Does that Babul / mayka type concepts exist in European and American societies?
Do girls cry like anything while leaving parents home when they get married?
How do you see concept of Babul and Mayka in desi society?
Re: The concept of Babul / mayka in Europe and America?
Yes it was not just a concept but a practice in Western cultures before the industrial revolution. The concept of Susuraal is still practiced amongst Royals and Princess Diana certainly did not like living with her Saas the Queen.
In typical White Weddings, you would see the bride getting emotional when her father gives her away/during vows or before saying her goodbye.
Re: The concept of Babul / mayka in Europe and America?
Interesting, so there are some English versions of ‘Babul ki duaen leti ja, ja tujh ko sukhi sansaar mile’. 
Re: The concept of Babul / mayka in Europe and America?
Hehe. Noooo.
Well at least I don’t know any. I know at weddings, it used to be a tradition (or still is to some extent) to sing old Folk songs. The English folks I’ve come across don’t have such verses but I would say the when it’s time for the bride to leave, the melody becomes a lot slower, smoother with underlying notes of sweat melancholy.
Re: The concept of Babul / mayka in Europe and America?
How unromantic. Then there won't be dialogues like 'doli main ja rahi ho, arthi pe uthna' and 'aaj se wohi tumhara ghar hai'. Desis are so melodramatic.
Re: The concept of Babul / mayka in Europe and America?
Yes they are and quite poetic as well. They love talking hyperbolically.
I love Punjabi wedding tappays or what you may also call folk songs. I always nudge my mother and whisper in her ear saying "what does that mean/what is she saying", lol. I love the rhythm, humour, sarcasm and above all, the relevance and reliability of all those mother in law teases.
Re: The concept of Babul / mayka in Europe and America?
I got a book ‘Sindh ja geet’ related to research on folk songs. That book accounts for various stages of wedding and other functions and songs rendered on such occasion. The interesting part of the book is when writer tells how technological advancement affected such songs and how use of terms TV, Radio, etc were accommodated in such songs.
I do love Punjabi mahiye and tappe as they tell lot about customs of the land.
One of faded and vivid memories of childhood are listening to Sindhi songs album by Samina Kanwal (Sindhi / Balochi singer) released at the occasion of Benazir Bhutto’s wedding and cassette’s cover had BB in yellow dress of maayoon . That audio cassette used to end with a sad rukhsati song, where singer used her sobs to create the environment.
I used to ask amma, ‘benazir kiyun ro rahi hai?’. For me, it was Benazir who was singing the songs 
Amma’s reply used to be ‘wo apna ghar choR rahi hai aur uski maa Nusarrat akeli reh jae gi’ 
Re: The concept of Babul / mayka in Europe and America?
Hehe. That's sweet. I guess Benezir's wedding was a significant event in Pakistan or at least in Sindh.
I agree with the writer that due technological advancement and media influence, singing folks at weddings is becoming a dying art. It's unfortunate because for me, singing tappey is my utmost favourite part of Punjabi weddings despite my inability to grasp the message behind those verses.
As a self confessed Ice Queen, even I have to admit that most of the lyrics of traditional Rukhsati songs are absolutely heartbreaking and I am almost inclined to think that most of the lyrics is perhaps written by men? Such powerful emotive language is used, even as a piece of poetry, the use of language, rhythm and structure is remarkable.
Re: The concept of Babul / mayka in Europe and America?
I think you are right that these Rukhsati songs are actually written by men. Men were writers of traditional folk stories from Shah Latif to Waris Shah, catharsis of sub-continent's ladies feelings was done by male poets. A topic which we already discussed at length.
Re: The concept of Babul / mayka in Europe and America?
Saada chiriyan da chamba ae, babul assan ud jaana
Saadi lambi udaari way, babul keray des jaana 
Re: The concept of Babul / mayka in Europe and America?
Then who that lady who said 'main to bhool chali babul ka des, piya ka ghar piyara lage'?
Re: The concept of Babul / mayka in Europe and America?
I grew up listening to this song in PTV dramas whenever there is a rukhsati (which is inevitable in a desi drama) so it does not really ever hit me but on my sister’s wedding (There was no music played though)
I am not sure if u heard that song …
Oyai meray dadhya rabba … I feel like being lost whenever listen to that song. The music and these line hit u like anything.
I only foud out later that its a rukhsati song :teary1:
Re: The concept of Babul / mayka in Europe and America?
kabhi khushi kabhi gham ... dono saath saath chalte hain life main.
Re: The concept of Babul / mayka in Europe and America?
Yeah it’s a nice song.
There are happy songs too …
Chitta kukkar baneray tay
Kasni dupattay waliye
Munda sadqay tere tay 
Re: The concept of Babul / mayka in Europe and America?
Madhaniyan is clear cut rukhsati song. The lyrics are so emotionally blackmailing
♪ Madhaniyan | Surinder Kaur](http://folkpunjab.com/surinder-kaur/hai-o-mere-dadheya-rabba/)
Madhaniyan
Haye o mereya dadheya rabba
kinhaaN jammianN kinhaaN ne le janiaaN
Chhole
Babal tere mehlaN vichoN
Satt rangiya kabotar bole
Chhoii
Babal tere mehlaN vichoN
Teri lado pardesan hoii
Pheeta
Ehna sakkiaN babhiaN ne
Dola taur ke kacha dudh peeta
Pheeta
Mere apne veeraN ne
Dola taur ke aggaN nu keeta
KalliaN
ManwaN dheyaN millan laggiaN
Chare kandhaN ne chobare diaN halliaN
Re: The concept of Babul / mayka in Europe and America?
But thats not related to Babul.
aap ye try karen:
Babla Way Lay Jaayen Na Log Mujh Ko - Afshan Ahmed **SUBOHY …
and bring some European version of such emotions
Re: The concept of Babul / mayka in Europe and America?
There are not as such european emotions attached with rukhsati of the daughter 
On a lighter note check out this song
Hip Hip Huraah - Song - Mere Dad Ki Maruti - Benazir Shaikh - YouTube
It made me 
Re: The concept of Babul / mayka in Europe and America?
No youtube at work. Will check it out later.
Another one I just remembered:
Sanu kheriyan de nal na tor babula ve
Kardi minnatan tay kendi hath jor babula
and
Main nai jana kheriyan de nal by shafqat amanat ali
I know the theme is a bit diff but they are all rukhsati related.
Re: The concept of Babul / mayka in Europe and America?
I think you are right that these Rukhsati songs are actually written by men. Men were writers of traditional folk stories from Shah Latif to Waris Shah, catharsis of sub-continent's ladies feelings was done by male poets. A topic which we already discussed at length.
I wonder how many of them were fathers of daughters. It's interesting to see almost all Rukhsati songs reflect upon father-daughter relationships whereas traditionally, girls spend far more time with their mothers in sub-continent (and even in other parts of the world).
Re: The concept of Babul / mayka in Europe and America?
As Jolie state, the concept was common among European royalty in centuries past. An interesting case of an English queen who had issues with her "susural" was Elizabeth Woodville, wife and Queen consort of King Edward IV. She is best known as the mother of the "princes in the tower."
She was rather disliked by her husband's family for a variety of reasons and this plagued her throughout her husband's reign. Among the reasons that she was disliked by her "susural" were that she was a "commoner" (her family were members of the aristocracy but were not royalty), she was previously married and had children, and that she and Edward had married secretly (and this was quite a contentious issue as it was intended for Richard to marry a French princess for political reasons).