this is for the Doctor’s Wife who also posted in one of Shaz’s post… I hope you come across this..
okay I am happy with what I have! but just wondering… is life a piece of cake with all the luxury - if you are a doctor’s wife?
That’s what the perception is for the rest … since families always are more gearing to find a doctor for their daughter.
Would you mind sharing what your life style is as a Dr’s wife!?
LOL.. a thread for me.. I am sure there are other doc's wives around or even docs themselves.
Life is not easy to be honest. Yeah have the money, luxury and all. He is still doing residency but I am sure he earns as much as a simple graduate with years of experience in his/her field does. So with years in his own field, i am sure that my husband will earn a lot more.
So to answer your question, life isn't a piece of cake for me. I do a lot more than a wife with a husband that does only a 9-5 job does. My husband goes away for over 24 hours and I am alone at home, taking care of groceries, bills, cooking, cleaning, going out to see relatives, ALL ON MY OWN each time. I go to his work to give him proper meals when he works long shifts.
When my husband does get time, we do have enough to spend on anything we want. So its good and bad both. As a wife I do take care of all his needs because I know that he has a stressful job and long hours.
Ours was an arranged marriage and with a lot of differences that includes cultural too. I only post when I see if I can adjust to such life, why can't others. I think we all choose our own lifestyles and what we are willing to give up. I love my husband and I understand that if there is any time issues, he is doing his job and providing me with everything I want.
I was aware of this lifestyle before I got married to him. My siblings are all docs and his parents/siblings are docs as well. So no complains :)
Re: To the Doctor’s Wife…just wondering
I come from a family of doctors and married one too, so i was pretty aware of what it’s like being married to someone who is actually married to their job!
It’s stressful at times, and yes there are times when he’ll have to be on call and work ridiculous hours, or travel and work away for a long time, but i can’t have him all to myself… our life is not romanticised fiction, it’s reality :)… and i’m happy knowing that he’s helping another people who need him.
I take care of most of the household duties, bills, groceries etc… but even if he comes home totally drained, he’ll still play with the kids and get them ready for bed, or even pluck up the energy to cook! So he’s very hands on in that respect… he doesn’t disconnect himself.
No marriage is perfect, and i don’t know why, by marrying a doctor, people think you have the perfect rosy life 
. A successful marriage is about the willingness to work at it and commitment, regardless of whom you are married to 
Re: To the Doctor's Wife...just wondering
[QUOTE]
this is for the Doctor's Wife who also posted in one of Shaz's post... I hope you come across this..
okay I am happy with what I have! but just wondering.... is life a piece of cake with all the luxury - if you are a doctor's wife?
That's what the perception is for the rest ... since families always are more gearing to find a doctor for their daughter.
Would you mind sharing what your life style is as a Dr's wife!?
[/QUOTE]
find a daughter for their son ... nt daughtersss :p
Re: To the Doctor's Wife...just wondering
We have alot of friends who are physicians and even though their lifestyle comes with lucrative benefits i can see how stressful it must be for them to take care of all household related things mostly on their own, all the time and have your spouse be married to the job as well as you.
Re: To the Doctor's Wife...just wondering
I think there are many other careers that are just that demanding- corporate executives, lawyers, etc who I have seen in my family and they have insanely long work hours. I always saw my mom having a successful medical career but a very demanding one, my dad has always been more than supportive towards her. I never realized how much it takes to do that until I married one.. even more if you have seen him survive through medical school and the crazy rotations. I remember my bhabi, married to my cousin who's a doctor, told me when I was getting married: Be there for him, he's gonna need you the most, especially during residency. Yeah, the parents are there, so are siblings, but only a wife can understand what he goes through because at the end of the day, he's gonna come to you, and would vent and want all your attention and care.' I think what she said was so sweet, and so true. I feel lucky to have seen my husband through his med school phase and in a few months, the working life. Im sure that if it was something new that hit me after marriage, I would have panicked but Im glad at the way things have transitioned. I got a crude preview of it when he was on his surgery rotation and his day started at 4 am, ended at 11 pm, he would come home half asleep and was surviving on 3 hours of sleep. I can't complain of living a tough life when he is the one going through it all. I feel exhausted as it is working a 9-5 schedule, I can't imagine what it's like to be on calls and working 36 hours at stretch.. all that AND being responsible for so many peoples' lives. This is something so incredibly demanding that you just cannot afford to lose focus or patience. And it touches me to no end that my husband is going through all this so he can provide me and the family a good life. It's a rewarding career, financially and emotionally, because at the end of the day, you know you have made a difference. However, it makes me upset when people assume doctors and their families to have these lavish lifestyles as if money is growing on trees for them. It's really not, what they get paid is in return for years of education and slugging away. They all work hard for it, they don't sit back and get paid. Like I said before, you're responsible for someone's life and health.
Re: To the Doctor's Wife...just wondering
Doctors are not the only people out there with hectic schedules. And doctors are not the only people out there making lucrative incomes - in fact, a lot of doctors, especially those in primary care, are making often times, less than a 6 figure salary...I know people who don't have a college education and in the corporate world, they make about the same as a primary care doc who is taking care of mostly medicaid and medicare patients.
However, it makes me upset when people assume doctors and their families to have these lavish lifestyles as if money is growing on trees for them. It's really not, what they get paid is in return for years of education and slugging away. They all work hard for it, they don't sit back and get paid. Like I said before, you're responsible for someone's life and health.
:( you jumping on me for no reason :( :( :( :(
I was a pre-med student and I ended at that. (However, I finished up with another major). Main Reason to quit: Finance and the years of commitment.
So I know it's difficult. Very difficult.
But at the same time, I also think that guys - MARRIED guys have it easier in this field since they have a wife to take care of their other responsibilities.
He earns enough for a wife to stay at home. I understand he works hard for it but in the end his responsibilities are SHARED. If it's a woman in med field - she STILL HAS to COME HOME and cook, clean, serve, give birth, and all.
So that's why I think when a man is a doctor and his wife manages his other responsibilities then I am sure they have a COMFORTABLE LIFE together.
... The WIFE has a better life - now doesn't she?
So that's why I wanted a doctor's wife's perspective on how it is for her.
:)
Spiral thanks for your response... :) I see we all have to work hard no matter what! :)
Re: To the Doctor's Wife...just wondering
Then the Machinist's wife would have the worst career?
[quote="NJMasti, post:1849, topic:202909"]
:( you jumping on me for no reason :( :( :( :(
I was a pre-med student and I ended at that. (However, I finished up with another major). Main Reason to quit: Finance and the years of commitment.
So I know it's difficult. Very difficult.
But at the same time, I also think that guys - MARRIED guys have it easier in this field since they have a wife to take care of their other responsibilities.
He earns enough for a wife to stay at home. I understand he works hard for it but in the end his responsibilities are SHARED. If it's a woman in med field - she STILL HAS to COME HOME and cook, clean, serve, give birth, and all.
So that's why I think when a man is a doctor and his wife manages his other responsibilities then I am sure they have a COMFORTABLE LIFE together.
... The WIFE has a better life - now doesn't she?
So that's why I wanted a doctor's wife's perspective on how it is for her.
:)
Interesting, so what is the experience of being married to a female doctor? Gentlemen?
they have loose doorknobs on their bedroom doors.
LMAO!!!
Re: To the Doctor’s Wife…just wondering
ooh i wasn’t talking about you, i meant general people who say this.. and not just about doctors, but also a lawyer or anyone else making alot of money. 
As for the male perspective, I have seen my dad be very supportive of my mother’s career. And I adore the way aahmed (guppy here, wife is a doctor) is so encouraging of her career as well. He too went through the whole deal of her being in medical school, then residency and then a baby, and mA is a great husband AND an awesome father. Im sure if he’s around or comes across this thread, he would share his experiences too.
Re: To the Doctor's Wife...just wondering
I think it depends on the speciality of the doctor, my hubby is a GP now and he only works 5 hours a day at most! My sister is a surgeon and she works around 80 hours a week, she and her hubby work together so at least they can spend time together at work but it’s not a lifestyle I envy.
I am actually one of the lucky ones. My husband isn't crazy workaholic kind. He likes to spend time with me more so than going to work. Of course he has to go, be on time and all but I am glad that he wants to give me enough time too.
Like the thread stater said, It is easier for the doc men when they are married. I can't agree less. I think it is true. Guys have someone to take care of things at home though its not easy for the wife. But the ones who understand and care, they are appreciated for being supportive and playing a huge part in their husband's success.
For female docs, my observation is, its extremely tough on them. They have to come home cook and do all the things that a wife is responsible of. Also, their husband are the ones who are the "wives" at home. Sometimes this doesn't work for the relationship. Good supportive ones cook, clean and all that. But do we really want our husbands to be wives??!! hmmm .. lol... I can go on and on but to me.. a doc man's wife can be home and take care of things, but I think a doc woman's husband should be a doc or in some high earning profession as well. That's just my opinion.
I am actually one of the lucky ones. My husband isn't crazy workaholic kind. He likes to spend time with me more so than going to work. Of course he has to go, be on time and all but I am glad that he wants to give me enough time too. Like the thread stater said, It is easier for the doc men when they are married. I can't agree less. I think it is true. Guys have someone to take care of things at home though its not easy for the wife. But the ones who understand and care, they are appreciated for being supportive and playing a huge part in their husband's success. For female docs, my observation is, its extremely tough on them. They have to come home cook and do all the things that a wife is responsible of. Also, their husband are the ones who are the "wives" at home. Sometimes this doesn't work for the relationship. Good supportive ones cook, clean and all that. But do we really want our husbands to be wives??!! hmmm .. lol... I can go on and on but to me.. a doc man's wife can be home and take care of things, but I think a doc woman's husband should be a doc or in some high earning profession as well. That's just my opinion.
At least in US I know that a female doctors husband can retire early comfortably or be a stay home dad. :D
Re: To the Doctor's Wife...just wondering
I think female doctors should have a live-in nanny. My cousin has one and is able to keep her life balanced.
Re: To the Doctor's Wife...just wondering
Our dad WAS our live in nanny :)
I am actually one of the lucky ones. My husband isn't crazy workaholic kind. He likes to spend time with me more so than going to work. Of course he has to go, be on time and all but I am glad that he wants to give me enough time too. Like the thread stater said, It is easier for the doc men when they are married. I can't agree less. I think it is true. Guys have someone to take care of things at home though its not easy for the wife. But the ones who understand and care, they are appreciated for being supportive and playing a huge part in their husband's success. For female docs, my observation is, its extremely tough on them. They have to come home cook and do all the things that a wife is responsible of. Also, their husband are the ones who are the "wives" at home. Sometimes this doesn't work for the relationship. Good supportive ones cook, clean and all that. But do we really want our husbands to be wives??!! hmmm .. lol... I can go on and on but to me.. a doc man's wife can be home and take care of things, but I think a doc woman's husband should be a doc or in some high earning profession as well. That's just my opinion.
If all the male docs are marrying women who stay at home and do their laundry for them, then where the female docs supposed to go? Try to nab those married men at work instead?