Our generation is all about romance, love, excitement, passion, intimacy and so many other things that our parents dont seem to get.
The thing is, a woman’s heart is a woman’s heart…regardless of the age, time, era or expectations. What a 25 year old girl expects from her husband in the 1940’s cant be all that different from what a girl in 2010 wants? Or can it?
The ummeedein that we have of married life and our partners…do you think our parents had the same? Our mothers wanted the same things?
Hmmm I think our parent’s generation had far greater umeedain than us from their spouses. People were much more humble and kind and hence more caring. I wish I was born in 1950’s :hinna:
But I think mothers had lesser say when it was about children. It was only dads who could decide upon school , profession and even marriages. But now that many new mothers are professional themselves they are involved in most of the decision. Not even working moms but stay home well educated moms have a broader vision and knowledge and thus they have a say .
Reha, u talking about our parents generation or older generation?
I think their version of love was a lot more simpler… like maybe their husbands giving them a bit of attention, a few gifts here and there… and i belive some of us are still like that. Unless we’re exposed to other types of romantic stuff… we dont want it. Does that make sense?
Now, we want to spend more time being a couple… more intimate and passionate time… but maybe thats cus we’re living in a society where its deemed quite necessary to have a relationship like that with ones spouse..
if i speak of my relos back in pakistan, who are of the same age… who got married around the same time as I… their version of love and romance will be quite different. Heck, if i wasnt married to my husband, I would have been different too… dunno
For once I disagree with you lol. I think their generation was all about Romance. Look at the difference between Romantic movies from the black and white days, the 70’s, 80’s, early 90’s and look at the movies now. Today’s movies involve less romance and more comedy which often revolves around cheating husbands.
I also feel that people are much more open about the facts of life such as sex, drugs, entertainment, than they were before. It feels like there is so much more to concentrate on. Most people are working full time, going to school, are constantly on their phones, watching TV, listening to music, and they have forgotten about the simple pleasures in life.
I miss the good old days when men were supposed to chivalrous and would do anything for their love. Nowadays a man’s response to his mistake is “If you wanna leave than leave”, and will be with another chick within a month, and even that is a stretch lol.
I think women nowadays want romance, but don’t get it as much.
of course they had the same “umeedein” that we do…and i think those umeedien got fulfilled alot more in the older times than they do now. haven’t you seen the arts/media from that era…just watch a movie from the 60s or 70s, it all used to be so simple and straightforward. if a man loved a woman he treated her well and thats all there was to it. nowadays, media portrays men who are absolute jerks to their wives and still supposedly love them on the inside…its just that they have a hard time displaying emotion and sharing feelings. seems like men have made up so many excuses for their lazy behavior over the decades that we’ve gotten tired of expecting anything better
case in point: my dad, no matter what kinda financial situation we were in or no matter how much of a rough patch him n mom were goin through, ALWAYS got her surprise presents on her birthday n anniversary. this included flowers, jewelery, gifts, even poems!! i always thought it was embarassing and thanked god it only happened a few times a year. i have NEVER seen my mom give a gift in return. lol. now i know, that i am always under equal pressure to give my hubby an awesome gift on any occasion knowing full well that it will seem unfair if he keeps giving me stuff n i never return the love. i’ve seen in my friends that if a girl relaxes about gift-giving a lil bit the guy will take it as a hint that there’s no need for gifts or surprises in the relationship anymore. how come our dads didnt take the lack of gift recieving as a signal to stop giving also? cuz they were gentlemen and our generation boys are idiots!
edit: oops i totally just rewrote what desi beautii said without realizing it. an “i agree with above post” would’ve sufficed i guess
I guess Im talking about a generation above us. Our parents. And the funny thing is, I never thought about it the way you said it. That because it was as simpler time, expectations were simpler and more straightforward as well.
DB, I agree with you…lol. I think its true…men dont have to worry about winning love as much anymore. I think thats sad.
Soooo true.
Does this mean our generation is less likely to fall in love…like the kind of love our parents were in?
I don’t think that kind of love exists that much anymore.. my parents never saw each other before getting married and to this day my mom has this sharam from my dad.. I don’t think you see that anymore so much.. there was something very romantic in that era
When I look at my parents and review what they have gone through in their life, I see two committed individuals who set common goals and stuck to each other through thick and thin and each giving a 100% toward their family and marriage.
It’s not that we don’t see that happening anymore and I hate to make a general statement…but recently I have seen some people becoming too conscious of their rights rather than responsibilities; we’ve become too quick to point errors in the spouse or other people rather than take a moment to evaluate ourselves.
Coming to the romance part, well after being with each other for 40 years, my parents still having a spark in their eyes for each other. This generation needs external influences to keep marriage going even after a few years. Boredom sets in too fast.
how much choice did they have back than as compared to now?.. how much education…?.. how much independence…? … i m sure they have all sorts or same Umeedain OR Oomangain etc. but they were not able to fullfil them because they were just ‘stuck’ within their limited resources OR* loog kya kahain gay aur shohar ka ghar choora tou sarkoon per aa jaaon gii aur Mr Meow being Majaazi Khuda*… ..thats not the case with women these days…
Call this guy whatever you want, but he defined pure romance! I bet he never even landed a single chumma onscreen and yet came out as Pakistan’s most romantic guy! That was your parents era…
While our parents’ generation wasn’t without its problems, it seems to me that people today put more of an emphasis on “me, me, me and MY problems and MY wants and MY needs and MY way of doing things, etc.” We need to be selfish sometimes…there are instances where it’s necessary to put our well being before others’. But that selfishness has to be balanced with selflessness. Neither extreme is good.
Chal spocky kiya yaad karay ga . I agree with u . :k:
The innocent love that our earlier generations enjoyed , we don’t have that . Now everything is so open and available that it just took away all the charm .
it totally does na
my mum makes my dad’s favorite dishes and my dad dresses up the way she wants him 2 b, my mum always ask us not 2 do any thing which makes our dad unhappy and my dad asks the same frm us for our mum
may b the ppl of that age didn’t needed much assurance due to the level of trust they had
The world has changed in the last 30-40 years. Maybe more so than it has ever changed in a similar period. With it, people’s perceptions, needs, fears and expectations have also changed. It is because of these changes that today, in some ways, life is harder, and in some ways it’s easier. Any sort of comparison isn’t really valid.
Romance may or may not lead to physical act but not every physical act begins with or need romance.
Older generation had romance or romantic expectations without really going in to thinking of physical relationship,… newer generation mostly expect when and how the unnecessary romance will be over and physical act begins!
