I dont think I should.
A while back I posted that I had been invited to the wedding of a close relative.
They never invite us for Eid, when they invite all my siblings and other relatives and they never invited us to the nikkah which was this weekend and invited evryone else I know.
Does that sound like they want me there? I think not. They just want my wedding gift/money.
So Ive decided not to go as I dont like going to places where I’m not wanted.
Am I overreacting?
Re: should I go?
I think you should go, or maybe even frankly ask them...what is the problem. I think this really sends strong message that they do not like you. Or maybe sometimes they want to cut guests that are unwanted...yet have to be invited for courtesy sake.
You need to see where you fit in with this family.
Re: should I go?
umm dont go cos if they r close relatives they should have invited to u eids and also he nikah and tell them that u really felt hurt by this
Re: should I go?
think this way that its the moment of their happiness and u want to fully share the joy with them, this way they wont say or have excuse later that u didn't show up at their time of happeness. May be there might be some misunderstanding, which is normal in desi realtives.. go to the wedding like its ur own family's weddin and give love, respect, present, this way u look good and im sure god will be happy too... when u do good thing from ur heart it always turns out to be good.. her kisi kay khushi or ghum ka sath do, dont ignore... waqt ka kuch nahi pata in future where u stand...
Re: should I go?
if you look at it in a really selfish kind of way, you DO need to provide a gift but you get a nice night out, you and your guest dress up and have a lovely evening and a nice meal...the price is simply the cost of the gift that you give.
Should you go? Well, do you want to have a nice evening out? Most people do (or at least those of us who dont have to worry abt babysitters and all that).
The question of whether or not they really really WANT you to be there should not be the deciding factor here...the deciding factor is whether or not you want to participate in something that may (or may not!) be a fun social event for you. Weddings are just notorious for getting all kinds of people together. Not YOUR prob as to what they were thinking when they sent you an invite.
Re: should I go?
^ You definitely should go.
Re: should I go?
Go and just give them really small amt of money. Usually on the wedding, money is handed to the bride (at least on teh valima), it's ont like she'll sit there and count it.. later on, when she's counting it, she'll never know who teh cheapo was :p
Btw, i'm kinda joking..
Re: should I go?
U should GO...and meet wid them very nicely..!!!
thats gonna make them feel a bit embarassed as they left u out on previous occasssions!
Re: should I go?
I strongly agreed with Zainab's comments. You should go and meet with them soooooo nicely like you never met them before :) seriously, if they have sharm-o-haya, they will automaticaly feel very embarassed of not inviting you on other occasions, look the best on this wedding and be cheerful!!!!!!!!!!!!
hope this helps......
Re: should I go?
I think if they invited you, you should go..otherwise don't. Someone above said to confront them polietly..i think thats not a very wise idea...why go into details if that really is that case.
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I wouldnt go alone, but I would if I had someone/family to go with.
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why would they need your money or gift anyways?
thats kinda low thinking.. in my humble opinion
Re: should I go?
Go like a besharam, don't take a gift, and enjoy their hospitality.
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DO they intentionally not invite you on other occasions? Or do they not specifically call you and expect you to be included in a general invitation to the family?
Re: should I go?
amen
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I can understand why ur feeling apprehensive abt it esp if u didnt get an invite to the other functions. It depends on how close u r to them or whether u can b asked to go. Would u get a lot of grief if u didnt go?
Re: should I go?
well you should not go.i have met a lot of people like that too,my motto is JAISAI KO TAISAA means ,if they dont want u dont go there,i usually do that:) atleast u are safe from these dual persanalaties ppl.Mooh pai achaai aur peeachai sai ALLAH tobah…
LAALCHI LooG:naraz:
Re: should I go?
Okay. Thanks for the replys evry1.
First of all this isnt the first time they've done this on a wedding. And I didn't go the last time.
I know for a fact that my being there and sharing their happiness wont make the slightest bit of diff to them. They have shown that by not inviting me to the nikkah and I'm sure they all had a great time and no-one missed me.
No point telling them that they hurt me cos they dont care.
It wouldn't really be a nice day outfor me cos I always end up being really bored. The last time I ended up sitting on my own for ages. Apart from that there wont even be any music which will make it even more boring. And also I dont feel comfortable being in a place where I dont feel wanted I dont like to inflict myself on others.
I have too much self respect to go where I'm not wanted.
No matter how nicely I meet with them they wont feel embarrassed or apologetic I'm sure of that.
They intentionally dont invite us. I'ts nothing new.
I'm still in 2 minds about it cos there is still another occasion that takes place before the wedding. The night before. If they invite me to that then I might need to rethink. I was thinking of turning up just for about an hour and then leave and say I've got other plans. Ive told the kids we might go ice-skating on that day.
But if they dont invite me to the night before then that will totally make up my mind for me.
I was kinda thinking I might just put a card through their door with money in it.
Re: should I go?
^ Err in that case don't go. And why teh hell would you give them any of your hard-earned money if they're so callous adn greedy???
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Well some family members don't consider giving a formal invite to people from their family.. as i've witnessed but yeah if they haven't acknowledged you or anything like that... Forget it!!
Since I have a huge ego, theres no way I would go considering they sent out invites to everyone and left me out.