Re: Thank You - After You’ve had Your Dream Wedding…
Agreed, totally! I am even seeing this for Bismillah parties thrown for little kids, that are only for ladies/ kids invited as guests and at home with home cooked food served. That’s just plain greedy!
I can’t wrap my mind around the idea of paying for
my plate and then some extra. Since when did an invitiation to a wedding (or in fact any event) become about paying for your meal?
So, let’s say the person who TOTALLY can’t afford it (and I’ve seen these people) throw a lavish $100 per head (and some weddings cost more than $100 per head) wedding and they invite mian, biwi, and their two kids - why on earth would a guest pay minimum $400 as a guest PLUS something extra? It does not make sense at all. I would rather decline such an invitation, rather than pay that much to attend the over-the-top event that’s really just a show-off event for the host. It then goes that the person who threw the modest $25 per head wedding receives less money as a gift - why should someone’s modesty in expenditure be penalized and another’s outrageous spending be rewarded?
You know the old saying:
“Chaddar dekh kai, paon pehlana chahiyay ” - that applies 100% to a wedding. A host should not throw a wedding they cannot afford (or one where they assume the guest will pay their own way) and nor should they expect guests to subsidize it. That’s like saying, I’m hosting a dawat in my house, but one guest is buying my chicken, the other the soft drinks, and another the dessert - what happens to a good host’s obligations?
Sure weddings are expensive, but a host should 1) only host an event they can afford to (i.e. no need for the $12K photographer or the $10 bonbonierres, or the Bunto outfit) and 2) only invite as many guests as make sense. No need for a 1000 person guest list.