Here is a scenerio: You are having your relatives over for dinner. Your MIL doesn’t like to sit with the men but your relatives prefer sitting together. What do you do? Do you segregate them keeping your MIL’s comfort in mind even though you don’t necessarily agree with her or do you keep it open and up to the guests to choose where they want to sit?
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Put your MIL in the backyard and have fun at the get together
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^ I second that.
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^^ Backyard is fine, I hope she doenst bark and bit your neighbors, make sure she has rabbies shots. I would tie her up to a tree.
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Don't do or say anything. Let the guests decide and go with the flow. If they end up sitting together then so be it. If MIL asks, tell her 'mehmaan khud he ghul mil gaye haiN, ab kya kiaa jaasakta hay'
But I like PD's idea too. Make sure you don't give her a mosquito repellent. She will need company.
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All are your guests. Respect the wishes of each. You can provide a seperate room to your MIL to go sit and enjoy her time. Anyone who likes to join her there should be able to (If she is comfortable with it).
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you lot are horrid
the new wannabee has the best idea
dont be mean to your MIL
you may need her later on in your life
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Ask MIL whether she, being an old woman most likely well past menopause, is really risking adultery by sitting with family men.
One of my maamijaans wears a burqa. She’s quite old, and her kids are all older now, some married. One day I asked her why she wears a burqa (her daughters sure do not)…
I asked “Ab iss umar mein, aap ko kaun dekhayga?”
Whew, good thing she’s got a sense of humor. She thought I was hilarious.
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Why not sit everyone together, with the men at one end of the room/table and the ladies at the other. That way she can still sit semi segregated with the other females yet it doesn't discourage any conversation between the sexes.
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lmao, how did you get away with that…
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Well, I don't think she's one of those religious folks that is like a tied up bomb ready to go off.
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"Ab iss umar mein, aap ko kaun dekhayga?"
PyariCgudia > haha some of my relatives say the same about burqa-walees :D
I think TheNewWannabe gave the best advice given the circumstances...my in-laws have made it pretty clear that they expect the men and women to be sitting separately...
What do you guys think about segregation at weddings or a bigger function than the dawwat at home? Aren't weddings supposed to be a time when the family gets together to celebrate? Why is it that people feel they can impose their views on others...Some people say they won't come if there won't be a segregated portion for them. Some other people say they won't come unless there is a barrier between the men and women. And still some other people say they won't come unless the barrier between the men and women is sealed so that no man can see the women at all and no woman can see the men...How do you deal with these kind of guests?
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PyariRani.. they aren't wrong are they? just trying to follow what they believe in.. but it is a tricky situation and different ppl have different ways to resolve the situation..
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tisk. thats disgusting. calling anyone’s mother names like that. calling names to ur mothers maybe a norm in ur family. but u have no right to talk like that about other people’s parents. u’ll know how horrible it is when ur own sons will talk like that about u n ur wife.
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^^^ Uprbringing..................hmmm he is a budha ghossat with a brain of a 2 year old. He is going through the terrible two phase at the age of 102.
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^ lol… 
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I am really amazed at ppls reply here.. i mean these are elder people.. yes they might not think like us but we have to respect them .. if they don't feel comfortable in mix gathering then we need to respect that... calling them names and stuff is the lowest thing one can do..
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You know, seating to make people feel comfortable is a pain in the neck but a necessary evil.. In-Laws seem to always just put that little bit extra stress just to remind all that they exist. Why not just place her between women at the table? Unfortunately you cannot please everyone, but you can please a majority. If this is not acceptable, I am with Danda on this one, put her in the backyard.
No patience today... sorry..
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minah but would u be calling names to ur in laws (parents in particular) like that just because they are causing some discomfort in ur life? :-/
i doubt any of u would do that if it was ur own mother instead of ur mother in law. i think parents should be the priority. ur guest should know how things are done in ur house and respect that.
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Suroor... at no time did I call an in-law any name, nor did I say it was acceptable, I was ignoring that part of these posts, it was addressed already by others...
I only addressed the seating arragment. I think also it is a cultural thing too in a way, the way I was taught was a guest must also make an accomodation to their host/ess because they should understand that there will be a lot of other people there and no one person should be catered to over others. As long as there is a reasonable attempt made to find a solution, why not compromise? No one should expect a host/ess to completely cater to them and ignore other guests comfort levels at the same time.
That would go for my mother too, who taught me this.