Talaq and nikah

[Monk]

@Cheegum

I don’t get it. First you spell it as talaq and then as talak. Is there no end to this madness?

dude it only counts if you say it 3 time with Q
or 3 times with K

Thats way.. I was keeping it safe.

[mamababaandbaby]

Re: Talaq and nikah

at psyah

[Ambassador1]

O my God, that’s crazy… Thanks for the laugh.

@psyah

Peace Monk bhai

Islam is about making things as simple as possible. When we force it to go simpler than possible then we get something called “the way of the monk”

Real life?

Ok here is clip from your real life:

Husband: “Oi, why don’t you listen to me, hein?”
Wife: “Eh, shut-up oye, I will kick you”
Husband: “You rude woman, should never have married you”
Wife: “Ulloo ki ulaad, divorce me then if you have the guts”
Husband: “I give you talaaq!”
Wife:“Wait I want witnesses”, she dials a number on her phone, “Haan, Monk darling, please come to my house, you know where it is, I want you to be a witness”
Monk: “Huh? But you are already married” but then he remembers the words of the two maulanas, ‘talaaq is like nikkah’, “aah!”, he says, so he puts on his best suit and wears body spray, he takes some flowers for the joyous occasion.

Monk knocked on the door, the door knocked back. The mian bivi were engaged in haato paiyee. He knocked again. The door opened.

Wife: “Aah you are here! My sister has already arrived, she and I were doing tag team on my husband, soon to be ex.”
Husband: “You poor excuse of an awrat, who is this man?”
Wife: “Why it is Monk of course, he is here to witness our marriage I mean divorce”
Husband: “Acha?”
Monk: “Yeah that’s right. Come on I have not got all day. By the way you have a patch of hair missing from your head”
Husband: “That was her!”, he pointed at his wife’s sister. “Oh alright then, I better do it now, or they’ll make me totally gunja” He breathed in and said. "Talaaq, Talaaq … "
Wife: “Come on hurry up”
Husband: “Talaaq”, then he breathed out.
Monk: “Congrats!” He gives the flowers. “Well that’s sorted it then, I’m off”, as he begins his exit …
Ex-Wife: “Monk-e-poos, wait for me!”
Monk: “You think I’ll stick around with you now? … I’ve seen the damage you and your sister have done to your ex-huband’s hair, you’re a psycho”
Ex-Wife: "But … " her eyes well up with tears.
Monk: “Sorry lady … this is REAL LIFE!” and then he runs away, checking his pockets to make sure his wallet was still there.

The END …

[Fbi786]

@psyah

Peace Monk bhai

Islam is about making things as simple as possible. When we force it to go simpler than possible then we get something called “the way of the monk”

Real life?

Ok here is clip from your real life:

Husband: “Oi, why don’t you listen to me, hein?”
Wife: “Eh, shut-up oye, I will kick you”
Husband: “You rude woman, should never have married you”
Wife: “Ulloo ki ulaad, divorce me then if you have the guts”
Husband: “I give you talaaq!”
Wife:“Wait I want witnesses”, she dials a number on her phone, “Haan, Monk darling, please come to my house, you know where it is, I want you to be a witness”
Monk: “Huh? But you are already married” but then he remembers the words of the two maulanas, ‘talaaq is like nikkah’, “aah!”, he says, so he puts on his best suit and wears body spray, he takes some flowers for the joyous occasion.

Monk knocked on the door, the door knocked back. The mian bivi were engaged in haato paiyee. He knocked again. The door opened.

Wife: “Aah you are here! My sister has already arrived, she and I were doing tag team on my husband, soon to be ex.”
Husband: “You poor excuse of an awrat, who is this man?”
Wife: “Why it is Monk of course, he is here to witness our marriage I mean divorce”
Husband: “Acha?”
Monk: “Yeah that’s right. Come on I have not got all day. By the way you have a patch of hair missing from your head”
Husband: “That was her!”, he pointed at his wife’s sister. “Oh alright then, I better do it now, or they’ll make me totally gunja” He breathed in and said. "Talaaq, Talaaq … "
Wife: “Come on hurry up”
Husband: “Talaaq”, then he breathed out.
Monk: “Congrats!” He gives the flowers. “Well that’s sorted it then, I’m off”, as he begins his exit …
Ex-Wife: “Monk-e-poos, wait for me!”
Monk: “You think I’ll stick around with you now? … I’ve seen the damage you and your sister have done to your ex-huband’s hair, you’re a psycho”
Ex-Wife: "But … " her eyes well up with tears.
Monk: “Sorry lady … this is REAL LIFE!” and then he runs away, checking his pockets to make sure his wallet was still there.

The END …

OK This IS Genius ..Cudnt be Put better in simplest of words .. to Monks level of understand on the Issue ..

I bet MonK is going to remember this dialogue next time hes invited to a ‘talaq’ ceremony

[firenze]

hahahaha.. oh my gosh … classy…

thanks for the laugh.. psyah .. ..

@psyah

Peace Monk bhai

Islam is about making things as simple as possible. When we force it to go simpler than possible then we get something called “the way of the monk”

Real life?

Ok here is clip from your real life:

Husband: “Oi, why don’t you listen to me, hein?”
Wife: “Eh, shut-up oye, I will kick you”
Husband: “You rude woman, should never have married you”
Wife: “Ulloo ki ulaad, divorce me then if you have the guts”
Husband: “I give you talaaq!”
Wife:“Wait I want witnesses”, she dials a number on her phone, “Haan, Monk darling, please come to my house, you know where it is, I want you to be a witness”
Monk: “Huh? But you are already married” but then he remembers the words of the two maulanas, ‘talaaq is like nikkah’, “aah!”, he says, so he puts on his best suit and wears body spray, he takes some flowers for the joyous occasion.

Monk knocked on the door, the door knocked back. The mian bivi were engaged in haato paiyee. He knocked again. The door opened.

Wife: “Aah you are here! My sister has already arrived, she and I were doing tag team on my husband, soon to be ex.”
Husband: “You poor excuse of an awrat, who is this man?”
Wife: “Why it is Monk of course, he is here to witness our marriage I mean divorce”
Husband: “Acha?”
Monk: “Yeah that’s right. Come on I have not got all day. By the way you have a patch of hair missing from your head”
Husband: “That was her!”, he pointed at his wife’s sister. “Oh alright then, I better do it now, or they’ll make me totally gunja” He breathed in and said. "Talaaq, Talaaq … "
Wife: “Come on hurry up”
Husband: “Talaaq”, then he breathed out.
Monk: “Congrats!” He gives the flowers. “Well that’s sorted it then, I’m off”, as he begins his exit …
Ex-Wife: “Monk-e-poos, wait for me!”
Monk: “You think I’ll stick around with you now? … I’ve seen the damage you and your sister have done to your ex-huband’s hair, you’re a psycho”
Ex-Wife: "But … " her eyes well up with tears.
Monk: “Sorry lady … this is REAL LIFE!” and then he runs away, checking his pockets to make sure his wallet was still there.

The END …

[firenze]

@Fbi786

OK This IS Genius ..Cudnt be Put better in simplest of words .. to Monks level of understand on the Issue ..

I bet MonK is going to remember this dialogue next time hes invited to a ‘talaq’ ceremony

bechara.. monk.. ..

[Monk]

I just gave up this discussion.

Just like I gave up going jumah-khutbahs.

Enjoy

[hassanzaman]

Re: Talaq and nikah

thankss