Should I or shouldn't I?

All very true. But it takes at least a year to get a new appartment. The victory will be of the harrassers if they manage to bully us away. I want to live here, happily despite of the things they try. I’ve noticed how they hate it when my children and me are happy.

Yes, it’s not nice for children to be harrassed, I have experienced that myself as a child. Only when I was 16 I had more friends, it was the first time in a school that nobody insulted me for my shalwar kamiez and I even got many friends there. I didn’t want my own children to have the same problems, so I had bought western clothes for them to fit in. I want my children to have friends and a nice life. But what use is it, when the neighbourhood is negative?

I could move away right now to my parents home. But then it would take one or two years to get a new appartment. And I don’t have energy anymore to buy everything again and to do everything again. I had just finished my appartment in Apeldoorn when I left there, it didn’t solve my problems. I regretted afterwards for leaving that appartment. I don’t want to make the same mistake. Inside my home, we’re happy. When we go somewhere, we’re happy. It’s only here in my own neighbourhood that my son can’t even go buy something without being beaten up by those kids, like last Saturday. It’s only here in my own neighbourhood that my son gets harrassed when he wants to play in the playground or in our street.

So he can have a life outside our neighbourhood. This Saturday his life outside our neighbourhood is starting. Those kids hate it when we remain calm and happy and ignore them. That’s the best thing to do .

And the police should do something about it too, since the parents of those children aren’t doing anything. I could go to social services for help, but I wonder if they will help me, even believe me. I have a contact person there, who told me I could always ask his help in case of trouble. But would he believe me? I hesitated. Maybe I should try to talk to them as well.

I can’t do anything more about it. I’m going to take your advice though and try to talk to social services about it. I don’t think they will do something about it though, if they even believe it is questionable. When I told people those two women beat me in my own home, I wasn’t believed either. Those kids were afterwards laughing at my children, ‘haha, your mother was beaten up, how did she like it?’ things like that. But when I tried to seriously talk about it, I wasn’t believed by many people. So then I wonder if I really could do something.

If I move away, it’s not just having to take all our belongings to another place and having to paint another appartment, it’s also going to be the happiness and victory of the people who have been harrassing us in this negative neighbourhood. I’m not giving them the happiness of harrassing me away, I made that mistake when I was in Apeldoorn, I’m not making that mistake again. Also they won’t get the happiness of getting me angry or sad.

I’m not staying here for the rest of my life though. I’m going to find a new home. But calmly. Not immediately, that would only make those harrassers happy. I’m calmly staying here. I’m going to teach my son to treat those kids like dirt on our shoes by ignoring them. I did however tell him to fight back when they start hitting him. He has my permission, to fight back when they really hit him, kick him. But he shouldn’t fight anymore if they push him, that doesn’t really hurt and until now, whenever he pushed back or hit back, even at school a few times, the teachers believed the other kid who had started and my son got the blame for starting a fight, while the other kids had begun pushing him. So I advice my son to ignore those beasts, and only if they really beat him or kick, to fight back. It’s difficult though for him.