Re: Time to man up!!!
Please learn to be polite before writing long winded essays about religion hadith and scripture, people with repulsive behavior proclaiming to be the ambassadors of faith are the biggest challenge for promotion of faith. Who spews and who is a dude, what was your upbringing, when your father talks to you do you use the word spew on him. Only shameful people act in a shameful way.
Re: Time to man up!!!!!!!!!!!
What is this got to do with being man up?
You will have to stand up to society, In many cases not allow your family to cash in on the Shaadi. Treat women like a person not as commodity. How man men want to marry a rape victim.
Re: Time to man up!!!!!!!!!!!
Do you think it is time to man up for our young man and start marrying abused battered and divorced girls rather than looking for brand new out of the wrapper kind of girl, you can end up with a pretty awesome life partner, some of these ladies will be so appreciative that they will turn your life into heaven. You might end up with a girl that under normal circumstances not give you the time of day. Why this obsession with untouched. These girls have also matured a lot in dealing with the hardships of life. I know many such cases where the life for all parties is a bliss.
I would definately respect the girl more if she went through a hard life and have more admiration for her. Love it depends.
Re: Time to man up!!!!!!!!!!!
You will have to stand up to society, In many cases not allow your family to cash in on the Shaadi. Treat women like a person not as commodity. How man men want to marry a rape victim.
I think you have made many assumptions.
1- You think battered or divorced women somehow better than those who are not. You even gave reasons for that.
2- You think ALL men want unmarried women because of society pressure.
What if the man himself wants a girl out of wrapper?
Again, what is there for not being man in either scenarios?
You can only say that if the man wants to marry previously married woman but somehow he is being forced not to marry her, and that is while may occur but not generally the case.
Moreover: Just becaue it worked out for you, does not mean it will work for everyone.
Re: Time to man up!!!!!!!!!!!
Do you think it is time to man up for our young man and start marrying abused battered and divorced girls rather than looking for brand new out of the wrapper kind of girl, you can end up with a pretty awesome life partner, some of these ladies will be so appreciative that they will turn your life into heaven. You might end up with a girl that under normal circumstances not give you the time of day. Why this obsession with untouched. These girls have also matured a lot in dealing with the hardships of life. I know many such cases where the life for all parties is a bliss.
I get that our society needs to get out of the mentality that a divorced woman is "used goods" or will never be a good life partner...the kind of thinking that encourages women to stay in abusive situations etc..
but Something about saying someone who's had bad experiences will be grateful for a knight in shining armor....it's a little condescending.
A man who marries an abused/battered/divorced owman.....doesn't make him some kind of farishta. Every marriage requires work and compromise and will have some arguemnts.....it's about compatbility...period.
Re: Time to man up!!!
So your justification for marrying a woman who’s been through some tough events in her life is that she’ll be grateful? Are you for real or are you being a troll? What you’re saying is another form of torture and disrespect and nothing more than that. Treat the woman like a human being and not something that’s conveniently there to make you feel like a god.
Agar knight kay bas main ho to woh koshish karay ga keh yeh sab larkiyan jo keh apnay aap ko hoor pariyan samajhti hai woh sab buhat hi gandi zindagiyon say guzrain takay woh apnay asmaanon say neechay zameen par aa jayain aur phir knight jaisay literal knight aa kar in ko keechar say uthaye aur phir sari umar woh sartaj sartaj keh kar in ko bulain 
Who’s talking about divorce? Haven’t we had 4000 threads already on divorced women and their potential as future mates? What do you actually want to discuss? That whether divorced women have a right to be re-married or that divorced, abused women are a better catch because they’d be oh sooooo grateful someone decided to give them a “life”
Well you certainly didn’t marry for charity. Or maybe you did. And maybe you like to remind everyone around you about your amazing charity work and what an amazing person you are.
Yeah
Re: Time to man up!!!!!!!!!!!
Please learn to be polite before writing long winded essays about religion hadith and scripture, people with repulsive behavior proclaiming to be the ambassadors of faith are the biggest challenge for promotion of faith. Who spews and who is a dude, what was your upbringing, when your father talks to you do you use the word spew on him. Only shameful people act in a shameful way.
Your Excellency, Hazrat Knight Sahib Jee,
I beseech thy forgiveness for having smarted thy delicate sight and thine pristine soul with the utterance of such an abomination as "dude." I hope thou shalt be pleased with the above, more superior manner of address. Having made amends for this grievous offense, I shall now proceed to enlighten thee with some evident truths thine eyes do not see and thine mind does not grasp. First of all, I didn't bring up religion in this thread, you did. I also have not made the proclamation you accuse me of. And since you are in the habit of finding other Muslims to be deficient in character, faith, and mardaangi because they do not lead an "ideal life" like you (marrying a divorced/abused woman, env protection, grilling one lamb after another etc), I'm sure you'll find that the ambassador crown will fit snugly and prettily upon your head as you sit atop your throne looking down at the rest of us who fail to gaze up at you with the same " appreciation" as your beloved Queen.
Re: Time to man up!!!!!!!!!!!
Dumb troll
Re: Time to man up!!!!!!!!!!!
Does excessive use of exclamation marks help with the manning up process? :\
Re: Time to man up!!!!!!!!!!!
ARE YOU QUESTIONING THIS?!!!!!!!!
Re: Time to man up!!!!!!!!!!!
I wouldnae dare!
Re: Time to man up!!!
I apologise for the wrong choice of words but it is a known stat here that second marriage have a higher success rate, Pakistani community is witnessing an alarming increase in divorces both here and in Pakistan, the top reasons cited by Pakistani psychologists are uncontrollable egos, material demands, unwillingness to compromise, and third party influence, In our case the egos were no existent, we had realised that love is more important than money and we fought and resisted third party influences.
She is a strong woman, CMA from McGill, fluent in French, English and Spanish she did not need the rescue, she just quit 100K job. It is her choice to love and appreciate me and you have the right to judge our love and appreciation for each other. She has never spoken a mean word to me even when I lost millions in stock market. She came up to me and said. " She will happily sleep in the street with me." On the other hand were nasty gold digger family. Interview always focused on how much money I make what car I drive and how big my house is.
Princesses are you serious, are you setting them up for imminent disaster, this world belongs to tough girls and boys. One of the favorite instructions from my kids coach is, we are going to paddle but come prepared for every thing, meaning bring your running shoes/track shoes/hiking shoes and snow and rain gear, same with life raise kids prepared for everything and any thing. These young hostesses that worked for me got up at 5.30 am, went to college, ate on the run, came to work for me 2-8pm, worked out before going home, did homework after getting home. Princesses step in this world will get squished. Read about gratitude please.
Excerpt.
3. Couples](http://www.yourtango.com/couples) desire to “do it right this time.” Partners in a second marriage are all marked by the same drive to really make the relationship work. This is not to say that first marriages are devoid of drive, but remarried people experience this drive on another level. Having already experienced the end of a marriage, people in second marriages develop a heightened determination to not take anything for granted. Remarried people also know too well what will happen if the marriage does not work out.4. Couples have a sense of gratitude. In addition to drive, people who are in second marriages possess a deep sense of gratitude—gratitude for a second chance and gratitude for life and love, knowing how sweet and fleeting they can be. Gratitude elevates us. In her seminal book, Codependent No More, Melody Beattie describes the transformational powers of gratitude:“Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow.”
Re: Time to man up!!!!!!!!!!!
Try to forget she was abused/battered and her trauma is what made her the perfect partner for you. The experiences you described were probably horrific for her...so let's not bring them up like this. Its not nice nor very husband like.
Re: Time to man up!!!!!!!!!!!
Your Excellency, Hazrat Knight Sahib Jee,
I beseech thy forgiveness for having smarted thy delicate sight and thine pristine soul with the utterance of such an abomination as "dude." I hope thou shalt be pleased with the above, more superior manner of address. Having made amends for this grievous offense, I shall now proceed to enlighten thee with some evident truths thine eyes do not see and thine mind does not grasp. First of all, I didn't bring up religion in this thread, you did. I also have not made the proclamation you accuse me of. And since you are in the habit of finding other Muslims to be deficient in character, faith, and mardaangi because they do not lead an "ideal life" like you (marrying a divorced/abused woman, env protection, grilling one lamb after another etc), I'm sure you'll find that the ambassador crown will fit snugly and prettily upon your head as you sit atop your throne looking down at the rest of us who fail to gaze up at you with the same " appreciation" as your beloved Queen.
methinks the correct word wouldst be "doth"
Re: Time to man up!!!!!!!!!!!
methinks the correct word wouldst be "doth"
I thank ye kindly milady.
Re: Time to man up!!!!!!!!!!!
Try to forget she was abused/battered and her trauma is what made her the perfect partner for you. The experiences you described were probably horrific for her...so let's not bring them up like this. Its not nice nor very husband like.
We are seeing the light at the end of the tunnel for us, what about millions other say like rape victims, when will we man up and hold their hands, She discusses her past with me all the time, a lot of good things happened in that experience, army of volunteers, councillors good Samaritans friends etc. it makes you grow as a person, I know if I die she is strong enough to take care of the children. Why can't women discuss the abuse they were subjected to openly, as someone says they deserve to be treated as a person, why brush it under the carpet. The families of rape victims don't seek justice as it lowers the honor of brothers and fathers.
I can without a doubt say that I would not have appreciated her so much if I did not have bad relationships, so the same goes or her.
Re: Time to man up!!!!!!!!!!!
I think you have made many assumptions.
1- You think battered or divorced women somehow better than those who are not. You even gave reasons for that.
2- You think ALL men want unmarried women because of society pressure.
What if the man himself wants a girl out of wrapper?
Again, what is there for not being man in either scenarios?
You can only say that if the man wants to marry previously married woman but somehow he is being forced not to marry her, and that is while may occur but not generally the case.
Moreover: Just becaue it worked out for you, does not mean it will work for everyone.
Classy way to disagree with civility, I am not saying that this is how it should be for everyone, heck I am not convinced as to what the solution is, I do see a disaster approaching with huge egos, greed, unwillingness to compromise and trouble makers. My friend a wedding photographer mentioned to me that people are divorcing sooner than he can develop pictures, the divorcee pool is ever growing. Maybe the best match is in that pool and maybe not.
Re: Time to man up!!!!!!!!!!!
My friend a wedding photographer mentioned to me that people are divorcing sooner than he can develop pictures, the divorcee pool is ever growing.
at least we know you are getting your statistics from a reliable source......
:D
Re: Time to man up!!!!!!!!!!!
We are seeing the light at the end of the tunnel for us, what about millions other say like rape victims, when will we man up and hold their hands, She discusses her past with me all the time, a lot of good things happened in that experience, army of volunteers, councillors good Samaritans friends etc. it makes you grow as a person, I know if I die she is strong enough to take care of the children. Why can't women discuss the abuse they were subjected to openly, as someone says they deserve to be treated as a person, why brush it under the carpet. The families of rape victims don't seek justice as it lowers the honor of brothers and fathers.
I can without a doubt say that I would not have appreciated her so much if I did not have bad relationships, so the same goes or her.
I can discuss my prior marriage (and have on these forums) until the moon comes up...lekin faida kya hai? Jo hogaya vo hogaya...and its the past for a reason...because it wasn't meant to be your present.
Yeah, these things are fine in the beginning but after a while they shouldn't come up.
Re: Time to man up!!!!!!!!!!!
I can discuss my prior marriage (and have on these forums) until the moon comes up...lekin faida kya hai? Jo hogaya vo hogaya...and its the past for a reason...because it wasn't meant to be your present.
Yeah, these things are fine in the beginning but after a while they shouldn't come up.
I can see in your writings that it was a tremendous growth experience for you, as they say whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger. When my boys grow up we will openly accept and embrace divorced and or abused girls. They will honor respect and love their wives. Respect of females is a big part of their up brining. They cook, clean and do laundry.