Sibling relationships in your culture.

[shaasavera]

Re: Sibling relationships in your culture.

@the_kaur

In my religions, even people of same gothra are brothers and sisters :)

interesting...zara aur bataye :)

[shaasavera]

Re: Sibling relationships in your culture.

@LP

Ofcourse, his mun boley sons live in another country / city.

Acha. That is good in a way he has rishtedaar in all cities :)

[KKF]

Re: Sibling relationships in your culture.

@Aaze

I'm aware of the fact that cousins are na-mehrams, just like a bhabhi is to her devar. I don't believe my sentence should be taken the way you're trying to paint it, but I should probably had clairified that I meant in my feelings for them vs my brothers, there is no difference. I treat them with the same respect and love.

oh ok...i got it.

btw, Bhabhi is NOT naa-meHram as long as she is married to your brother same was as bahnoi is not naa-maHram as long as your sister is married to him because two real sisters can not be married to the same man at the same time.

[muqawwee123]

Re: Sibling relationships in your culture.

@shaasavera

interesting...zara aur bataye :)

extended brotherhood.

In Muslims: Muslaman sab aapas main bhai bhai hain... Behn sirf saggi behn hai. munh bola rishtas has no value. You can marry cousins

In Hinduism : You can't marry first cousins

In Sikhism : You can't marry in same caste / surname (gothra)

[Aaze]

Re: Sibling relationships in your culture.

@KKF

oh ok...i got it.

btw, Bhabhi is NOT naa-meHram as long as she is married to your brother same was as bahnoi is not naa-maHram as long as your sister is married to him because two real sisters can not be married to the same man at the same time.

She might not be eligible to marry her devar/behnoi as long as her siblinga are in the picture but she still has to do her pardah in front of them.

[KKF]

Re: Sibling relationships in your culture.

@shaasavera

Maybe they are not like brother and sisters but if she is not intending to marry the cousin brothers, then what is harm in calling them brothers? Why is it going against teachings? Aren't we all brothers and sisters..and apart from person you marry you shouldn't think of anyone else in such way.

no one knows the future...what makes you so certain that you will never end up marrying that person? events, circumstances, change of heart may some day force you to marry that person.

besides, in Islam i was talking about, meHrams [whom you can NOT marry in any circumstances] are few [like father, sisters, brothers, uncles, aunts etc] while the rest of the population is naa-maHram [meaning you can marry them] ... cousins are naa-maHrams in Islam.

[KKF]

Re: Sibling relationships in your culture.

@Aaze

She might not be eligible to marry her devar/behnoi as long as her siblinga are in the picture but she still has to do her pardah in front of them.

what do you mean by purdah? burq’a or modest dressing?

no, no pardah except modest dressing and modest behaviour is required. a saali can come in front of his bahnoi without burq’a/purdah…can even live in the same house.

yeh hamaaraa cultural moHaavarah hai k “saali aadhi ghar waali”… … it got nothing to do with Islam.

[shaasavera]

Re: Sibling relationships in your culture.

@KKF

no one knows the future...what makes you so certain that you will never end up marrying that person? events, circumstances, change of heart may some day force you to marry that person.

besides, in Islam i was talking about, meHrams [whom you can NOT marry in any circumstances] are few [like father, sisters, brothers, uncles, aunts etc] while the rest of the population is naa-maHram [meaning you can marry them] ... cousins are naa-maHrams in Islam.

I guess you can just tell whether someone is potential or not. Once someone makes up their mind they usually don't change. Aur shaadi mein force ki baat nahi honi chaiye. Aise kaunsa situation ho sakta hai jo force karein.

[shaasavera]

Re: Sibling relationships in your culture.

@muqawwee123

extended brotherhood.

In Muslims: Muslaman sab aapas main bhai bhai hain... Behn sirf saggi behn hai. munh bola rishtas has no value. You can marry cousins

In Hinduism : You can't marry first cousins

In Sikhism : You can't marry in same caste / surname (gothra)

I've heard of first cousin marriages in hinduism and sikhism but im not sure. Kaur will know better.
I agree in Islam cousin and munh bole rishte are not same as real brother /sister. KKF bhi aise keh rahe the. Munh bole rishte basically only have value if someone puts value on them but it's not really valid.

[Aaze]

Re: Sibling relationships in your culture.

@KKF

what do you mean by purdah? burq’a or modest dressing?

no, no pardah except modest dressing and modest behaviour is required. a saali can come in front of his bahnoi without burq’a/purdah…can even live in the same house.

yeh hamaaraa cultural moHaavarah hai k “saali aadhi ghar waali”… … it got nothing to do with Islam.

A difference of believe I guess

[muqawwee123]

Re: Sibling relationships in your culture.

@shaasavera

I’ve heard of first cousin marriages in hinduism and sikhism but im not sure. Kaur will know better.
I agree in Islam cousin and munh bole rishte are not same as real brother /sister. KKF bhi aise keh rahe the. Munh bole rishte basically only have value if someone puts value on them but it’s not really valid.

I think marrying first cousins is not allowed in Hinduism / Sikhism. May be there are some exceptional sects

[shaasavera]

Re: Sibling relationships in your culture.

@muqawwee123

I think marrying first cousins is not allowed in Hinduism / Sikhism. May be there are some exceptional sects

I guess generally now it’s not allowed but i think there have been historical exceptions. I don’t think there is law banning it. It’s just cultural practice.

[muqawwee123]

Re: Sibling relationships in your culture.

@KKF

what do you mean by purdah? burq’a or modest dressing?

no, no pardah except modest dressing and modest behaviour is required. a saali can come in front of his bahnoi without burq’a/purdah…can even live in the same house.

yeh hamaaraa cultural moHaavarah hai k “saali aadhi ghar waali”… … it got nothing to do with Islam.

I think there is some hadees which put an emphasis on purdah from Jeth / devar.

عن عقبة بن عامر أن رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم قال: إياكم والدخول على النساء. فقال رجل من الأنصار: يا رسول الله أفرأيت الحمو؟ قال: الحمو الموت.
رواه البخارى ومسلم

Sayyidinah Uqba b. Amir reported Rasulullah (sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam) stated: Beware of getting into the houses and meeting women (in seclusion). A person from the Ansar inquired: (Oh) Rasulullah (sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam), what about husband’s brother, (what can you inform me regarding him, what should our relationship be like towards each other,) whereupon Rasulullah (sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam) said: The husband’s brother is like death

[muqawwee123]

Re: Sibling relationships in your culture.

@shaasavera

I guess generally now it's not allowed but i think there have been historical exceptions. I don't think there is law banning it. It's just cultural practice.

I think this is something like blasphemy and people committing this will meet death penalty

[KKF]

Re: Sibling relationships in your culture.

@shaasavera

I guess you can just tell whether someone is potential or not. Once someone makes up their mind they usually don’t change. Aur shaadi mein force ki baat nahi honi chaiye. Aise kaunsa situation ho sakta hai jo force karein.

in our culture, there are hundreds of situations where one may be forced by their humanity, circumstances, situations to marry someone whom they would have not married otherwise. ‘forced’ doesn’t mean ‘physical’…emotional blackmailing by parents is one such force.

Bollywood meN dikhaate haiN na k manDap meN dulhaa jahez kii maang kar baiThtaa hai, laRkii kaa baap use vo qeemtii jahez nahiiN de paataa…baap majboor ho kar dulhe ke baap ke qadmoN meN apnii pagRii rakh detaa hai jise vo apnii Thokar se maar kar door phaiNk detaa hai…baap ko heart attack ho jaataa hai aur laRkii bilak bilak ke baap se lipaT jaatii hai to vahaN uskaa muNh bolaa bhai bhii hotaa hai jiskaa dil paseej jaataa hai aur vo dulhe ke sar se uskaa sehraa cheen ke apne sar par rakh kar vo manDap meN baiTh kar shaadii kar letaa hai…happy ending!

[KKF]

Re: Sibling relationships in your culture.

@muqawwee123

I think there is some hadees which put an emphasis on purdah from Jeth / devar.

عن عقبة بن عامر أن رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم قال: إياكم والدخول على النساء. فقال رجل من الأنصار: يا رسول الله أفرأيت الحمو؟ قال: الحمو الموت. رواه البخارى ومسلم

Sayyidinah Uqba b. Amir reported Rasulullah (sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam) stated: Beware of getting into the houses and meeting women (in seclusion). A person from the Ansar inquired: (Oh) Rasulullah (sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam), what about husband’s brother, (what can you inform me regarding him, what should our relationship be like towards each other,) whereupon Rasulullah (sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam) said: The husband’s brother is like death

yeah, here you are talking about being in seclusion...no one says that it's ok...even a father before entering his home must knock so that daughters in the house may not be surprised and caught without proper head covering etc.

normal interaction in a household setup is allowed. a bahnoi can be ghar jawaayiiN but both saalis and the bahnoi have to avoid unusual situation where shaitaanii temptations can overcome...

...isii liye kahte haiN k "tanhaaii meN ek mard aur ek aurat ke beech teesraa shaitaan hotaa hai".

[mahool]

Re: Sibling relationships in your culture.

@KKF

what do you mean by purdah? burq’a or modest dressing?

no, no pardah except modest dressing and modest behaviour is required. a saali can come in front of his bahnoi without burq’a/purdah…can even live in the same house.

yeh hamaaraa cultural moHaavarah hai k “saali aadhi ghar waali”… … it got nothing to do with Islam.

@muqawwee123

I think there is some hadees which put an emphasis on purdah from Jeth / devar.

عن عقبة بن عامر أن رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم قال: إياكم والدخول على النساء. فقال رجل من الأنصار: يا رسول الله أفرأيت الحمو؟ قال: الحمو الموت.
رواه البخارى ومسلم

Sayyidinah Uqba b. Amir reported Rasulullah (sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam) stated: Beware of getting into the houses and meeting women (in seclusion). A person from the Ansar inquired: (Oh) Rasulullah (sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam), what about husband’s brother, (what can you inform me regarding him, what should our relationship be like towards each other,) whereupon Rasulullah (sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam) said: The husband’s brother is like death

Bhabhi aur Devar ka rishta moot ka sa hia…

[Sweetmoi]

Re: Sibling relationships in your culture.

@Aaze

I come from a very close knit big family and yes I call my cousins my brothers and sisters because that’s what they are. I’m extremely close to them and we’ve spend a lot of time together as children and adults even when we lived in different countries. Our parents have made great effort to make sure we got to see each other regularly. Basically family is important to me and that’s how I’ve grown up. Adult problems or politics have never effected the relationship between us cousins. That’s also how I want to raise my children and as far it’s working fine, my kids are close to their cousins and inshallah it will stay that way ..

ameen with u as their mum it cant be any other Way. love](http://www.paklinks.com/gs/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=Love) and respect](http://www.paklinks.com/gs/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=respect) .

@KKF

oh ok…i got it.

btw, Bhabhi is NOT naa-meHram as long as she is married to your brother same was as bahnoi is not naa-maHram as long as your sister is married to him because two real sisters can not be married to the same man at the same time.

Here we go again lol.

[KKF]

Re: Sibling relationships in your culture.

@Sweetmoi

Here we go again lol.

lolz...no, i ain't going any further...i said what i had to say! :)

[Microbian]

@KKF:10094384

lolz…no, i ain’t going any further…i said what i had to say!

But who told you there is no pardah between dewar bhabi?