huh, story is so long, roaming around 5-6 years back, don’t know if really i can explain my issue properly or not. Anyway, here it goes: I madly love a girl back in my college days, that was not my crush, for sure she was my love. I even composed poetries for her, went mad after seeing her for a sec… (long list of all those emotional love thingy)
well during my graduation, her parents engaged her with someone, which i couldn’t stop due to my position. When i realized i can’t live happily without her, i keep asking her if her engagement be ended which she clearly said her parents would never do it as they like him and his family so much. As i was in pain, i used to pray like this that Plz God either make her mine or give me strengths to forget her. So i start ignoring her for good, didn’t contact her for long time and she too did same. Just 4 months before her marriage, her engagement suddenly ended due to an incident.
Now i am again in contact with her, start from counseling her that i will be with you whole life no matter what consequences would be faced. But what actually disturbs me: i have lost feeling which once i had for her. May be coz of our break up, may be coz of my prayers. I still like her but i have lost all those charm and happiness i used to feel with her. She says ur lv was true that is why what u wanted became reality, i’m with u. Now I have no courage how to tell her that i have lost my feelings and we should move on and separate our ways…
I am sorry for long post… i need some practical advices. Should i stay with her or move on? don’t wanna lost her on one hand, while have lost my feelings for her.
Re: She was the one, i love a lot, but not anymore…
oh…this reminds me of a shair i have read which is just so apt for this situation!
it went somethin like…tujhe paane k talash mein is qadr kho gaya hun k agar mil gaey tu afsoos hoga .
PCG should read this. this is a case of being mad after something you know you can’t get but when you are about to get it, it just looses its charm for you.
Re: She was the one, i love a lot, but not anymore...
Yeh waqti mohabbat hai. And probably the one that was exciting jab usko haasil karnay ki chahat thi. Now that you "have" her, it's anticlimactic. And that my friend is real life.
Re: She was the one, i love a lot, but not anymore...
maybe you have just grown mature n r nt affected by how many smses you get by her or how many times she calls u? but ofcourse not caring at all cnt mean you still love her.
Re: She was the one, i love a lot, but not anymore...
Yeh waqti mohabbat hai. And probably the one that was exciting jab usko haasil karnay ki chahat thi. Now that you "have" her, it's anticlimactic. And that my friend is real life.
hmm shayd, religiously believe tha khud ki muhabbat pe but i am sure now my lv was not true
Re: She was the one, i love a lot, but not anymore...
well better to lose your pheelings now than 12 years later with a 4 yr old baby and a lot of mooncake with lard. go out and eat a steak. sms her a dumpin you text.
Re: She was the one, i love a lot, but not anymore...
maybe you have just grown mature n r nt affected by how many smses you get by her or how many times she calls u? but ofcourse not caring at all cnt mean you still love her.
:)
mere shakal pe 12 bajy hoye thy but now i am literally smiling at the facts u mentioned...
Re: She was the one, i love a lot, but not anymore...
Look, if you don't have ANY romantic feelings for this girl......then you need to STOP making mushy comments like "I'll be with you till the crack of doom no matter what consequences take place" because that's only going to confuse/mislead her. I personally think it's hard to maintain strictly a friendship with your ex because it hinders the moving-on process......but if that's what you want....then be careful with your words.
You can try to take a break from her....(let her know) and use that time apart to figure out your feelings for her. OR...if you're absolutely certain that you don't have any romantic feelings for her, then you need to be direct/honest with her. Tell her that while you were apart from her your romantic feelings for her diminished and that you don't see her in the same way anymore...and that your feelings for her are that of a friendship than a romantic relationship.
You also need to understand that you can't have everything your way. You ARE going to lose something in the process. That SOMETHING will be the dynamics of the relationship.....they're going to change because you don't see her in the same light anymore. As a result...she may try to distance herself from you and she has every right to do so. She may not want to continue talking to you with the same intensity/frequency as she did before because she fears that she'll get emotionally attached to you and that will prevent her from considering future rishtas. It'll be like a trap for her. So, by telling her that you're not in love with her....be prepared for the change that will come in the relationship ....and understand her need to distance herself and respect her wishes. She can't put her life on hold for you...she needs to move forward as well.
Re: She was the one, i love a lot, but not anymore...
well better to lose your pheelings now than 12 years later with a 4 yr old baby and a lot of mooncake with lard. go out and eat a steak. sms her a dumpin you text.
right right right that is what i am thinking that problem may arise after our marriage, well i need to be stone hearted to leave her alone
Re: She was the one, i love a lot, but not anymore...
well better to lose your pheelings now than 12 years later with a 4 yr old baby and a lot of mooncake with lard. go out and eat a steak. sms her a dumpin you text.
What he said. If you can't do it for yourselves, do it for those poor kiddies.
.