snotty looks from desi girls

Arts & Culture Culture, Arts, Literature & Linguistics
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i can smell a phadda coming in this thread… i don’t know about other Cdn uni’s, but at mine, SOME desi girls have this thing about dressing up. Now this past week here in my lil Canadian city, the weather has been really nice Masha’Allah (today is an exception, it’s snowing). But it went upto +20 - for us, that’s like summer. Anyhow, tau on such gorgeous days, who feels like dressing up. You go out in your khakis, baseball cap, and rough shirts, the ones you wear for mowing the lawn or cleaning the car. Anyhow, i wasn’t looking like a complete slob, but i wasn’t looking like i was destined to a glamorous dinner party either. Anywayz, i was in for a rude shock - i was at the library, and i got some snotty looks (i know i wasn’t imagining it, believe me you can’t imagine those kindof looks) from SOME (SOME, not all) of the desi girls there…who were dressed up as though pata nahin Paris kai runways pai haazir honay walay thain. People treat you so differently based upon what you are wearing. If i am comfortable with what i am wearing, and as long as my parents are okay with it, who else’s business is it ? They looked at me as though i had stepped out of a garbage container and was scrounging for food in wastebins. i absolutely loathe their judgemental attitudes.

Sorry if not all of us have the inclination to wear 6-inch stilettos and coiffe (?) our hair and manicure our nails so that we can be noticed by the kunwaray desi guys. If i want to look like a tree-hugger, that’s my right! So if there are any desi girls reading this who think they are God’s gift to earth because of their oh-so-perfect nails and matching handbag and shoes, please save your haughtiness and snottiness for someone else. Believe it or not, some of us actually come to uni to study (as unbelievable as it may sound) and not to practice being a model on a runway. Stilettos don’t suit everyone’s feet, and the thought of deliberately buying matching handbags + shoes frankly makes me want to P-U-K-E.

i am so sick of desi people judging me. Not all desi girls do this, but if you are one of those materialistc, judgemental people described above (this goes for both guys & gals), please reconsider your beliefs and your morals. Not everyone has to follow the same set of lifestyle choices as you - this goes for clothes as much as it does for personal religious beliefs. And next time you see a desi girl who is dressed “casually” to university, DO NOT assume you know her inside out.

feeling better Now hit me with the gaaliyaan.

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So what do you prefer? Manolos or Choos?

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Nadia, chances are those girls also give each other snotty looks. That's just the way some girls are. They like to eye each other up, both those who dress up and those who don't. Oh well. What can you do? Ignore it.

By the way, I would die without my ridiculous heels. :)

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lol they make me laugh, that’s all i can say

plus mehnaz is right, ignore them, if they’re are too busy playing dress up and don’t have nothing bettah to do then good for them

btw if they give u snotty looks, give it back…it’s fun :blush: or simply juz act like they don’t even exist…oh man luv the response on that one :stuck_out_tongue:

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Nadia

it appears they may be judging you just like you are judging them. you may want to puke when u think of girls buying matching shoes and handbags, they may want to puke at someone wearing messy clothes.

Why do you think that people who are interested in their appearance think they are god's gift to the world. I mean cant someone just have an interest in dressing as well as they can?

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Nadia!

Desis at the IC :rolleyes:

…is why I avoid the IC :slight_smile:

ps. If you’re where I think you are want to go make a snowman or something? :wink:

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Maybe you look better in your slacks than they do all dolled up. Ergo the snotty looks.

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[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by Fraudz: *
Nadia

it appears they may be judging you just like you are judging them. you may want to puke when u think of girls buying matching shoes and handbags, they may want to puke at someone wearing messy clothes.

Why do you think that people who are interested in their appearance think they are god's gift to the world. I mean cant someone just have an interest in dressing as well as they can?
[/QUOTE]

Just to add to this, dressing up does not necessarily mean the girl is doing it for male attention. A person could like to dress up/smart (depending on how you look at it) simply for themselves.

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Nadia dressing up is one of the most important things in the world. If you are a woman and you are not dressing up then you are doing somthing very unnatural i.e. not presenting your self to the males around you.

Women are like food. They have to smell and look good to fullfill their purpose. i hope you feel better now. Now go dress up a little bit. Goodluck! :)

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^ Is it a surprise to Gamma that he is still a virgin? :hehe:

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Jab mounh par 12 bajay hongay tu loug aisay hi dekhaingay na :smack:

Allah ne achay kapray kis leye deye hain, pehen-ney kay leye na :slight_smile:

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Nadia who knows they might be thinking you are the one trying to look all different and casual and hip with your rough shirt and khakis! Matching bags and stilettos may be taking it too far but rough shirts to uni??? You don't have to be all decked up but it's good to look presentable and tidy.
Again if you are comfortable doing that then does it really matter what anyone else says or does. Ignore them if you can.

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Girl from Quraysh, omg :hugs & hugs & hugs:

i hate the IC too, but - i have to go there to get books etc and print out stuff. Could use the computer labs in ST area, but some of my classes are closer to the IC.

ahem i make the bestest snowmen in the world :o i am up for making snowangels, tobogganing, and sledding anytime :o (i strictly refuse to grow up!).

MehnazQ and Fraudz, Thank you for your rational replies. You both are absolutely right, if a girl is dressing up, it doesn't mean she is doing it to gain a guy's attention. Many, if not most, of my desi female friends dress the same way, they dress absolutely opposite to me. i am totally fine with that, it's not for me to judge them and vice versa. i want their friendship because i like their personalities and whether they come to uni with Gucci handbags or not, i could not care less. They give me their time and their friendship, that's all i want from them.

Maybe i am judging others as well but, Allah ki qasm, everytime i get a prejudiced thought in mind - doesn't matter if it's when i see a guy wearing a yarmulke or a desi girl dressed as a model, i remind myself not to judge them. But if i am getting snotty looks from someone and i perceive those looks to be derived from their perception of who i am inside, based upon whether i am wearing a che guevara shirt and floppy sandals, then that's when i am unable to reconcile those preconceived notions. i am my own human being and Allah ki qasm i do try to battle my inner stereotypes, i do it ALL the time. If either of you knew me in real life, you would know i am not writing hollow words. Only Allah knows the truth. That's why i expect others to do it as well and not judge me if i want to dress differently.

i don't think i dress 'messy'. Do i like to dress casually? Yes. i mean it depends upon my mood. Infact, i think dressing up is good but as long as you don't look down upon others who don't. i think desi-style sarongs are the coolest things on earth, but that doesn't mean i look down on those who don't wear that.

Mehnaz, lolz... by the way, one of my sisters has stilettos too; she can't imagine wearing my flat-heeled sandals and i can't imagine wearing her stilettos. But i love her to bits all the same despite her uncomfortable taste in shoes!! :D :D (j/k)

Gamma,
>>.....i.e. not presenting your self to the males around you. **Women are like food.* They have to smell and look good to fullfill their purpose.<<*
i think you are being sarcastic? Thanks, but i have a different sense of what my "purpose" is and it doesn't involve being any Tom Dick or Harry's khana.

Code Red, Achay kapray i wear to parties and functions. For uni, i go to study. i don't mean to imply i don't wear "nice" clothes to uni. i do. But my definition of "nice" may be quite different than your definition of "nice".

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:frowning: FF, Why do you think that i automatically would look untidy? :confused: Can’t someone be dressed casually and still be looking neat and clean ?

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Rough shirt like the ones you wear while mowing a lawn...thats usually a rough one.

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**

Thanks, XChorniX :slight_smile: :slight_smile:

i can’t give snotty looks back. i feel embarassed. i lower my eyes to the ground and just walk off. Then i feel mad about it later and come on gupshup to vent my feelings out.

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Maybe we need definitions of what constitutes “rough”. i wear khaki pants and shirts - these are clothes in a condition that i would consider clean enough to wear even for namaaz because they aren’t straight out of my laundry heap of dirty clothes. It’s just not attire that would be suitable for a night out…that’s because i am not going out for the night. All i have to do is go to my classes and come home.

Sorry if i am offending anyone here :flower1: That’s really not my intention. Please forgive me if i am. Just my personal observations.

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No Nadia no offense at all :)

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it's a cruel world out there. Preconceived notions...chicks in army fatigues being called lesbians..while lipstick lesbians look like the hotties from the local sorority...

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Gamma :yukh: :rolleyes: kakay plz tell me u r joking :hoonh:

Nadz what a cute post :smiley: hugz
yaar…don’t care what looks people give you…some people seriously have nothing better to do than observe others and then make comparisons…this one time i remember i was dressed in a casual shalwaar kameez when i went to the bank, and there the customer service girls were all decked in nice clothes and wearing makeup like they were about to go to a party or something… [seriously i think they are paid to look pretty and not for their work and they spend their entire salaries on clothes and makeup] …khayr i totally felt out of place there that day and one of the girls i’m sure gave me this look like ‘uff what are you doing here’…i just shot her a nasty look like 'girllll i got better things to do than wear a CLIP, SANDALS, SHALWAAR KAMEEZ and [get this!!!] a WATCH!!! of the same color :rolleyes: woh bhee RED!! come on, who wears red to the office??? seriously some people really do go overboard :smack: