hugs always right!!! I’ve started admiring you - 
Just a qustion that often passes thru my mind and makes me think abt it very seriously, takes me hrs n hrs to reach to some conclusion but have hardly reached to any... today I thought why not to listen to some different opinions on it:
I know that the best age for a girl to get married is around 20-25. You can say its ideal age for her to get settled in her home and life.
But I know, now days its not the case. So many gals, so many on GS, including me has crossed 25, some are on the verge of 30 and some even has crossed that limit too.
Now question: though you all want to get married, its natural desire, a need, and a dream of every gal from the time she attains maturity,
but have you ever thought or prepare yourself for what if it never happens in your life?????
What if you have to live your life all alone ???
What if you ll not get the chance to rejoice all those relations i.e. wife, motherhood, own family, your home, to have someone special, whom you can call you own, in your life which are obviously only attached to marriage ?
Are you ready to live that kind of life?
There is this reality that not all girls get marry, some remain unmarried for their entire lives. I have seen some examples in my own family.
Ever thought about this issue in this way ?
Marriage is a very personal choice depending on how ready one feels mentally to enter into a sharing relationship. Those who remain unmarried, i shall assume, do so by choice because that’s the way of life they prefer over married one. This could be shaped by experiences of people around them, their own personalities, preference for career or just not enough faith in the institution of marriage bringing much happiness to them. At the end of the day each individual is different and so are her needs, wants and desires and her way of managing each :) As long as an individual is happy either being single, married, divorced, unmarried, it doesn’t really matter and yes am assuming they are mentally ready to take on life that way.
Re: Specifically for Unmarried Girls...
Oh well I didnt mean the gals/ladies who deliberately wants to stay single. Of course that would be their choice how they want to live their lives. My point was when you want to get marry but you cannot coz luck is not on yourside. I have seen many many and many very nice girls who couldnt find a good proposal and reached to a stage where they didnt have either much choice to make when a proposal came or proposal stopped coming at all. These are the gals who really wanted to get married but taqdeer ne saath nahin diya.
I personally would dread that situation.
I reckon, for girls who wants to settle down in life by marrying to someone , or who had been dreaming to have her own home and family, it would be a readly hard to live alone. I know if this is what fate has chosen for you, then of course you will look for outlets , activities, adopting orphans etc. But still one cannot deny the need of a man and marriage in one's life. It is a need for sure and its a Natural need. Its not about one thing but its about so many things which are related to this relationship.
"Man or marriage should not be a need" easier said than done. Marriage is a need, man is a need for woman and vice versa. This need was felt by Allah too hence created Hawa to acompany Adam.
I no where mean to say that for the sake of marriage, marry just any man. No One should not be that frustrated about it. I dont mean to make life a living hell.
I wish no man and no woman have to live a lonely life. Partnership is important and indispensable for both.
Originally Posted by Tayyebeh http://www.paklinks.com/gs/images/buttons/viewpost.gif
*So I’m not a cute girl :(???
What if the proposal looks great first, you do istheekhara everything seems fine, you get married and he turns into a ******? Mistreats you, misbehaves with you etc. You get pregnant cannot continue to study etc. are left with no money? Couldn’t possibly provide for yourself? Then what is a girl supposed to do?
my frnds in the exc same situation..she married her high skool sweetheart so never thought hed turn out this way..she married wen she ws 20
i learnt from her mistake big time…!!!
Re: Specifically for Unmarried Girls...
When you are a teenager, or in early 20s, you should listen to what parents say. These high school loves etc all are BS and not based on even 1% logics.
But once you cross or enter late 20s then your say / opinion in marriage becomes crucial. And parents should not just impose their decision on you.
Re: Specifically for Unmarried Girls...
i tell u a story.
i come from a village and i spent half of my life in village in india doing nothing, not even going to school. so, life-style and life-expectations for me was totally different than those of the masses. i fast tracked my education and my bro was in the US doing his PhD, then he landed a teaching position in Canada and thats when he helped me immigrate to canada.
As a result, i was catapulted from a village in India to a huge metropolis [Toronto]. i had no idea how to handle this change. for me gals were soemone who are unapproachable, especiallly the goris. so now, i just crossed 30 and i'm well setteled in lief with a good job but unable to connect to persons of the opposite sex to get married and start a meaningful life. so, here i'm ready to accept a single's life...and it ain't so bad so far. atleast, i've ma freedom hahaha lol ;)
Re: Specifically for Unmarried Girls…
At this stage in life, I’m fully focused on my education & plans of my future career. I don’t really think about getting married as such, because I believe it’ll happen in the future when it feels right to. If it doesn’t for some reason, well I don’t really want to leave my parents house anyway 
To be honest, I agree with PSquared..
:k:
Re: Specifically for Unmarried Girls...
Asalam O Laikam this is my first post to this forum.
I had just turned 16 when I got marriad so GCSE was the end of my education kinda do miss not been able to finish my studies but not complaining.
Re: Specifically for Unmarried Girls...
Psquared said it perfectly
Asalam O Laikam this is my first post to this forum.
I had just turned 16 when I got marriad so GCSE was the end of my education kinda do miss not been able to finish my studies but not complaining.
You can still think about doing your Alevels at college if you were interested? I know that the government has a higher learning scheme in place at the moment which means that if you havnt done any higher qualifications (alevels or degree) post GCSES then it is free for you too! You would have to ask at a local college for further information though. Maybe think about it - just as a hobby? I know there are loads of courses out at the moment - if you aren't interested in academic, there are vocational ones too, language classes and also activities.
If you are any good - you could try to do an Alevel in Urdu? Interpreting is quite good fun.
You know, this kind of break is probably even good for you, because a lot of people are not even mature enough in their Alevels.. they don't appreciate what they are doing...
I hope I am not being pushy, these are just some ideas that came into mind when I read your post :)
Re: Specifically for Unmarried Girls…
I think you guys have all read / seen bridget jones?
The sad fact is, that there aren’t as amazing men as there are women. Therefore the good ones literally get snapped up earlier (ie unis, schools, friends of friends) at relatively young ages by more intelligent/lucky women.
You will find dozens of capable, intelligent, bright, funny, beautiful, kind hearted single women approaching their thirties and beyond - whilst the men are usually not up par..
This is why its smarter for a girl to start looking at a younger age.
This rule applied across to board - I am sure those of us in the West know of desperate white women who are keen to settle down as soon as someone will have them?
This isn’t a desi problem.
So far as never getting married is concerned. I am no longer young enough to have the confidence in my own company. I hope I do find somebody. So far as being educated and able is concerned - not many guys worth their salt will invest in a woman who isn’t up to their own standards anyway.
So its kinda like, you’re dead if you don’t in both instances.
O look at me. I just wrote a book 
I think you guys have all read / seen bridget jones?
The sad fact is, that there aren't as amazing men as there are women. Therefore the good ones literally get snapped up earlier (ie unis, schools, friends of friends) at relatively young ages by more intelligent/lucky women.
truth.
Re: Specifically for Unmarried Girls...
^ I agree with Hitchki. Well said.
You can still think about doing your Alevels at college if you were interested? I know that the government has a higher learning scheme in place at the moment which means that if you havnt done any higher qualifications (alevels or degree) post GCSES then it is free for you too! You would have to ask at a local college for further information though. Maybe think about it - just as a hobby? I know there are loads of courses out at the moment - if you aren't interested in academic, there are vocational ones too, language classes and also activities.
If you are any good - you could try to do an Alevel in Urdu? Interpreting is quite good fun.
You know, this kind of break is probably even good for you, because a lot of people are not even mature enough in their Alevels.. they don't appreciate what they are doing...
I hope I am not being pushy, these are just some ideas that came into mind when I read your post :)
thankyou for that id love to learn urdu but i only know how to speak it
.
Great Post !