in life
Wills are important. My grandfather left alot of property and business, and it was always his intention to hand over the business to my uncle, and the property to my dad. Unfortunately he passed away, and did not leave behind a will. The property values skyrocketed all of a sudden and my uncle no longer recognized the 'verbal' will, and it caused a lot of stress and headache for both families.
Re: Tough Decisions in life
What a thought-provoking thread, Spock!
I've had 2 friends in the past 3 years who've lost their Dad first, shortly followed by mom. Lots of arguments about what will happen to the younger kids - where will they go, etc. Wills are definitely important.
All you guys have got me thinking - lots I need to do.
Re: Tough Decisions in life
I am young, never really thought about this....I dont have much, i jus live for my family thats it.... if i die now, my family would probably wont bear this loss since i am their elder son...nd my family is like my world to me.....Whatever savings i have will be my little sis after i die or my mom would probably giv them to poors.....and as for donating organs, kidneys never really thought abt it!
I never discussed this issue with my family, simple becoz i find it too emotional nd jus dnt wana think abt it...but i know after my death my family wud giv savings to poors
Re: Tough Decisions in life
In our family, we dont fight over wealth..i dont think my dad hav wrote a will or he ever will...coz he trust us and always say "Mere marne kai baad sab kuch app logoon ka hai" to my mom.....And to be really really honest i, my family, bruv, sis jus dont giv a F abt the wealth...all we care abt is us being together and live happily thats it Money, wealth dnt matter to us.......
You would be shocked and disgusted at how even the most loving families can be torn apart by a division of property or possessions. I personally know two sisters who have not spoken to one another in about 10 years because of a falling out over their mother's favorite gold set. Both claimed that she promised it to them and that they need it to preserve her memory. The eldest has it, but their relationship is ruined.
A few years ago, when my parents downsized, they offered my brother and I a choice of heirlooms. We tried to divide things fairly, but there were a few items that we were both a little put out about. She labelled the items that she kept, so that there would be no questions. My brother and I get along very well, but it's amazing how irrational people can become over great-grandmother's china (I thought it should stay in the female line - his wife wanted it) or even family photos (we scanned and shared, the old framed portraits we gave to my cousin, the family historian).
Re: Tough Decisions in life
my mother passed away last year 2007 and v are three sisters but v got more closer after her death, infact v learned how close v were. i don't know how ppl bcum so mean. although v two are married but our heart sill beats for our younger siblings. at times the husbands get jealous of the bond of love v have..................i can't believe that ppl can sacrifice their relation for the sake of meagre things like gold. v didn't even think of it.
You would be shocked and disgusted at how even the most loving families can be torn apart by a division of property or possessions.
If this post was a reply to my post, than let me tel u one thing....In our family we dont giv a crap about property, money....My moms not interested in it, i dont care abt it either and my sis nd other brother have no interest in it whatsoever.....All we care about is being, united and together...Thats it, money,properties can go to hell!
It is seldom to come across someone who finds it easy to face the end of a life. This is why its natural that we resist preparing for it. When these grave decisions are unplanned for, they have to be made quickly along with immense stress which may cause a lot of unforeseen problems. Do you guys ever think about making such decisions in advance, put them in writing and tell your loved ones where it's located, if needed?
Life is full of unforeseen cicumstances. For somethings that life hits us with we can't prepare ourselves for. For others we can.
I have tried to prepare myself for the worst as my life is full of suprises that hit me like a bolt of lighting. Hehe! I have made a will. Inshallah, it will make things easier for family and relatives - but I sure hope I live a long, healthy life, Inshallah. :)
You would be shocked and disgusted at how even the most loving families can be torn apart by a division of property or possessions. I personally know two sisters who have not spoken to one another in about 10 years because of a falling out over their mother's favorite gold set. Both claimed that she promised it to them and that they need it to preserve her memory. The eldest has it, but their relationship is ruined.
A few years ago, when my parents downsized, they offered my brother and I a choice of heirlooms. We tried to divide things fairly, but there were a few items that we were both a little put out about. She labelled the items that she kept, so that there would be no questions. My brother and I get along very well, but it's amazing how irrational people can become over great-grandmother's china (I thought it should stay in the female line - his wife wanted it) or even family photos (we scanned and shared, the old framed portraits we gave to my cousin, the family historian).
Amana, this is so true! Even the most 'strongest' families get torn apart with disputes over money and property. No offence to anyone btw.
The obsession to acquire it by all means has made some family members/ relatives do some really terrible things to eachother. They won't care if relationships are broken.
Re: Tough Decisions in life
Make a will!
Re: Tough Decisions in life
Anyone seen Michael J Fox's/Kirk Douglus's 'Greedy'? lol
Re: Tough Decisions in life
No. Is it good?
and more
Re: Tough Decisions in life
lol its not just good, its VERY good! I saw it like 15 years ago! p.s. its got the late phil hartman from snl fame too 
heres the trailer
Re: Tough Decisions in life
I keep telling ppl around me what I want and what to do with my things.
I keep telling not to donate any of my organ and yours too.
Wash me yourself. No rona dhona. Sabr and do all my last things themselves in presence of trained person and try to get knowledge about how to do everything.
About my jaidaad I did added the name of person whatever I wanted to give.
I will also record in video my will and keep that in my secret place and leave a message where to find.
I will also write what and how I want and keep it in my secret place.