I dont think you understand.
A woman’s first priority is her family. Anyone’s first priority is their family. Inlaws may feel like their attitude or treatment is perfectly fine and as we can see in this thread…all of us have different views on what is acceptable and what is not. A girl’s first thought will be about her husband, child, her parents and then inlaws. Its just a natural thought process that occurs in everyone’s mind. If she feels like separate accomodations are important and her inlaws are so loving, caring and accepting…why all the drama over her moving out? They are so loving and caring, surely they can understand this basic human need of living your life according to your own rules. If they dont, its a great idea to move out because that is imposing behavior. “Alag rehne ki kya zaroorat hai, hum koi usko marte peet te thori hein”
So, they may be offending her and not consider it such. They may be annoying to her and not consider it such. They may be imposing in certain areas of her life and not consider it such. They may be giving unsolicited advice and invading her privacy without knowing or may not consider it such. “Humne koi ziyatti nahin ki hai uske saat”…bas sara din uske moon pe usko taanay dete rehte hein…koi ziyatti nahin ki hai.
If even Islam recognizes this basic human need, who are these people to question that, stop her or even get in her way? No one.
The bahu is not responsible for taking care of her inlaws…she SHOULD do it out of the goodness of her heart and because she cares for them lekin its NOT her responsibility. MIL and FIL have kids of their own (sons and daughters) to do that and if those children do not realize their own responsibiities towards their own parents…that is the sadder part…that they raised their kids to be callous towards their own parents and shove off their job to someone else.
If a woman wants to take care of her own parents in their old age, its great and should be recognized as an example for other girls to follow. Girl or guy…your parents are your responsibility. Sons marrying doesnt mean daughters can relax and do their own thing now because bahu agayi hai…ab sara vo dekhegi. Nope. Usko dekhna chahiye hai, sure. Lekin, uski zimmidari nahin hai.
Its such sick and twisted thinking when you see people labeling a bahu as chalak and hoshiyar if she wants to help her own parents.