[Split Thread] The Joint Family System

[Deeba1234]

Re: [Split Thread] The Joint Family System

@Princess1983

From my experience of watching the whole match making situ (arranged marriages) no one hardly mentions what the DIL will be doing after the marriage unlike my situation whereby it was brought up that I was raised in an environment where even Mehrem Uncles knocked on before entering a house so it was something that was asked for and was agreed to by my in-laws. They then reversed their decision.

So even if someone talks about it beforehand it’s not always something that can be executed afterwards.

Personally though if someone arranges their child’s marriage into a family where for example there are say three brothers and the older two are living with their parents and are married the girls family SHOULD ask what the set up will be for their daughter if they are aware of their daughters desire not to live in such circumstances.

I’ve seen a few families brush things like this under the carpet as they were simply looking for ‘good family, educated boy’ and married off their daughters without hesitation and said stuff like ‘oh afterwards it can be fixed’. Erm how?

I find this so strange..

Before marriage most parents are so paranoid about their daughters spending a single night away from home but they don’t seem to care about where she’ll be living after marriage (or are too embarrassed to ask or scared the daughter will be rejected?)..

What jobs the boy’s uncles and aunts do or which village his grandparents come from is ok to talk about but not future living arrangements