Re: take offense?
silsila: Thats great you have 2 degrees...I will have 2 degrees when I finish this one! I believe that education and having good career important too!
My sisters MIL gave her money to get all her walima clothes, jewellery and hubbys clothes from pakistan too.
Re: take offense?
i wonder what will happen on EID! LOL, my mum has bought me the most amazing suit, its black with diamantes and pearls!
you have taken my quotes out of context, my taste and theirs is worlds apart - but regardless of taste, it would be nice if ppl esp sis in laws genuinely complimented u!
I treated my sisters to having there hair and make up done, im not rich but worked and saved damn hard for my wedding, I paid for everything, because I wanted specific things for me and my family and for my special day. Plus my sisters had never had full make up and hairstyles before and its something I gifted to them - so when ppl saw them they were suprised as we are simple girls. I saved for over 3 years to buy all the things i dreamt of........but my sis in laws didnt like the fact that my sisters had gorgoeus clothes/hair/make up......but why.....its down to personal choice, y hate on someone who wants to do it? Its easy to be nice then nasty.
my sis in laws aren;t short of money, but would rather someone else buy them something expensive rather than forking out for themselves............but i am different, if u want something, ppl can work hard and get it. its up to th person if thats what they want to do, its all about choice! I never said there is anything wrong with what they do, but why hate on someone who works hard to get the luxuries in life for themselves and family.
Reading your posts (this one and the previous one) I couldnt help wondering, you mentioned, how you planned everything from both sides MA and you made ur sis wear specific designer outfits and have prof makeup .. but how come you didnt suggest the same (nice outfits and prof makeup) for ur SILs .. ? Maybe its what "hurt" them. That they lack experience (perhaps taste too) and you did it all for ur sis, but not them? After all ur hubby could have paid for them or they could have paid themselves .. Not neccesarily you paying na ..
About the topic: I dont think it all bottles down to jealousy when one doesnt compliment another. After all giving someone a compliment requires a good selfconfident and self esteem. Not everyone is capable of complimenting, for some of us it may not seem as a big deal, but for some it is. I find it childish to claim whoever doesnt compliments you is jealous or just hates you for no reason.
Re: take offense?
I agree with you sweetmoi. My inlaws donot compliment people alot but thats in their nature, that doesnt mean my mil is jealous of me. Even myself, sometimes I compliment, sometimes I dont, depends what my mood is. But noway am I jealous of anyone, I hate that word.
Silsila: Yes, I even think that maybe your SIL did get upset you know. Also how do you know that you SIL didnt like the fact that your sisters had gorgeous clothes, makeup? Did they tell you?
Re: take offense?
^yes compliments are so different from ppl till people. I have a very close friend and she is not the type to compliment people often. But often at a wedding or something else, she will give you a biggo smile and we all know its her way of complimenting .. Personally I'm not a big complimenter either .. I might compliment you once in a blue moon .. It def. doesnt mean I'm turning green each time I see you in a new outfit :p u know ...
Although I would say Silsila's SILs should have complimented her on the wedding. Its almost a must to do..
in posts u cant write the full story lol...........yes i did offer.......everything to them...............we all went to pakistan together.........both families! But they felt places such as Think Pink etc were too over priced, but also knew stuff in the UK is as expensive but quality not the same. Thats y i know its down to personal choice and being able to open ur wallet. My sis in laws took alot of money for thier wedding shopping, as she told me, but wouldnt buy an outfit like that for herself, she even pestered her mum to buy her one, but her mum said if u want it, get it ur self!
they didnt even buy there own brothers sherwani for his barat etc, so his mum told me to do this, I also did there invites, menus etc, i did involve them in the process, but they just were not really bothered.............but when invites were made they were showing off at how great they were. all of there family still say if it wasnt for your daughter in law u wouldnt have had a wedding.
my husband knows his sisters (apart from esldest) are lazy, so he told me in advance that I would be doing most of the stuff, but i didnt mind as I was in control! But if ur lazy why hate on those who are proactive and just get on with it..........! Even still at my sis in laws walima I did everything, i did table decs, stage, favours, wedding cake! But still no compliment despite ppl saying this is all down to Silsila only! I did my own hair make up at her walima, and whilst i was rinning around doing the tbales, picking up the cake, they were all in the salon getting there hair and make up done! Ironic I know! But it just shows the depths of ppl!
After all giving someone a compliment requires a good selfconfident and self esteem. Not everyone is capable of complimenting, for some of us it may not seem as a big deal, but for some it is.
I dunno about that, I can give compliments (sincere ones not fake crap) but i wudtn say i have self confidence and lotta self esteem
One thign i dont get abt some ppl , is that if u compliment something....... they take it as ur hating on something else???? like my friend prefers one restaurant over another...but not just that, she will insult the other one for some petty reason..or if i compliment someone else's jora and they say "no urs is nice too" but in a way that it implies they're thinking i'm fishing for compliments cz i hate my own stuff??
Re: take offense?
At the end of the day it all comes down to how happy and satisfied you are with youself and the relationship you and your husband share to give a hoot about what anyone esle has to say about you.
Alhamdullilah my in laws are great people but I just could not live with them as their..well...let's just say "different." We moved out and I share a good relationship with them at a distance.
My MIL and SIL and even FIL have complimented me in front and behind me( I have been told lol) so that was never really an issue for me but even if they never said anything nice honestly the only person's opinion that would matter to me would be my hubby's!
in posts u cant write the full story lol...........yes i did offer.......everything to them...............we all went to pakistan together.........both families! But they felt places such as Think Pink etc were too over priced, but also knew stuff in the UK is as expensive but quality not the same. Thats y i know its down to personal choice and being able to open ur wallet. My sis in laws took alot of money for thier wedding shopping, as she told me, but wouldnt buy an outfit like that for herself, she even pestered her mum to buy her one, but her mum said if u want it, get it ur self!
they didnt even buy there own brothers sherwani for his barat etc, so his mum told me to do this, I also did there invites, menus etc, i did involve them in the process, but they just were not really bothered.............but when invites were made they were showing off at how great they were. all of there family still say if it wasnt for your daughter in law u wouldnt have had a wedding.
my husband knows his sisters (apart from esldest) are lazy, so he told me in advance that I would be doing most of the stuff, but i didnt mind as I was in control! But if ur lazy why hate on those who are proactive and just get on with it..........! Even still at my sis in laws walima I did everything, i did table decs, stage, favours, wedding cake! But still no compliment despite ppl saying this is all down to Silsila only! I did my own hair make up at her walima, and whilst i was rinning around doing the tbales, picking up the cake, they were all in the salon getting there hair and make up done! Ironic I know! But it just shows the depths of ppl!
Thats all I was wondering about. I think its really nice of you :) Now can you plz come and do my wedding too when its time :D lolz
Re: take offense?
ha ha lol where are you based!