need sum advise well ok my sister is 30 years old, been married for 8 years she has worked most of her life she has everything going for her house good husband..buh she hasnt got any kids..right my mum says she needs to think about havin kids now as it has been years, she should think bout her family life now,she has worked, dun everything in her life dat she wantd to, everyone in the family is concerned by this, sayn she is running out of time, everytime my mum says sumting to her she goes off in a huff,..always jokes never takes it seriously, everyone asks me is there sumting wrong wiv her..i always say she doesnt talk to me about this stuff…when i was in pak my hubbi asked me why hasnt she got any kids..im like dunt now…thing is everyone is sayn it to my sister not my BIL.. i mean why is it always the women…i mean he cud hav a problem as well…
lately im trying to talk to her about this but she doesnt say anything, i even talk to her about my life sayn me n hubbi want this many kids and we plan to have them early this and that..in hope she will say sumting but nothing…she still acts like as if she is 20…i dunt know what to do she my sister…
thing is my hubbi’s uncle got married again as his frst wife didnt have any kids…he married a younger women so he could have kids and he did he has 2 great kids. buh the 2 wives hate each other..as they have to share him,they always arguin…im scared this might happen to my sister..i asked my mum wah i can do to help she said just concentrate on u own ife and marriage…confused…any help would be gratefull…
May be she does not want to have kids.
May be her husband does not want to have kids.
May be she cannot have kids but she does not want to share this with you.
Leave her alone as nothing you do can help in any case.
There could be several underlying reasons as to why your sister doesn't want children right now. Just support her decisions and don't get swept up in culture or fear.
And if your sisters husband is the kind of man that would do what the uncle did, she'd be better off without him.
I agree....everyone should leave them alone. Its their business, not anyone elses whether they have kids or not. And she might be able to confide in family memebers if they were more supportive.
im the one whos defends her in front of the enitre family, telling them to leave her alone its her life, she my sis i care about her thats all, it is just annoying when thats all the flippin family talk about, it gets on ur nerves im like its none of ur business, i have never pressured her into telling me everyting bout her life, like sum of the family do...
she loves kids, i mean she is practically there 24/ for our nephews and niece,,,
I think she should be POSITIVELY SUPPORTED to have kids ASAP. If there is a problem, then thats a different issue - Its later in life you realize the importance of started the family at the right time. Nothing else matters at that point.
Mom n Dad are not bugging her just because of cultural issues - they want her to have a happy life. Its ALWAYS the people that makes you happy in the end - and more specifically your family!
May be she does not want to have kids.
May be her husband does not want to have kids.
May be she cannot have kids but she does not want to share this with you.
Leave her alone as nothing you do can help in any case.
Ditto this! To all those in your family who are so concerned about her life, ask them to give one of their own kids each. I hate it when people dont have any idea whats going on with the other person's life and chaltay hain mashwaray dainay. Some ppl are just private and dont want to share these intimate details with CNN and BBC.
Ditto this! To all those in your family who are so concerned about her life, ask them to give one of their own kids each. I hate it when people dont have any idea whats going on with the other person's life and chaltay hain mashwaray dainay. Some ppl are just private and dont want to share these intimate details with CNN and BBC.
Actually I dont see why it should be a problem. I have a younger sibling who has kids and I am NOT bothered about what ppl think or say about me and my fertility!!!and neither should it be a problem for those around me.
Kids are a gift from Allah and certainly He will bless me whenever He thinks its the right time for me!!
Same goes for your sister. She doesnt need to tell everyone about her plans, wishes or perhaps infertility. She and her husband have every right to keep it private!!!
May be she likes Sex to much and she doesn't want a break.
Women have their sexual peaks in there 30s.
So leave her alone.
When is old and wrinkled and come to see your kids(cuz she don't have her own ), Then you tell her "Why didn't you get your own when you could"
You know what I would do? I would simply respect her wishes and be there for her as much as possible. I bet you she feels the pressure and is even more frustrated with it because aside from popping out a kid tomorrow, what can she do to quiet her family?
She needs someone on her side right now...she needs her sister. It seems like you really care for her and love her...just hold her hand and make sure you are there when she reaches out for you.
May be she likes Sex to much and she doesn't want a break.
Women have their sexual peaks in there 30s.
So leave her alone.
When is old and wrinkled and come to see your kids(cuz she don't have her own ), Then you tell her "Why didn't you get your own when you could"
yh naz.. jst support her nd respect her decision.. maybe she duznt wnt 2 tel u jst yet b'czo she thinks dt maybe ur lyk every1 else n will start tellin her 2 had kidz.. show he ur support n dn maybe if der is a problem she'll discuss it wid u
bt its ryt.. its her lyf so let her do wt she wnts.. n tell ur family 2 stop buggin her.. ive gt an aunty hu's bin married 10yearz n duznt av ne kidz.. she wnts 2 sumtymz bt i guess it up to Allah wen she's gna av em
speak 2 ur mum n tell her dt der a lot of ppl hu dnt av kidz until many yearz l8r.. n sum dnt eva av em,.. if Allah wnts her 2 av em ryt nw dn she will.
naz, as other have said already, its her choice,
and if there are infertility issues, whether with her or her husband maybe she does not want to advertise it and then that be the gossip fodder for the 'concerned' rishtaay daar.
she seems like a mature person, so trust her to make the right decisions.
as far as the 'concerned' family members, you should start asking them about their family stuff, and then see them shut up..
like "auntie, your daughter and her husband were fighting a lot at the last family wedding, is everything okay now? are he seeking counselling"
but beware, realize that 'concerned' citizens can ask any questions because they are concerned, yet if you ask, you may be branded badtameez, either way its shuts them up
Quite possibly, the dumbest post ever. Your sister is probably being prompted by some hidden biological instinct, not to procreate and further spread the stupidity that runs in your gene pool. It was painful to read this post, abbreviation is one thing but what the hell is 'wiv"!
Quite possibly, the dumbest post ever. Your sister is probably being prompted by some hidden biological instinct, not to procreate and further spread the stupidity that runs in your gene pool. It was painful to read this post, abbreviation is one thing but what the hell is 'wiv"!
Wow, I am speechless! Apparently you havent been here long enough if you think this is "the dumbest post ever".
