So one of my very good friend had this guy and his family come over for her Rishta last night. This was totally arranged, she was seeing the guy for the first time. I was way more excited than she was. I couldn’t wait to hear the details, so the minute the family left she called me to tell me the full story. Everything went pretty well, but one question which left her traumatized was one of the question he had asked. This is exactly how she told me…
X: noori, tu yaqeen nahi karrey ghey Y nai mere sai kiya poocha?
I : Kiya ?
X : guess tu karo!
I : draamay na karo orr batio
X : noor who kehta hain…… (complete silence)
I : KYA ( Bakko bhi, I’m dying to know here)
X : Kehta hain kya aap Virgin hain.
I : (hahaha) Kya. tumhara damage theek hain who yeh kyun poochey gha, purr tumh nai kiya kaha?
X : kehna kiya tha mere tu samjh main hey kuch nahi ayya bus Surr hilla diya kai hoon.
Even though I still think she is lying, but do you actually think he could have asked her that. I’m sure they were given full privacy to get to know each other. But that does not mean you ask a girl if she is a virgin or not. And would you even ask this question on your first meet? Have these type of questions become part of our whole arranged marriage method. Should these questions be asked? What’s next? You got kids?
Ok, so there are a lot more girls going throug this. I have had a friend who was asked this question too by her very own first cousin. She just declined the proposal right there. I mean is that due to the lack of trust from the guy's part or what! In my friends case it was a quite unexpected deal indeed since they both knew one another for quite a long time.
I think this is a pretty damn rude question to ask some one.
but if a man ask you next time answer this in politest voice ever:
" i have heard that in aincient Rome girls only get married to lose their virginity " (hidden meaning if he can understand)" so that they can do any thing they like after that and their husband will never know"
if the boy still cant understand say wot??
then come to desi style
"how would you feel if your sister tells you that her supposed to be husband asked her this question"
but you can find out the intellectual level of that person as soon this question will come out.
I think Boys and parents in desi culture really needs to grow up cos its just not right.
I was peculiarly amazed at her masoomiyat…
Could be that he wanted to know if she loved anyone and he just used wrong expression? Some morons may do this as well?
even asking so rude question, the poor guys still didnt get the right answer! then whats the purpose of asking these kind of questions.
or atleast he should have asked in otherway like asking about any relationships etc etc.
one question to all girls though,
expacting a virgin?? is it something wrong with it? specially if the guy is same masoom(not many though) and i think a shareef larka who hasnt been invloved in such acts and just waiting for marriage deep down he must be excpecting the same thing from his potential partner.
hmm since i am not aware of the backdrop of the situation i think i am not in the state to comment on it, but during my last visit to pak, though i did manage to visit some old friends and well to me they seemed more westernized then the european or americans, so if that’s the case then i think their is no harm in asking such questions. but generally speaking as a whole i dont think majority of guys ask girls such questions, well it’s understood i guess, but the ways things are now moving ah well. i think it’s bad
I've only heard of one instance over here where a guy asked a girl during their second phone conversation whether she was a virgin or not. He wanted to know cause 1. he was; and 2. his previous fiance wasn't ... and although she was his dream girl, he had to end it with her cause of this. Can we say insecure?
But seriously, what's wrong with the guy in Lahore asking the prospective spouse if she is a virgin or not. Knowing this may be his only chance to make a decision, he has every right to ask personal questions. May be it's a show stopper for him. I just don't see why are you all getting so pumped up against him. He has certain expectations from his future wife and this is one of them.
I am not saying it is right or wrong to expect a virgin or it should even be an issue.
( Bakko bhi, I’m dying to know here)
