Hiya Shikra,
** well i most certainly do not agree that parents are to blame.**
i understand that there is a gap between parents and children (ok most of em and esp in desis) when it comes to the topic sex.
its even hard for em to talk abt periods, mostly the schools eduacate kids in this and else they find out thru friends/ tv or when they go thru it;)
anyway a parent has got a hard enuff job as it is and so many responsibilities. one may question then kay wo bachay kyun lete hain if they cannot take responsibilities. but its justtoo easy to blame the parents for everything. esp when stuff goes wrond its either our parents our else the Almaighty that didnt look after us or properly.
and if parents forbid certain things whats a kid gonna do? exactly disobey! coz what is that thing we are not allowed to do? it must be something great! (kids think) or they'll be choking of all the rules and then just do whateva they want and end up i a way they carry heavy consequenses.
i guess its just too easy to blame the parents or society etc etc.
there comes a time in a persons life that you are responsible for what happens to you and you should carry the consequenses. if u are old/ mature enuff to make ur decisoun to have sex then you are old enuff to carry the consequenses.
am i being too harsh? i dont think so.
i think we are all responsible for own actions.
if you can breath, eat, drink, sleep, walk, think for yourself then you most certainly are responsible for all u do.
anyway schools and governments should make more effort in talking bout such issues and schools should also let the parents know when and what they teach kids about sex etc.
I agree with most of your post but would like to comment on the bold statements and the statements in red.
In my previous post, I did not say that we should conveniently throw all the blame on the parents. What I asked was that do you think that the parents are somewhat responsible for irresponsible actions of children.
The statements in red contradict each other. In the first statement, you are admitting that their is a gap between children and parents and children find out about menstrual cycles and sex from friends, media, school, or by going through it themselves (for the most part)........and then instead of suggesting that parents should change the way they deal with kids, you are suggesting that the government and schools should put more effort into it and schools should let parents know when and what they teach kids about sex. Well, then what exactly are parents' responsibilities?
A good education and upbringing starts from home. Sure school and government programs can help, but some of the responsibility still falls on the parents.
As for if parents forbid kids from doing something, they will still do it. Again, I agree as I said it in my post as well, but as Niksik said, the kind of relationship that you have with children can make a big difference. If you kids are scared of you, sure they will lie and disobey you, but if you are friendlier with them and they trust you and can talk to you about anything, then I don't think that the children will disobey their parents and do things behind their back.
As for your statement that if one can eat, breathe, sleep and walk etc., then he/she is responsible for his/her own actions. Not entirely true. Teenagers can also think, walk, sleep, and breathe, but that doesn't mean that they are mature enough to make wise decisions. They still need guidance, be it from parents or counselors at school. So you can't hold children entirely responsible for their behavior. Again, that doesn't mean that they are free to do anything, it only means that someone (parents, teachers etc.) should show them the difference between right and wrong when they are young. We all make mistakes, adults make mistakes too, but children make more mistakes as they are still in the process of learning. They can't be let lose so that they can make wrong decisions and put themselves in unwanted situations.