Aside from the things that have already been mentioned -
Heavy plain 22kt gold jewelry...if there are no stones or enamel or anything to add some color it just looks like you went shopping in Mr. T's jewelry box.
That has long been a dream of mine.
Small hoop shaped nose rings (esp. with the chair to the hair...even worse if its plain gold) - I don't like nose rings in general, but I HATE, HATE, HATE these...they look like something you'd see on a buffalo.
That's insulting to buffaloes.
Bridal entrances choreographed to a CD of the latest bollywood hit song. Acutally, having a DJ in general is pretty tacky.
Bridal entrances are tacky, by default; I'd sooner put a saddle on my back and let the groom ride me into the hall while screaming “Yee-haw!”.
Other tacky things from desi weddings... Obviously pre-folded looking turbans for the groom (for some reason, this seems to be more of a problem with Indian turbans than Pakistani ones)
I thought those were the only kind! You mean you have to fold them yourself?!?
Ripping the groom's shoes off. Especially if he's wearing a suit with lace-up shoes.
But won't you have to do this, on your wedding night? Or do you rip off the suit first and let him keep the shoes on (to be kinky)?
Napkins folded into a fan shape and stuffed inside the water glasses
I mean, I would prefer water, but it's not that difficult to take them out...
Toasts with water, soda or other non-alcoholic beverages.
Absolutely. If that champagne flute doesn't contain at least a ½ ounce of Cristal, it's more of an insult than a toast.
"Flower arrangements" consisting of a single rose and some baby's breath in a cheap looking vase.
At the end of the night, though, they're easier to steal.
Guests who put napkins on their heads when the Nikkah is being read.
Is this the Muslim equivalent of putting a lampshade on your head when you're drunk?
"Theme" weddings. Peacock, "Mughal," "Umrao Jaan"...its all tacky.
Umrao Jaan?!? Where was this wedding being held?!? The Hira Mandi?!?