I have a rishta from a guy in Amreeka ( i am in the uk and was raised here). He has a good job ( although working hours are like 8-10pm :/) and nice fam and reasonable looking.
He likes me pics, my fam and its moving forward.
However for some reason we seem to be having a’culture clash’
He thinks I eat tea and crumpets all day and I watch rugby all day (genuinely) and i have to actually explain myself..?!
Also I find him really full on friendly and he does not understand or doesn’t like sarcasm/satire/dark jokes- but for those of who are british - our whole humor and way of communicating is based around satire and sarcasm - where he finds it unecessary and rude.
( on a lighter note I really hope he doesnt say fanny pack at any point :p)
Now am i being silly and thinking this just will not work? should I try and change myself because this rishta is SO good?
Re: This is really really silly but talk some sense into me ( rishta scenario)
Yes, you are being silly! Snap out of it pagli and give the dude (amreekan for bloke) a chance! Me, Slims, Reha, RV and all the other Amreekan guppies will tutor you through the culture clash (which really isn't as big of a deal as you think).
Case in point...pretty much everyone outside of Texas (northern US in particular) thinks I ride horses all day long, to and from work etc....I can't remember the last time I was in the vicinity of a horse. So even in different parts of the same country there are "culture clashes".
Re: This is really really silly but talk some sense into me ( rishta scenario)
inspi: if rishta is good, then you both need to work together. i dont think, every guy/gal is perfect. if you both cant show iota of sacrifice/adaptability/existence/differences then how come whole marriage thing could work. my two cents.
Re: This is really really silly but talk some sense into me ( rishta scenario)
someone needs to tutor me on american humor.....I am being serious aswell.
e.g. he said something like - i have no one to go the movies with ......I said ' aww shall i play a violin' in a humorous tone which i have said like x100000 times to people here everytime they say something like that and its considered funny - but he was like I dont get it and found me 'rude'
Re: This is really really silly but talk some sense into me ( rishta scenario)
talk a couple times more with him .. and see how it goes .. then youll be able to tell whether hes just sensitive defensive and lacks self esteem or if hes really a jerk ..
Re: This is really really silly but talk some sense into me ( rishta scenario)
is he in US but did not grow up in US?
that violin bit is a common joke here as well.
so either the dude needs more de-fobbing, more de-nerding, humor bootcamp, or un-girly-fying
or you need to send him some tampons.
yeah, i know u may later fall in love with him and the sentences above would look really silly but I am calling it as I see it.
fob, socially awkward, wimp or a jerk ...this is my initial assessment..
unless
he was joking back in response and you did not get it :p
Re: This is really really silly but talk some sense into me ( rishta scenario)
X2 PHEW most reassuring post ever that I am not some meany.
you have actually worked it out - just discovered he came the US a young teen but cannot tell at all in terms of accent etc.... I also on closer analysis think hes just either socially awkward or nervous.
I am of course going to give him a chance and talk to him more......
I just need to get the sillyness out of my head!
He is a good guy with a good job and he is interested I am determined to be normal and make this work.
Re: This is really really silly but talk some sense into me ( rishta scenario)
X2 PHEW most reassuring post ever that I am not some meany.
you have actually worked it out - just discovered he came the US a young teen but cannot tell at all in terms of accent etc.... I also on closer analysis think hes just either socially awkward or nervous.
I am of course going to give him a chance and talk to him more......
I just need to get the sillyness out of my head!
He is a good guy with a good job and he is interested I am determined to be normal and make this work.
Look kiddo...learn to love your instincts, you have a good head on your shoulders. Had it been one of those lost mentally 16 year old chronic teeny boppers, i would have lectured them, but you are an independent minded, in with the flow type of person so if something seems off...investigate it.
communication, compassion, cooperation..all critical in a relationship. you dont have to be xerox copies, but have to be able to relate. I am less concerned by him not getting it...but more that he found it rude...like dude, if you dont get it, how can you find it rude if you have no idea what it means..unless ..well you know what I mean mate..noted in the previous post
Re: This is really really silly but talk some sense into me ( rishta scenario)
Look kiddo...learn to love your instincts, you have a good head on your shoulders. Had it been one of those lost mentally 16 year old chronic teeny boppers, i would have lectured them, but you are an independent minded, in with the flow type of person so if something seems off...investigate it.
communication, compassion, cooperation..all critical in a relationship. you dont have to be xerox copies, but have to be able to relate. I am less concerned by him not getting it...but more that he found it rude...like dude, if you dont get it, how can you find it rude if you have no idea what it means..unless ..well you know what I mean mate..noted in the previous post
Re: This is really really silly but talk some sense into me ( rishta scenario)
Yes, you are being silly! Snap out of it pagli and give the dude (amreekan for bloke) a chance! Me, Slims, Reha, RV and all the other Amreekan guppies will tutor you through the culture clash (which really isn't as big of a deal as you think).
Case in point...pretty much everyone outside of Texas (northern US in particular) thinks I ride horses all day long, to and from work etc....I can't remember the last time I was in the vicinity of a horse. So even in different parts of the same country there are "culture clashes".
This is true. That was my perception of Texas till I moved there. I got off the plane and started wondering where all the big floppy hats were?
