To some this might be outright silly, but for those married (ladies), please give insight -
I am getting married in less than 2 months and I am absolutely scared. My fear is of none other than leaving my parents and home. I know every girls gotta go through this but with each passing day im getting more and more nervous to the point that I come to tears just thinking of it! My fiance is very supportive and understanding and so is his family, but I dont think any guy can truly understand the feeling a girl has about this. Its really bitter-sweet for me. My main concern is that nearing into the wedding I will dread it to the point it consumes me (if it already doesnt!) and not even enjoy my wedding.
I know it is only a transition period, but how did you deal with the separation anxiety? (Not to mention I will be relocating to another state!)
Anyone feel me? Or am i just going crazy? Any words of adivice?
i can understand wat ur saying,as iv got 3 months to go till my wedding..my mums gone to pak n im missing her like anything...i literally cry over the fone..n shes only there for 5 days!!but i think its something u have to deal with no matter wat..
n to be honest im absolutely scared of going into a new family,i know ther nice ppl but still!!so any help on that..
my aapi (who got married last year) celebrated eid-ul-adha for the first time without us… mom called them to wish them happy eid but aapi won’t come on the phone she kept crying sad face
And mom thought someone had said something to her my BIL got in trouble … Mom “interviewed” him over the phone and he was like “kuch bhi nahin hua, she’s just missing you guys” … Only after aapi came on the fone and talked to her, was she satisfied.
She’s doing well now, just like every other girl settles down a few months after the wedding, so will u. Congrats and best of luck :k:
no one can make u feel better … cuz its just one of those things that are totally led by heart and situation
just take every day as it comes and dont think too much.. spend as much time as u can with ure fokls and loved ones… inshallah all will be well
other than thinking bout missing my folks.. one of my worst fears was.. how will i ask for food at my in laws or just go into their kitchen and take stuff.. haha… now that i look back.. its soo funny and silly.. my mom woudl laff when i would cry over it before the wedding haha
I know every other girl goes through this, but when it comes down on YOU then it when it really hits! I am fortunate to be mixed into their family already and know my in laws, but still, even if youre married into the familiy you are still leaving your parents and your nest.
I do need to take it day by day. It is just constantly on my mind, i cant find myself happy or focused about any of the little things girls get so excited about for their wedding (I was like that until now! :()
LOL are you serious!? I am positive that if i had the power to do so with my wedding i would be doing the same, lol! What are you scared of? Share your fear...
Yeh it has been postponed a record 3 times now. I am serious lol. Man I am a complicated homo sapient if I go in to my fears etc it would take ages to write everything. Basic thing is, I am just scared. Maybe commitment? Maybe leaving home and going to some new strange place and making it feel like home? etc etc etc.
Omg, you have found yourself a similar homosapien then! I know my parents will be fine, they will have my bro his wife and their son at home, but for me, im just packing my bags and gone! My suitcases are sitting in the gameroom and I pass by them multiple times in a day and it just reminds me over and over and over...and scares me over and over and over =/ Sigh, then you see perfectly normal girls who probably didnt even think of half of the things im fearing. I guess you said it, i really dont know what exactly im afraid of, im just scared, maybe the adjusting? For god sake, i would never spend the night at a friends house growing up bc i cant sleep anywhere other than my bed. What will i do now. Im doomed. lol
LOL same here, I have my own particular way of sleeping. My bed, my feather pillows, all darkness around. Pin drop silence. Amongst other things, adjusting is a big fear. Also the fear of MILs lol. I dunno what she will be like, right now seems okay. :/
Everyone used to tell me that first year of marriage is usually difficult because it's the phase in which you need to adjust and understand the whole new environment. Undoubtedly it's not easy to leave that place where you have been living since many years but it takes time, don't just rely on your partner's support, you will have to put your own efforts to adjust because no matter what only you can deal with your feelings better than anyone.
I suggest you to enjoy your time and wedding. I also used to have so many fears before marriage and I really feel that I could enjoy my wedding preps/ wedding day very well but I didn't just because of these fears :(
talk about wedding jitters.i ve had posst natal ones ,when iwas at my mom after having my firsr kid I spent a month at my mom,after I got home I cried and cried because I had a really good time back home it was just like old days,the funny thing is my mom lives in the next street and I get to see her almost everday.
i totally understand. in fact i was sooo angry at this tradition of marrying girls off as soon as given half a chance, it infuriates me. i cried a lot when i got married, when i moved house. but you get used to it. in fact now its weird cos mum doenst like me coming home withuot husband, she thinks i should always come with him....how mums change....
I totally understand what you're going through! I started freaking out like 5 months before I got married. I would start crying and be really really sad. I can tell you from experience that you will get over it and you will get used to your new home and family. Now when I go over to my parents house I miss my bedroom and bathroom and I can't wait to get home (my new home).
Every girl goes through it. The first two nights were hard for me but then I got used to it. One piece of advice I have is that it makes it a million times easier if you are working b/c you're so busy that you don't have time to think about missing home. I still love being my old home and that's where I feel most comfortable, but I've gotten so used to my new life that I don't get homesick anymore. No matter how understanding a hubby is, he will never understand. Whenever I would get homesick my hubby would think I didn't like living with him and his family lol.
Just yesterday i was thinking i love being a girl, until considering this situation! Ahh! I think what makes it worse is because im the baby of my family and im a big time mama's girl. Hes the oldest child in his family. He comforts me, but at a point like this i blame him for being so evil that hes taking me away from my fam just to be with him, lol.
Im just going to have some big time adjusting to do. I already told him to not to expect the best of me bc im probably not gonna do so well during my transition period :| God knows how long thats gonna last!
Spoiled males! They dont know how good they have it!
To some this might be outright silly, but for those married (ladies), please give insight -
I am getting married in less than 2 months and I am absolutely scared. My fear is of none other than leaving my parents and home. I know every girls gotta go through this but with each passing day im getting more and more nervous to the point that I come to tears just thinking of it! My fiance is very supportive and understanding and so is his family, but I dont think any guy can truly understand the feeling a girl has about this. Its really bitter-sweet for me. My main concern is that nearing into the wedding I will dread it to the point it consumes me (if it already doesnt!) and not even enjoy my wedding.
I know it is only a transition period, but how did you deal with the separation anxiety? (Not to mention I will be relocating to another state!)
Anyone feel me? Or am i just going crazy? Any words of adivice?
well to be honest, normally husbands and sasso maan... don't like anything about Bahooo.. at all.. some time they probably even wanna cut you in half.. ..
remember those stories in the newspapers.. like gas cylinder explosion ... cutting the leg or hand of wife... .. etc..etc..
all happens my advise is .. wherever they tell you.. just sit.. just don't stand up even if its 10 hours....
I’ve got four months to go and I am absolutely shaking in my boots because of the shaadi. I am the last one in my family and he is also the eldest so I totally understand where you’re concerns are coming from.
I mean just the other day he said his mum might leave us and go to Pakistan for a couple of months so I might need to help out in the kitchen and I was like “say whaaaaaaa..?” I’ve never had to do that because I’ve always been the baby and had people look out for me. So now, I told my mum to give me all the responsibility of the kitchen so I won’t look like a fool when it comes to after shaadi time mum agreed
I, as you, also worry about who will look after my parents but their faith in Allah is so strong it humbles me and I know Allah will be their true protector. Ameen.
Don’t worry! Have faith in Allah and your fiance, respect him and his family and InshAllah all will be fine! Also, don’t go into shaadi with any kind of expectations whatsoever. You’ll only be disappointed and argue about it with your hubby. Just sit back, relax and enjoy the ride
my BIL got in trouble … Mom “interviewed” him over the phone and he was like “kuch bhi nahin hua, she’s just missing you guys” … Only after aapi came on the fone and talked to her, was she satisfied.
haha
mum agreed 
