Re: Should I feel insecure?
Busy Bee,
I agree with Reha. Your husband is very lucky that he has found a wife as loving and supportive as you that you have been silently suffering for his sake. You don’t have to suffer silently. That is not what God intended for any human being. Regardless of whether your husband is uninformed of his Islamic duty to you & his family or unable to stand up to his family, the buck stops with him. But sometimes, the men are not prepared to do what they must do so you’ll have to teach him slowly (without being overbearing). And he is very lucky to have a wife who will help correct him of such a mistake that may weigh heavily on Judgement Day.
According to Islam, every person has a role. Your husband needs to learn his role and responsibilities as a husband, his role & limits as a son. Doing right by you will in no way take anything away from his mother. Every person and every thing has a proper place. Every person has a role, a wife, a mother, a husband and a son. The husband/son is the enforcer of these roles. Like someone has stated previously, the MIL temper tantrums, are occurring because not only are those tantrums being tolerated, but they are being rewarded. She gets exactly what she wants. Your husband is an enabler of this behavior. If your husband doesn’t put an end to cruel behavior from his parents to you, he becomes an accomplice to their cruelty.
I know you are frustrated and are most likely at your wits ends, but yelling at your husband or emotionally stating that your rights are being trampled on will not help you obtain your rights. If you want to try to change things in this family, it will require strategic action. If you’re not ready to throw in the towel and run as far away from this circus, I’d be happy to share my two cents. Bringing a baby into this mess is the last thing you need to do.