So he hit me.....advise now.

[Jolie]

Re: So he hit me…advise now.

@DaffyDuck

The issue is not whether living in Pakistan or living in UK is better. The problem is Nadz was born in UK and has lived there ever since - you always have adjustment issues when you live in a new place. No matter how much Pakistanis deny that they are living a beautiful life abroad, at the start they all had tough times .. many worked at tills, as conductors, as sweepers etc. and missed their families. Its natural for her to feel what she is feeling since she wasnt born & brought up here.

I would still say to every one - Please do not suggest ideas like separation & divorce on conclusions based on 500 words text Nadz writes here. Allah hates divorces and we here do not have enough information to suggest to any one no matter what. Really a push and a bottle throwing anger incident should become the reason for such a calamity? Really its shameful for those who are suggesting it. Even if you feel they are on the verge of a break, be a good third party and suggest reconciliation no matter what! For God’s sake they have 2 kids.. one who hasn’t even been born!! I fail to understand how convenient it is for every one to use the word of separation. Do you guys even know the repercussions of it? Every one has heard just one side of the story and suggested they go their ways .. really .. is that enough proof for any one?
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I am just amazed at how trivial, normal, minute natured the word “divorce” is for people here! arghhh! **

Why cry all shock, horror over this word? Because of such attitude in our community lot of people ruin their lives by staying stuck in a relationship that brings them no happiness but all drama in the world. Our women would rather stay stuck in a frustrated, miserable and bitter relationship than seek separation to find peace. Islam doesn’t tell you that you have to beaten to death to consider this option, there are many examples where Prophet pbuh himself advised divorce/separation as a solution to lot of problematic and unhappy marriages that were brought to his attention. And NO I did not base my suggestion on her 500 words post, like i said I’ve been reading about her marriage since the beginning. Dig up her old threads (from the time she was in UK) and you won’t find much difference between the feelings and attitude she has towards her husband. Something tells me that the marriage is based on some seriously messed up values and expectations.

I’m not a supporter of her divorce or separation, but just look at her attitude “work on your marriage” mantra is a just product of a “pathetic Paki mentality”. She herself sound to prepared and fine to break her marriage if she doesn’t her get way, so for me its people like her that are a great insult to sanctity of marriage. And yeah kids don’t really enjoy a happy life if they’re being raised around a really screwed up marriage. So yes if she’s prepared to end this relationship (thats what I gathered from her last post) I’d say she must have a serious thinking session now, her kids are young and damage can be very minimal to them.

The wish to live in UK means so much more than saving this marriage or being a companion to her husband. Right Nadz?