The Quran emphasizes the limitations against polygamy in very strong words: "If you fear lest you may not be perfectly equitable in *treating more than one wife, then you shall be content with one." **(4:3) **"You cannot be equitable in a polygamous relationship, no matter* **how hard you try." **(4:129)
The Quranic limitations against polygamy point out the possibility of abusing God's law. Therefore, unless we are absolutely sure that God's law will not be abused, we had better resist our lust and stay away from polygamy. If the circumstances do not dictate polygamy, we had better give our full attention to one wife and one set of children. The children's psychological and social well-being, especially in countries where polygamy is prohibited, almost invariably dictate monogamy. A few basic criteria must be observed in contemplating polygamy:
1. It must alleviate pain and suffering and not cause any pain or suffering.
2. If you have a young family, it is almost certain that polygamy is an abuse.
3. Polygamy to substitute a younger wife is an abuse of God's law (4:19).
the verses do not outlaw polygamy
at any rate i dont expect the first marriage will last long after the second one is known.
I dont have kids so no worries