Re: secret second marriage
Sure, something is probably lacking in the marriage, but are we getting into a who is to blame more competition? The cheater or the cheated-on-spouse who did something to push their husband/wife into the arms of another person? And what of those marriages where the husband or wife is a good spouse and the blame can be laid on the loose character of the philandering spouse - some people are not capable of monagamy and you can’t blame the cheated-on husband/wife for the cheating partners character flaw.
Here’s the thing - where the marriage isn’t working for the husband or the wife - then end it!!! Cut ties and thengo out looking for another relationship. There is never going to be an excuse for cheating while remaining in a relationship. While he or she is married, the spouse owe their loyalty and their effort to working on the marriage. If the marriage is unhappy because of the other partner, then either resolve the issues or divorce the partner.
Only after the marriage is over should another relationship be considered. Cheating while married is trying to enjoy the best of both worlds - being a happily married family man/woman and then having the other relationship on the side - the only person whose interests are served are the married partners - not the cheated-on-spouse or the mistress/gigolo.
And for those mistresses or gigolos who pursue married partners - no one is calling them innocent or a victim. They’ve chosen this path for themselves and hopefully karma’s gonna get them in its own way.