Reha
April 27, 2010, 4:56pm
65
It’s pretty dangerous to make generalizations about saas-bahu relationships. The reality is that there are some MIL (or other ILs) who are tyrants. But there are other bahus who are *itches. Each family and each relationship is different.
The dysfunctional relationship arises when either the bahu or the ILs (including the husband) fail to treat each other with the same respect and consideration they accord their own blood relations. First of all it should not be about rishta nibhana - that sounds as if kissi aur pey ehsaan kiya jaraha hai. Agar dono taraf khuloos aur mohabat ho (we we show to strangers more readily then our own families), then that should allow the family to overcome any issues or conflicts - since no family is perfect.
The whole “I’m not obligated to do anything since Islam doesn’t require” puts the discussion into the context of I’m doing a favour to someone else showing them courtesy since the religion doesn’t require it.
I think husband and wife should appreciate each other for taking care of their inlaws…its not an ehsaan but it is something no one is required to do. Especially the wife.