Re: So what do you do if husband doesn’t like your hijab
that’s very scary. :hinna:
Re: So what do you do if husband doesn't like your hijab
Yeh it is...
With that note
I Pray Allah hum sabko Naik Hadayat aur Akirah mai Jannat deh
Punishment for leaving prayar is so big...Like a python snake wraps u and bites u every minute in ur grave..
iv have to go now..
bye
Re: So what do you do if husband doesn't like your hijab
Its one thing to see your wife in hijab and another entirely to live with her daily life that is immersed in religious activities.
I dont think its a big deal but I bet the guy feels like he has nothing in common with her because they're no longer a couple. What is a couple? Two people, married who live a life together, share things, raise a family, etc. I dont see them sharing anything. Her religious activities are her life and her interests. She has left him behind and moved forward...that is what is causing the imbalance here.
Part of religion is caring for your family and making sure your home life is taken care of. She can be involved in ten volunteer activities but what kind of an example is she setting by letting her home go? Nope. She needs to cut back, loosen up, involve him in her life and BE involved in HIS.
If he has agreed for counseling...there is hope.
They need to go out more, spend more time together, she needs to pay attention to herself and remind him of who he fell in love with and married. Furthermore, I believe him joining her every so often in her activities is a great idea as well as her having his friends over now and again for a dinner at their home.
My two cents. :)
Re: So what do you do if husband doesn't like your hijab
maybe she should try concentrating on her hubby more than other activities? make him feel a bit more loved and her first priority?
we all have religious obligations... but if things are going bad at home, then whats the point? where's our Islamic duty to our spouse?
Ive seen it happen to someone here... although they are a much much older couple with grown up kids.... this feeds down into the kids.. and it aint good
Re: So what do you do if husband doesn't like your hijab
yeh i agree with the above posts. i know many people who suddenly become religious which yes is a good thing, but then they think they are superior and are always preaching on at others for this n that and the other. i know my aunt is constantly tutting and tsking and making remarks about whatever she thinks is not muslim enough.....and it does get annoying, when you become more religious your meant to be change in other ways too not just preaching and passing judgjment. if the wife is doing this then :{
but if its a case of the man just being ashamed of having a pardah wife then maybe its his problem and not hers...
i dnt think we have heard her side, all u say is his side that he feels judged what does she say..maybe shes tried her best but its just HIM who feels embarrased....
Re: So what do you do if husband doesn't like your hijab
does she cover her face.....i dont think thats a mandatory requirement is it...?
Re: So what do you do if husband doesn’t like your hijab
show him the following video
Re: So what do you do if husband doesn't like your hijab
^ as wonderful as that video is, it's not quite teaching the right thing... no? maybe its just me..
Re: So what do you do if husband doesn't like your hijab
i have another idea. get nekkid.
Re: So what do you do if husband doesn't like your hijab
To say that he doesnt like her hijaab is one thing - but it seems like he doesnt like HER anymore - he's reverting to a place where he feels free and less obligated to do anything about their marriage or even address the issues anymore.
I know that sometimes women get sooo engulfed in religion and classes etc that family is kinda left behind - my mom personally knew someone whose marriage ended because of the wife paying soo much attention to the religion portion he was the one who ended up doing everything for the kids and the house on top of his job!
at the same time - if its jst abt the hijaab then im sure they can reach some sort of compromise.. but if its more than that than they definitely need to sit down and figure this out - if not for the sake of themselves then maybe for the kids (if they have any)
Re: So what do you do if husband doesn't like your hijab
grown apart apparently and it happens. if neither is interested in making it work then may be separation for a while is the best route to take. it may help them prioritise their activities in relation to eachother.
Re: So what do you do if husband doesn't like your hijab
Let me ask you something Nikki...is it possible the wife doesnt know her husband anymore and simply feels uncomfortable around him herself? We women have a tendency to fill voids in our marriages with endless activities so we dont have to face realities of life.
Re: So what do you do if husband doesn't like your hijab
^ it could be both ways. Im assuming the story is from the girl's side rather than the guys... nahin?
he may be trying to fill a void too...?
Re: So what do you do if husband doesn't like your hijab
Yes you are right on track. He has admitted feeling odd around her. He doesn't feel like being near her. But he's a man with needs yes.
I don't know what came first. His other activities and her passion toward religion or her involvement and his repulsion.
Re: So what do you do if husband doesn't like your hijab
^ do they have kids?
have they tried taking time away from their other activities and just going somewhere? just the two of them? has she maybe asked what he may like to do?
most of the time, in a relationship, we just assume things are going ok, and we dont stop to ask what the other may be wanting.... we should really. Just stop, sit down and just ask what they would like to do to make things better....
Re: So what do you do if husband doesn't like your hijab
They have kids yes. And they have tried in the past to solve things. Thing got better and then bad again.
But there is hope.
Re: So what do you do if husband doesn't like your hijab
can she try maybe for awhile just not going to all these extra curricular activities to see if that helps? maybe take a small vacation and see how things pan out...
Re: So what do you do if husband doesn't like your hijab
I agree with PSquared.
Wife has become extreme, alienating husband. Husband doesn't want to be extreme, so is heading in the opposite direction.
Middle ground. SHE SHOULD GIVE UP SOME OF HER EXTREMISM, HE SHOULD GIVE UP SOME OF HIS.
BTW, In this day and age, Niqaab draws unnecessary NEGATIVE attention in the west. Personally I don't believe that niqaab is an necessity imposed by Islam (after all, women's faces must be uncovered for tawaaf and prayers) and given the environment one has to live in, it would make life easier NOT to wear it. In my mind, niqaab can create barriers between muslims and non-muslims, people find it frightening to see niqabi's and this fear can generate hurtful behaviour.
I wear hijaab myself, and have not come across any significant negative attitudes, except once or twice from moody teenage kids, not adults, and judging by your posts, this man has been able to live perfectly happily with a hijabi wife and go out with her without probs, is this correct?
Sometimes my husband goes to the mosque and listens to an Islamic lecture given there, comes back all excited and happy that he has learnt something that brings him closer to his deen, all well and good, but I struggle when he tells me the speech giver taught them xyz is the only way you can pray or what have you, when in reality one can utilize one's own judgement and weigh up that there are other options. I wonder if the husband in this case is struggling bcos his wife is being sucked into something hehas no control over?
Re: So what do you do if husband doesn’t like your hijab
^ I concur with the majority of your post RH.
So you’re not just full of intellect regarding cheese and crackers.. 