Time and again I’ve noticed many on Gupshup desire to get married to a female with a clean slate. Someone who has never been in any relationships in the past, someone who has never done, seen, or heard anything bad/inappropriate, and whatever else there is that fits the category of shareef-tareen larki.
I understand there’s nothing wrong with wanting someone with the best possible past and character, but what bothers me is many who desire such wives are quite often the ones going around on GS sharing what inappropriate material they watch, or how they completely love the way such and such actress (or another female) looks, and even boast about their past, which may not have been the perfect one.
Many have gone to the extent of stating they’d like to go back and look for someone better in Pakistan (even stating specific regions) or doing whatever it takes to marry someone with a clean slate.
In fact, it’s not just on GS, but I’m familiar with many other desi guys offline who desire the same and haven’t exactly been angels themselves.
My friend whos Iraqi...born and brought up here...slept around...blazed a bit of weed, drinking , clubbing the works...is getting married to some virgin girl from his parents hometwon lol...
He likes the idea that she is untouched...and that is a nice feeling i suppose...knowing that a girl has only been with you...and she has no history other than you...
To me though i reckon its a bit deeper than that...theres a possibility that theyve had a bad experience like being cheated on...a girl made them feel insecure...she didnt listen...or a girl continuously compared them etc...the guy may have been around the block but it doesnt mean it was all plain sailing...
The virgin girl represents the safe option...a girl with no experience...no preconceptions...someone who can be moulded and will be easy to satisfy...
Those are the pros but just remember its them taking the easy option...
Those guys are hypocrites Sadiyah. They will get what they deserve, htey might get a virgin girl from Pakistan, but she might turn out to be an ugly backbiting two faced *****. you never know. I think u shud just have faith..good men will go for good women, regardless of where the live or done in the past, and bad men will end up with bad women.
o man luk yeah u cant realy say tat good guys get gud guls n bad gets bad well tats how it should be 2 a certain level but iv known so many perfect marriages or u cud call them relationships broken away jus like tat i mean back home in Pakistan der be couples where women r jus bovered about their husband inside the house not wat he does outside n to them bain in the reltion means everything n tats called true love for their man by those women n u cant call it ignorance cus it aint.
Look Sara you said that bad guys would get bad girls and that aint true because in real life I've seen situations where people change when they get good people in their lifes. And it aint that justice on those bad people for getting bad girls because they might have got influenced by the surroundings. Do you get it I mean its abit harsh to call a guy whose been doing bad stuff and now he wants to live the rest of life with a good and clean girl which could turn him into a good guy as well.
The meaning of clean state may vary from one guy to another. How much are you willing to keep it clean? Give yourself a break..worry about yourself and your future instead of how the other idiot may perceive you.
Sara & Fayz, this has absolutely nothing to do with me. The only reason I brought it up is because I see so many individuals having double standards, which I find bothersome.
If guys expect a clean virgin girl.....they should remain a clean virgin guy themselves....otherwise they're just being hypocritical.
at the end of the day...matches are made in heaven.....and im sure Allah will do justice with everyone....by making sure they end up having a partner that they deserve :)
^^ I find myself in total agreement with you . pakistani male community is hypocritical when it comes to finding a girl for marriage ( no offence) and most of us do have double standards ...
Ab aisi baat bhi nahi hai Sadiyah, Bohat sarey Larkey bhi tu shareef hotey hian .. ab apney hi muhalley main merey aik jan’ney waley sahab hain, junaid wayeen. panj waqt ke namazi, muhalli ki saari ourtain unki izzat kartee hain balkey kuch ko tu wo bazar bhi le jatey hian, dupatta ranganey, kanari lagwaney waghera … bachey unko mamoon kehtey hain …
Ab bhala batao, itni sharafat ke bawajood unki shadi nahi hoyee, unki umar ki larkeyaan ab auntyaan ban chuki hian
And are those bad guys,who have 'repented' and want to begin anew,willing to give the same chance to a girl that might have erred in past,and wants to live a good and clean life?
Another question,why is that,that the bad guys,whether or not they have repented...expect to get married to a 'clean' girl.But mostly,no such choice is available to women.
Somehow,it doesn't seem fair to me that a person(regardless if it is a girl/guy)who has lived a good and virtuous life,should be married to someone who's not that shareef.Sadly enough,life is mostly unjust.
All I have to say to this thread is, I was listening to the translation of Surah Al-Nur and in it clearly states, " Pure men are for pure women and pure women are for pure men. So, if any psychotic who has slept with everything in it's life and wants to marry a virgin well Allah has better plans for you buddy:)
Who gives a damn if a man-whore wants to marry a virgin? Poor women want to marry rich men. Girls with no degrees want to marry doctors. Girls with no jobs want to marry men with careers. The list goes on and on.
Not so sure about that. There are so many mismatches around that one would think twice about the above, shareef ghareloo type girls married to sharaabi kababis, seedhay saaday type of guys married to cunning girls, I don’t believe all matches are made in heaven.
