Re: Time off/breaks in a relationship?
1) Being on break and breaking up are completely two different things. If two people are dating, and if one of them dissappears without any notice all of a sudden, ignored your calls/e-mails etc.....that does NOT mean you're on "break". That means you got dumped. Being on a "break" is when the couple actually had a discussion...and BOTH agree to take a "break" for whatever reason. During that discussion, that couple either mutually agree on a specific period of time...or choose not to. But being on a break is decided by BOTH people in the relationship....not when one vanishes.
2) I met my fiance a little over 3 years ago. Once we've been dating for like 4-5 months....he wanted to take a break to sort some things out (our cultures are different and he wanted time to decide whether or not he wanted to continue despite that). We had a very open discussion about this and mutually agreed on a 2 month "break". So for 2 months, we had 0 contact. After that we met up, had another discussion, and decided to get back together. Now we're getting married in like 2 months. The length of time appropriate depends on individual couples and how long they're comfortable with.
1) In the beginning stages of dating....BEFORE the parties have decided on marriage or even met each other families etc.....I think its unreasonale to expect contact every single day. As adults, both should have their own lives....school, career, friends should keep them busy. There were many times when I didn't hear from him for several days....(or he didn't hear from me)....and it was nothing more than us just being busy. But we never went more than a week without being in touch.
2) However, if one of the people in the relationship need some type of contact every-single-day.....then there's nothing wrong with that. They just need to find someone who feels the same way.
1) Some people know what they want right away. Others need days, weeks, or even months to decide on major life choices. Nothing wrong with either. If you're not able to deal with someone who needs extra time....then no point in continuing the relatioship. At the end, only you can decide whether or not that person is worth the wait.
2) If my guy didn't contact me for at least a week.....the 1st time I'd try to contact him and see what's going on. However, after calling him 2-3 times....if he didn't return my calls....then I'd consider it done.
Good stuff, Paheli. What do you think about those "silent treatments" a partner may give to their partner after an argument? For example, you have an argument/fight and neither partner is willing to apologize or one of them is being stubborn while the other wants the other to realize their mistake to they dont want to initiate contact nor chase for a reply?
If the person stays on their stubborn-rut for a week, do you suggest one of them gets their sh*t together and rather than trying to teach the other person a lesson, should just try ask what is going on and if there is still something going on, they should just consider it "done"?
