Should I feel insecure?

BusyBee · March 28, 2013, 11:14pm

Re: Should I feel insecure?

Oh dear, I didn’t mean to be insensitive or hurtful in anyway. Sometimes when we lack the love and attention from our spouses, attention and understanding from others can be healing (albeit a temporary relief).

Sounds like your hubby is a good guy but is stuck in the vicious cycle of his selfish parents who have pulled out quotes from Quran out of context to justify their behavior. Your in-laws are clearly wrong. And your poor husband is stuck in the middle without the understanding that it is his duty to stand up to his parents and obligation to you as your husband.

Yes, do Istikhaara.

The reason your in-laws live with you for 10 months of the year even though they “LOVE” the other DIL is because they get served hand and foot. I would suggest a break from this situation. Get away from this stress for a short period (a month or more) and let them all see how they get along without you. During this time, really focus on strengthening yourself. People talk about our responsibility to others but fail to emphasize the responsibility that we have to our own selves & God. God has asked us to take care of our own bodies and to not over burden them, and to rest when we are tired. So take a break, rest, find yourself, and find God. When we obsess about anything whether it’s the in-laws or our jobs or other people, we are removing God from the center of our lives and replacing these other people and effectively making them “our God”. God is the source of all peace so turn to God not only physically (like most of us do in prayer) but also with your spirit/heart. I have found personally that the balance, peace, and love that we all seek is found only with God. Sorry to sound so preachy but I myself have come to that conclusion after so much struggling and am hoping to prevent more suferring on your end.

Ok, I understood that. Thanks for your advice. I’m currently doing istikhaara and will go with the flow iA. Thank you again for your positive response. I really appreciate that.