Ok…now Impulse i appreciate a lot of your views…you have good posts…but i have to say your fiance thing annoyed me…
Let me make something very clear…you dont have a fiance you have a boyfriend…
You may hate the word…but that is what it is…
There are no engagements in Islam so there is no such thing as a fiance…
I remember this hijabi girl at my college…used to piss me right off…would look down at me cos i go out with girls…and would justify her own behaviour by saying she had a fiance…this was a guy she was going out with who she said she intended to get married to…thats a boyfriend…to say anything other than that is nonsense…
Guys are the same…another guy at college was linking a girl…to religious people he had a fiance…and to the rest of the world this was a girl he was sexin…
Im not saying any of you are like that but what i will say is your sugarcoating things by thinking that calling your boyfriend a fiance is any more acceptable than just calling him your boyfriend…
Iknow you girls want to feel holy and religious but saying your engaged is no different from any long term relations that most people have…except maybe the sex…
So please please just admit that you are all like the rest of us…you dont have fiances…you have boyfriends and girlfriends…they are the same thing…
Sorry if iv offended anyone…i just wanted to make a point…
And if your meeting with mehram then i apolgise…if your not then you are no different to the rest us who have our girlfriends and boyfriends…
Re: To those who are engaged...stop sugarcoating things...
desi' girls dont like to use the word "boyfriend" because of the so called image it gives them among the desi/muslim community which is precisely why they use the word "fiance" instead.
Re: To those who are engaged...stop sugarcoating things...
Someone told me that the difference between a friend and a boyfriend/girlfriend is the physical intimacy. Now the definition of a bf/gf may be differnet for everyone so not every girl who says she has a boyfriend may truly be engaging in any of that stuff; however, generally speaking, that is my guess why girls don't like that term. And also, fiance shows to society that you are getting married, whereas boyfriend deosn't imply that.
Re: To those who are engaged…stop sugarcoating things…
Okay this is how i look at it I got tons of friends who are friends… so you call them boy who are friends
The reason we dont like to label them as Boy friends is because western society has this notion boyfriends acting just like your husbands. Living with them, having sex, kissing, hugging blah and blah.
If two people are talking to each other and their intentions are pure and leading towards marriage is there something wrong with it? They don’t even meet alone always with friends etc…But if society wants to put a label of boyfriends so be it
Re: To those who are engaged...stop sugarcoating things...
^But Nia, naughty is correct to some extent, I have seen most desi girls in the west refer to their boy freinds as their fiance's. I mean if you dun like to refer to him as your bf, you can just call him your guy. Why the Fiance label? Most of these engagements are those that parents don't know about.
Re: To those who are engaged...stop sugarcoating things...
What difference does it make anyways? You can call a relationship whatever you want, it still means the same thing. I used to care about what people called us before, now i dont care. No matter wat you call it, I love him and inshallah soon he will be my husband.
Re: To those who are engaged...stop sugarcoating things...
but the thing is Nia...these girls call their bfs their fiances to make themselves look less whorish among the desi community. God knows how the desi community talks.
(btw i dont think they are whorish for being in a relationship...well i guess it depends on what kind of relationship it is.)
Re: To those who are engaged...stop sugarcoating things...
^
All these games are so idiotic. By not calling her 'boyfriend' a 'boyfriend', these women only shoot their freedom and choice in the foot.
Women, don't be shy. Call them 'boyfriends', and feel free to grunt yourself to the proverbial heavens (just not on the tennis court, thank you very much). :D
Re: To those who are engaged...stop sugarcoating things...
ek bat bolo angel eyes....
Its so easy to point fingers at other people but if we honestly sit back and see how much we are worth i think that will do a lot of good to us..
angel eyes Allah wont ask you did you know what nia khan did? It wont work like that you will be questioned for your own imaan and to point fingers at someone else and especially for their izzat.. is simply wrong...
Leave it up to that person whether they call that person their fiance, boyfriend or whatever its their matter... it should not bother you. I do agree its wrong.. but what can you do except getting your own lungs go crazy after screaming.
Re: To those who are engaged...stop sugarcoating things...
nia i agree with you completely. you are right...let people do what they want. honestly i could careless. however i was just giving my observations.
Its so easy to point fingers at other people but if we honestly sit back and see how much we are worth i think that will do a lot of good to us..
angel eyes Allah wont ask you did you know what nia khan did? It wont work like that you will be questioned for your own imaan and to point fingers at someone else and especially for their izzat.. is simply wrong...
Leave it up to that person whether they call that person their fiance, boyfriend or whatever its their matter... it should not bother you. I do agree its wrong.. but what can you do except getting your own lungs go crazy after screaming.
I got tons of friends who are friends… so you call them boy who are friends 
girlie dunyaa walo ko bakne do who cares 