For those of us living outside of Pak, how important do you think it is to teach our kids Urdu? Not necessarily reading and writing but at least speaking it? Aunties tell me all the time to speak to my kids in Urdu and to make sure they respond in it as well. Just wondering what other parents are doing?
Re: Teaching Urdu
Speaking urdu…thas what 
Its highky imp to me… In my mom’s words : “acha hai urdu aye inko (kids)…takay hum ko mu tayra ker kay bola nay na pare” lol
If midget didnt know urdu…he would have never enjoyed himself like he did on a rec.ent trip to pak…he xould talk to everyone…even their maasis… He felt confident cuz everyone got him… Which was so perfect cuz a lotof my fam doesnt k ow how to speak english properly.
He wouldnt have bonded with them if he couldnt get his point actoss…
I hope he stays this way … I dont care bout him knowing how to read or write urdu… Not imp… But speaking… Absolute must!
Re: Teaching Urdu
Oh and having said that...urdu is only imp cuz that is what my fam talk in...if i were punjabi...i wouldnt bother with urdu as much..u would want them to know punjabi....or sindhi if i were sindhi... Etc
Re: Teaching Urdu
:k:
Re: Teaching Urdu
Speak and talk to them in Urdu or Punjabi or whatever language you want them to speak other than English. There is no other way. Make a rule, NO English in home. If they still reply or talk in Urdu, ignore and let them repeat what they are saying in Urdu or Punjabi. You have to follow the rule yourself as well and enforce it strictly for it to make any difference.
One of the misconceptions and mistakes Desi parents make is that they fear that their kids would not learn English that way. THEY WILL. In school, they speak only English, with their friends and teachers, they speak English. What they won't learn is their native tongue in school or with their friends so that's where parents responsibility comes into play.
A Chinese friend was concerned about her son not speaking Chinese, so she made a rule that no other language at home other than Chinese. It was hard for her son for a while but then he started speaking without any issue.
A lot of Desi parents just speak English with their kids or mix A LOT of English with Urdu/Punjabi and that may end up to be the largest, most saddest cultural ROBBERY that future generation may experience. If your kids are not speaking their mother/native tongue, your grand kids certainly wont.
Re: Teaching Urdu
Speak and talk to them in Urdu or Punjabi or whatever language you want them to speak other than English. There is no other way. Make a rule, NO English in home. If they still reply or talk in Urdu, ignore and let them repeat what they are saying in Urdu or Punjabi. You have to follow the rule yourself as well and enforce it strictly for it to make any difference.
One of the misconceptions and mistakes Desi parents make is that they fear that their kids would not learn English that way. THEY WILL. In school, they speak only English, with their friends and teachers, they speak English. What they won't learn is their native tongue in school or with their friends so that's where parents responsibility comes into play.
A Chinese friend was concerned about her son not speaking Chinese, so she made a rule that no other language at home other than Chinese. It was hard for her son for a while but then he started speaking without any issue.
A lot of Desi parents just speak English with their kids or mix A LOT of English with Urdu/Punjabi and that may end up to be the largest, most saddest cultural ROBBERY that future generation may experience. If your kids are not speaking their mother/native tongue, your grand kids certainly wont.
Aur phir kya hoye ga? Humari comm doob jaye gi?
We have so much population that worry not. Our native language is going nowhere. Having said that, I do think it is important to teach your kids your native language but it isn't like I'm going to be sweating over it.
Re: Teaching Urdu
Aur phir kya hoye ga? Humari comm doob jaye gi?
We have so much population that worry not. Our native language is going nowhere. Having said that, I do think it is important to teach your kids your native language but it isn't like I'm going to be sweating over it.
Well, life will go on but you will rob them off what could have been easily passed on to them. And its not about saving the language, its about having an edge over others who can only speak one language. What if they need to go back home? What if things in US and UK aren't so great for living or raising a family? From the looks of it, things are certainly headed that way, maybe not today, not in next 10 years but 20, 30, 50 years on? It will allow them to move freely without being stuck to English speaking countries. And if that isn't a concern, what about passing your culture, your language on to your generation?
If you feel your kids don't need to know their native language then thats the decision you make for yourself and your kids, sanu ki. humara tou kaam hai ke acha mashwara dena, log na samjhain tou un ki marzi, koe force tou hai nahi. :D
Re: Teaching Urdu
uh what he said is true if the parents don't speak your native language than your kids won't be speaking it either.
I'm fortunate to be fluent in both Japanese and English because my mom and dad read me books in both languages as well as watch T.V in 2 languages. mind you I also used to be at least one more language while I was a kid because the maids and driver was strictly told to teach me their native language.
my SO and I will be teaching our kids Urdu, Japanese and English using the same methods...
Re: Teaching Urdu
This topic has been done so so many times... I personally think it is very very very important to teach our kids Urdu. I live in a multicultural neighborhood.. umm NYC of course .. I see all kind of people from all kind of backgrounds on daily basis, I don't think anyone disagrees that its very important to teach their kids their native language. I don't undersand why some desis think its not important to teach our kids our language. I can't tell you how wrong it is to assume that your kid won't learn English. I've read articles after articles, reasearch after research on how well kids who know more than one language do in their studies and overall.
My own nephew is fluent in Urdu but my SIL (my husband's sister) didn't emphasize much of this language thing on her kids, well now my in laws are least interested in talking to those kids because there is such a huge language barrier. Those kids don't understand anything in Urdu. Pretty sad to be honest.
Its not about humari qoum doob jaey gi ya nahi.. its about taking pride in your culture or language and passing it on to your kids. I am sure everyone is going to survive and live happily just by knowing English too but like jaan leva said it is something that your kids can easily learn and have a uniqueness they can call their own and take pride in, why not give it to them.
Re: Teaching Urdu
This topic has been done so so many times... I personally think it is very very very important to teach our kids Urdu. I live in a multicultural neighborhood.. umm NYC of course .. I see all kind of people from all kind of backgrounds on daily basis, I don't think anyone disagrees that its very important to teach their kids their native language. I don't undersand why some desis think its not important to teach our kids our language. I can't tell you how wrong it is to assume that your kid won't learn English. I've read articles after articles, reasearch after research on how well kids who know more than one language do in their studies and overall.
My own nephew is fluent in Urdu but my SIL (my husband's sister) didn't emphasize much of this language thing on her kids, well now my in laws are least interested in talking to those kids because there is such a huge language barrier. Those kids don't understand anything in Urdu. Pretty sad to be honest.
Its not about humari qoum doob jaey gi ya nahi.. its about taking pride in your culture or language and passing it on to your kids. I am sure everyone is going to survive and live happily just by knowing English too but like jaan leva said it is something that your kids can easily learn and have a uniqueness they can call their own and take pride in, why not give it to them.
exactly. its pretty sad for those parents who don't care about their culture,language and such and yet call themselves that nationality.. when really they don't even know anything about it.
I don't agree with grandparents favoring one over another just because of a language barrier.. thats just pathetic tbh =/
Re: Teaching Urdu
exactly. its pretty sad for those parents who don't care about their culture,language and such and yet call themselves that nationality.. when really they don't even know anything about it.
I don't agree with grandparents favoring one over another just because of a language barrier.. thats just pathetic tbh =/
Its not favoring.. I don't think they don't love those kids.. its just that umm they just don't get what being said to them. You don't think language can be a barrier for grandparents who don't speak English.
Re: Teaching Urdu
Its not favoring.. I don't think they don't love those kids.. its just that umm they just don't get what being said to them. You don't think language can be a barrier for grandparents who don't speak English.
Yes, I don't think it would be such a problem. I mean both my grand mothers could communicate to each other even though neither of them knew each others languages. I communicated with my Japanese grand mother just fine even though my Japanese was terrible when I was little.
Re: Teaching Urdu
Have to disagree with you here. My husband's side of the family speaks a different language, when they talk to me I try my best to understand/reply to them but to be honest, I would prefer not talking to them. I don't feel comfortable with the fact that I am not getting what they are saying and if I would say the appropriate thing. Yes language can be a problem.... you may have your own experience but I am sure I wouldn't understand what a Chinese person is saying because I dont' understand that language.
Re: Teaching Urdu
Have to disagree with you here. My husband's side of the family speaks a different language, when they talk to me I try my best to understand/reply to them but to be honest, I would prefer not talking to them. I don't feel comfortable with the fact that I am not getting what they are saying and if I would say the appropriate thing. Yes language can be a problem.... you may have your own experience but I am sure I wouldn't understand what a Chinese person is saying because I dont' understand that language.
I wouldn't understand what Chinese say either but I try to learn same with my SOs parents language. Fortunately for me they speak English but I haven't been to their house yet so I don't know what will happen if I stay there for a month or more. They predominantly speak Urdu in their house so perhaps I'll feel uncomfortable then not knowing what they are talking about and feeling left out but till then I'll try my best to try to understand what my MIL is saying and keep on talking to her even if her english isn't that good.
Re: Teaching Urdu
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Well, life will go on but you will rob them off what could have been easily passed on to them. And its not about saving the language, its about having an edge over others who can only speak one language. What if they need to go back home? What if things in US and UK aren't so great for living or raising a family? From the looks of it, things are certainly headed that way, maybe not today, not in next 10 years but 20, 30, 50 years on? It will allow them to move freely without being stuck to English speaking countries. And if that isn't a concern, what about passing your culture, your language on to your generation?
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That's exactly what got me thinking about this...I was brought up in a family where Urdu was given importance so, while my bro and I can't write it, we can speak it and read it a bit, if we really try. But, I married into a family where Urdu isn't that important. My husband and his siblings have always spoken to their parents in English and while they do know Urdu, they aren't comfortable in it and they don't see the importance of their children knowing it. It's harder for me to have my kids speak Urdu because I'm the only one doing it; even my ils speak to them in English and my Urdu isn't great so it's just easier to speak in English. But then I got thinking about what jaan leva and Spiral wrote, about giving the kids an advantage, and I thought maybe I should be strict about it...that's why I started this thread.
Re: Teaching Urdu
I think it's rather important. I just feel the next generation or certainly the one after that will have no culture at all. Well at least Pakistani culture and language for forms the basis of that culture. I think its very important personally.
Re: Teaching Urdu
I think it's rather important. I just feel the next generation or certainly the one after that will have no culture at all. Well at least Pakistani culture and language for forms the basis of that culture. I think its very important personally.
We speak Punjabi at home but with kids we speak urdu. Now my nephews and daughter not only speak urdu, also punjabi and english.
Re: Teaching Urdu
We speak Punjabi at home but with kids we speak urdu. Now my nephews and daughter not only speak urdu, also punjabi and english.
Same here. My son started off with really good, "thaith" punjabi. I was watching his old videos when he was around 20 months or so and he goes "baba ithey aao sofa te betho please" just too good. Everyone would get a shock to see him speak like that. He would call door, a "booa" or leg "laatt" and then he stopped speaking and switched to urdu? I don't know what happened. I still insisted on talking to him in punjabi and now he speaks both punjabi and urdu and often mixes english words with it but I correct him.
Examples:
meri book buhat nice hai would change to meri kitaab buhat achi hai so he repeats that, i usually don't have to correct him more than once. Then few weeks ago I asked him "aajj school kesa si" he replied back in english (it was good), I asked him again, he replied back in english and I asked him again at that moment he realized what I was looking for. He said "acha tha" so i told him, you should answer in language you are spoken to. If your teacher talks to you in english, you reply back in english right? So, when someone speaking in urdu or punjabi talks to you, you reply back in that same language. He didn't like that lecture and said "oh brother!" "theek hai baba" :D
Re: Teaching Urdu
i agree with the folks here who say its important. i want my kid to be able to communicate with my side of the family, like understanding jokes without needing translation (ruins the punch line :p) and speaking to his great grandmother iA too who doesn't speak any english. plus, because he's a mixed race kid, i want to ensure my culture/religion are represented properly and thoroughly to him so he doesn't grow up feeling left out of anything. i don't think i would be so sensitive about it if i had married a desi, to be honest, because we do speak a lot of english at home and always have, over urdu. my younger brother barely speaks any urdu and when he does, you can tell he's not comforable because its not his first language. i'd feel terrible if my kid was the same, frankly. i have a very good friend who married a french dude. she only speaks to her kid in urdu, he only speaks to him in french. kid is 3 now and he responds in urdu to his mom, french to his dad. it helps that both parents also mostly understand both the languages involved, but i think they've got the right idea. a lot of the credit goes to my friend for being so consistent and diligent about it.
i speak to the baby in urdu primarily but when hubby is home, i do a mix of urdu and english so hubby doesn't feel left out (he's not desi), and my parents only speak to the baby in urdu. so far, he responds more to urdu than english. hubby hasn't spoken to baby in his language at all thus far so i'm not sure how much of it he'll grasp as he grows up. it doesn't help that its an extremely difficult one and sounds like garbled klingon. doh!
i don't speak any of hubby's language and i'm constantly reminding him and his family to translate their conversations for me. it gets super annoying, honestly.
Re: Teaching Urdu
Aur phir kya hoye ga? Humari comm doob jaye gi?
We have so much population that worry not. Our native language is going nowhere. Having said that, I do think it is important to teach your kids your native language but it isn't like I'm going to be sweating over it.
I see you want your kids to lose their culture and become cool, keep at it as the rest of us Pakistanis laugh and ridicule your kids when they speak thathli Urdu.