salam everyone!
im v v confused nowadays and need ur suggestions.
actually im confused between 2 proposals. let me tell u abt myself first. im educated as having bachelors degree and belong to upper middle class.
Rishta 1) family is v nice. we wanted inlaws to b like us and they r like us.they live in a posh area of khi having their own banglow and a car. boy is v goodlooking and v decent. he really loves me sincerely and wants to marry me.they came through sum refrence and its not going to be love marriage. it will be an arrange marriage. guy looked at me 1st time n fell in love so deeply dont knw why as im not so much pretty.his mom keeps on telling my mom that he really likes her alot n wants to marry her. but the problem is he is just bcom as his mom is saying.. he could b inter as well. and he is earning just 20,000pkr. atleast they didnt lie abt his salary and education. he is planing to move dubai for settling himself. his education and sAlary stop me from marrying him.
2) rishta 2:
family is just lower middle class or may be middle class. they live in a very very bad reputed area of karachi. but guy lives in jauhar with his married brother. he is an average looking boy with very ordinary family background. he has lived his 25 years in a v bad reputed area of khi. but he is educated As he has done bsc and masters. im not much attracted to him. he doesnt has his own house nor he has father’s house. currently he is working in egypt in company and earning 295,000 pkr.
im v v confused between these two. dnt knw what to do. i wanted to have a guy who must be educated and earning a good money but he and his family should also be like us. family background matters to me alot what should i do? or should i wait for the wait 3rd one?
all the things u told in 1st rishta seems very nice.
All the things in 2nd rishta are very disappointing.
the way u sound MSc looks under B.com so the only thing is confusing you ----> 295000-20000=275000 per month
thats huge difference. Ever heard of NPV? go for second babe.
why would you convert salary in Pak Rupees? if he makes money in a foreign land, he has to live and spend there. when you convert money in another currency, it seems a lot but it isn't.
a salary of Rs. 100,000 / 1 lac a month sounds a lot of money in Pakistan but if you make this much money in Canada [equivalent to CAD 1000] is not even enough to live on in Canada.
tough decision. Are you in a huge rush to get married? Marriage is a life long commitment and should never be taken lightly. Go with your gut feeling, that inner voice that's panicking right now. attraction does matter as much as people say "you will become attracted to him after marriage even if you don't feel anything for him now"....I don't agree with that. What's the worst thing that can happen if you wait? It's a decision you have to make yourself, think long and hard because this guy will be your life partner. Do you see either of these guys like that? The two things you mentioned do matter and if they are important to you now, they'll seem even more important later on after marriage.
I dont think youre ready for marriage full stop. Your shallowness astounds me. Not marrying a guy because of how much he earns?? maybe he has only just got onto the career ladder. The first guy is pouring his heart out to you. The icing on the cake is the background thing - anybody who is not upper middle class or high class is beneath you. Again, you dont sound like youre ready for marriage
So you're looking at 1) where the family lives - something that was probably not in the guy's control, but his parents' fate; and 2) his income and then 3) how hot he is.
Are you at all talking to these guys to see what their character is like and what their values are like??
OP, Can you mind telling which bad reputed area are you referring to?
in what sense the area is bad reputed or it is only an area where low to middle income group people resides and you are terming that as bad area on that account??
Any how, you must see how the family is, people living in bad areas are not necessarily bad people, check out their value system, their uthna bethna, bol chaal etc.
Also, it should not matter much where the guy had lived before, there are many people who belong to lower income families and then with their hard work and smartness climb the social ladder. Since now you say the guy is making good money, he can progress towards a better lifestyle that might also include a home in a better neighborhood.
whether you decide on the first guy or the second guy, but do give some thoughts on other points like character, values,overall personality, age in relevance to stage in career( like if the first guy who is making 20k and if he is already in his 30's then that pretty disappointing, if he is into his early 20's and has just begun his career then you can say that some people start small but in 3-4 years can get to a better place).
if i were in your situation, i'd wait. If for saying sake, i couldn't wait, #1 would be the option i'd feel less uncomfortable with given the limited info you shared.
There is something fishy about number 1, no upper middle class person in this day and age, does a job of Rs /20,000. I am paying our live in maasi 20,000 per month currently. And how do u know he really loves u? And his mom is not making it up? R u sure it's their house and not a rented one.
salam everyone!
im v v confused nowadays and need ur suggestions.
actually im confused between 2 proposals. let me tell u abt myself first. im educated as having bachelors degree and belong to upper middle class.
Rishta 1) family is v nice. we wanted inlaws to b like us and they r like us.they live in a posh area of khi having their own banglow and a car. boy is v goodlooking and v decent. he really loves me sincerely and wants to marry me.they came through sum refrence and its not going to be love marriage. it will be an arrange marriage. guy looked at me 1st time n fell in love so deeply dont knw why as im not so much pretty.his mom keeps on telling my mom that he really likes her alot n wants to marry her. but the problem is he is just bcom as his mom is saying.. he could b inter as well. and he is earning just 20,000pkr. atleast they didnt lie abt his salary and education. he is planing to move dubai for settling himself. his education and sAlary stop me from marrying him.
2) rishta 2:
family is just lower middle class or may be middle class. they live in a very very bad reputed area of karachi. but guy lives in jauhar with his married brother. he is an average looking boy with very ordinary family background. he has lived his 25 years in a v bad reputed area of khi. but he is educated As he has done bsc and masters. im not much attracted to him. he doesnt has his own house nor he has father's house. currently he is working in egypt in company and earning 295,000 pkr.
im v v confused between these two. dnt knw what to do. i wanted to have a guy who must be educated and earning a good money but he and his family should also be like us. family background matters to me alot :( what should i do? or should i wait for the wait 3rd one? :(
LOL...seriously?
Okay jokes aside, guy number one seems like he ticks most of your boxes so go for him perhaps?
for upper middle class, option one, the boy doesnt seem educated worth anything. and 20,000? If you are upper middle class, I guess you would know how much you are paying your hired help. Does sound fishy to line up the education you say he has with his family background.
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. guy looked at me 1st time n fell in love so deeply dont knw why as im not so much pretty
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The above is so ridiculous sounding to me. Kindly use your own head when it comes to this decision. I really want to know that if they are well off enough how come the boy isn't educated. Why didn't they use those funds to educate him?
what should i do? or should i wait for the wait 3rd one?