Any out there?
Like, living in the dorms while going to school or just living by themselves as a choice?
i think bharyshi is referring to someone actually living on their on, not in as in dorming on campus.
bharyshi, there aren't many that i know of :) for some, its difficult to even reside on campus.
I am living all alone by my self I got this little studio for me. It will be my first time living alone. Otherwise always lived with my parents and with my abusive husband to whom i recently left.
[This message has been edited by Farhina (edited July 11, 2001).]
I used to, not anymore though!
When I first came to USA, I shared an apt w/ anothr foreign student. And so t/ pattern continued w/ sometimes 1, 2,or even 3 roomies plus myself. We were always trying to increase t/ # of our roomies to scrimp and save, trust me, when yur a foreign student, u- think of anything and evrything
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Come graduation time, I’d just about had it, so I got an apt. and enjoyed it alllllllll by myself. I am really very freakyyy about my bathroom being clean, which wasn’t possible w/ roomies ugghhhh
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but hey, you become flexible!!
Looking back, it was a different kind of an xperience, one that I wud recommend to every male/female. T/ stuff you learn abt yurself can be totally amazing. In my opinion everyone should live on thr own after school and before marriage. Initially you get really bored being by yurself, but then you learn not leave t/ house, or pick up t/ phone everytime you are bored. You actually start enjoying your own company!
Why do you ask Bharysh?? Thinking about venturing out on yur own for a while??
I can relate to most of the story of Funky baji.
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If Bharysh is referring to living alone by yourself then I think it must have been difficult for typical desis be it girls or boys. I myself found it difficult for 3 months when my cousin was away. There are some girls who are very westernized and they live separately from everyone but what I have seen is that they are involved in drinking, boy friends, and even eating pork and stuff.
bharysh .. you know i'm not one of 'em.
but the ones whom i know of who r on their own .. arrrggggh the lucky bums r having a blast.
Wait wait... bharysh, exactly what do you want to know from them?
I doubt it if they'll raise their finger and say 'Present!' as a response .. you know?
Khanjii quote: There are some girls who are very westernized and they live separately from everyone but what I have seen is that they are involved in drinking, boy friends, and even eating pork and stuff.
Khanjii, I know some of these girls and geuss what?? They live w/ thr families in Pakistan!!
My point here is that it all depends on you, that's why I said it's better to move after school, so one is (hopefully) mature and knows t/ difference b/w right and wrong, good and bad! Trust me one does not need to be away from thr family to do any of those, specially in t/ West. You can find xamples of such girls and guys even back home in Pakistan as well as out here in t/ West. It depends on how you have been raised and what your perspective on life is, that is, if one has that to begin with!
By t/ way, where is Bharysh?? Sawaal pooch kar khood gaib ho gae!
I am living alone and not into drink, boys or drugs. I am very relgious and strong will power girl. I know its diffucult we all need to over come our fears.
This cousin of mine, she lives in Philadelphia. Her mum and brother live in a little town near Philadelphia, so she gets to see them quite often, but basically she is living on her own. And mashallah, she is very religious as well.
But I'd have to agree with khan_sahib, that in many cases people tend to get involved in bad behaviour and stuff. That's not only limitited to Girls or Pakistanis, but it's a general phenomena which is seen quite often among newly "independent" people.
And I also agree with FunkyDesi, that in the end it all depends on how you were raised as a kid and which values you have been given by your parents.
Umer, the Pakistani Brain of Austria
Let's not forget guys are more involved in drinking and fooling around, but Pakistani parents don't think 2wice about "not" sending thr sons to Umreeka or Englaand, but oh Lord, just even mention that you're daughter wants to abroad for studies and evrybody gives you those weird loox! Hypocrites!
Nobody ever asks how and why their son is living away from home and I know what kind of lifestyle they have! Phuuleeeeze! They fool around like hell in t/ West, and then expect Mommy to go look for an 18 yr old virgin! Jerks.
It's more common for guys to move out after school in order to get themselves established and financially secure. But while they are on their own they have a chance to learn a lot more about themselves than they would have at home.
Desi girls, especially muslim girls, don't necessarily get the same opportunity. They end up not knowing a lot about adult life, especially when it comes to doing taxes or handling finances, because they are kept in the shelter of their homes. They don't really learn about themselves and personal interests, because of household chores or restricions placed upon them.
I think females endure a lot, because typically they leave their parents home to live with their husband and possible reside with his family as well.
btw- sorry for my delay in responding, my computer is wacky aj kal.
Well I know alot of Muslim desi girls living alone but most of them belong to very broad minded families. And when they usually find good careers in big cities they usually move there.
And most of them are good girls and usually are "aware" that they belong to Muslim families when they lead an independent life.
Yesterday I met three girls around here. I had known them for a while. But yesterday I found all three of the girls came to the US for studies alone. All three of these girls are really shareef yet very friendly. And they have there priorities set right.
to whoomever that said that guys come over to
the west to be laid and to screw with the immoralities
nature has set as a trap
I say good day to you cuz you are wrong
i don’t know bout the fobs who make it here
but sure as heck… totally raised in a western
society… i know my limits… I am
religious and virtuous
hard to believe (gasps by the Paks in Paki land)
and that stereotype has to be corrected
that Westerners have no sense of morality
or decency
they are very liberal
the fact of the matter is… that… the environmental
factors and the parent socialization are
tremendous on the future vices and virtues of
their child
no matter which society you live in… if one
is slightly weaker than the other… well guess
what that one overcomes it
so you see my friends… my confusing
yet simply put in a nutshell to the derangment
of mores set by a desi society are perplexly
influenced by many factors
screw girls living independently
screw men living independently
if one does not live responsibly
one grieves tremendously
Poof
My work here is done.
http://www3.pak.org/gupshup/smilies/smile.gif
** Mu Hu Hahahahahaha!**:hoonh:
"Quote the Mu,“NeverMu!”
Ymu2 quote: to whoomever that said that guys come over to
the west to be laid and to screw with the immoralities
nature has set as a trap
I say good day to you cuz you are wrong
i don't know bout the fobs who make it here
but sure as heck... totally raised in a western
society.... i know my limits.... I am
religious and virtuous
hard to believe (gasps by the Paks in Paki land)
and that stereotype has to be corrected
that Westerners have no sense of morality
or decency
they are very liberal
the fact of the matter is... that... the environmental
factors and the parent socialization are
tremendous on the future vices and virtues of
their child
no matter which society you live in.... if one
is slightly weaker than the other... well guess
what that one overcomes it
so you see my friends.... my confusing
yet simply put in a nutshell to the derangment
of mores set by a desi society are perplexly
influenced by many factors
screw girls living independently
screw men living independently
if one does not live responsibly
one grieves tremendously
Poof
My work here is done.
O Bhaii, itnay jazbaati honay kii zaroorat nahi!! If you are not one of those who screw around etc. good for you !! I was talking about guys who come from Pakistan and pretty soon are busy fooling around , and you and I both know there are quite a few such guys out thr. I admit that there are such girls as well, but usually they live as you said, more responsibly.
Like you said, one should live responsibly, period.
Ali Beta:
You sound surprised that girls can come out in t/ West just like guys for eductaion etc. and actually manage to be friendly and "shareef" @ t/ same time!!
I wasn’t trying to be jazbati(whatever that means)
this mechanism was to alert outsiders
that there are people here in the west that
are not totatlly deranged from cultural
principles
** Mu Hu Hahahahahaha!**
"Quote the Mu,“NeverMu!”
Y2mu!
Baat sunno. Dont stereotype! I am sure there are many deranged Muslims around here and there are many good people around here.
No need to get Jazbaati. Jazbaati means emotional.
[quote]
Originally posted by FunkyDesi:
**
Khanjii, I know some of these girls and geuss what?? They live w/ thr families in Pakistan!!
My point here is that it all depends on you, that's why I said it's better to move after school, so one is (hopefully) mature and knows t/ difference b/w right and wrong, good and bad! Trust me one does not need to be away from thr family to do any of those, specially in t/ West. You can find xamples of such girls and guys even back home in Pakistan as well as out here in t/ West. It depends on how you have been raised and what your perspective on life is, that is, if one has that to begin with!
By t/ way, where is Bharysh?? Sawaal pooch kar khood gaib ho gae!**
[/quote]
FunkyDesi baji, I don't understand do u mean that there are people who are into pork and stuff in pakistan. Although, I agree that it depends on your upbringing, I must say that living ALONE has some draw backs as the society, especially in the west, has some effect on you and the chances are high that you can go into bad habits as we are not perfect and certainly not prophets.
Farhina, I think I didn't generalise the situation and said "some girls" and even boys
I had never sterotyped… tell me one line
In fact, I posted my reply to downgrade
stereotypes… never used it
i said not to use it…
read the reply again
Thank you
Come again!
http://www3.pak.org/gupshup/smilies/hoonh.gif
** Mu Hu Hahahahahaha!**:hoonh:
"Quote the Mu,“NeverMu!”