Re: Same name
i know a very old couple my classfelows dada dadi boths name were khursheed and there used to be a tradition in some villages that childhood engagemnts were common and weneevr a grl is born she is engaged to a boy her name sometimes ended up being similar to the guys name.there was a family used to live in our neibhour and uncles name was shareef ans antys name was shareefan.i thnk its no big deal at all
Re: Same name
Imagine a friend of the guy comes to his home and says this in front of his wife… “Yar Rifat tumhari shirt bari pasand ayi mujhay, aik do din ke liye udhaar de do”… and the guy looks at his wife and wife looks at him! hawwwwwww haye!
On a serious note,
OP if it bothers her that much then look somewhere else unless she likes younger brother more and is using the name thing to kick out Rifat Bhai… I mean the elder one!
Re: Same name
^ I can understand that Farhat and Sabahat are examples of unisex names. I have 2 male cousins of those names and I have come across females with the same names too. But…Riffat? Seriously? Riffat and Iffat and Nighat and Nuzhat all sound so feminine…that they just sound so wrong on a dude. 
Please tell me that Riffat is never used for men. 
shudder And him borrowing a shirt sounds off too.
Re: Same name
Most families do not like to switch one sibling for the other for rishta. Most cases I know of where it happened, families have out right rejected if one family asked for rishta of younger or older one, instead of originally intended person. If thats what you like to know.
Personally, I think its inappropriate, however, it has happened in some cases.
This.
I have been in a situation where the other party tried switching over to my sibling when the original proposal being considered was for me. I was really turned off by that and my family refused the proposal altogether. When they saw that happening, they tried switching back, but I didn't want to be someone's second choice.
Now I do know of the rare families where it isn't seen as a big deal (because it is completely arranged and for whatever reasons, good rishtas are limited). So who knows, it could very well work out for your friend too. I personally find it disrespectful. The only time where I think it is acceptable is if let's say you really like a family and are interested in their eldest child but upon inquiry, it turns out that person is already unofficially engaged. Then if you switch to the next child in line, it should be okay because you are not the one rejecting someone over superficial reasons. And there haven't been any direct talks between the girl and the guy in question.
Re: Same name
Dr. Rifat Hussain, he is the brother of known Pakistani journalist Talat Hussain. And I have friend whose elder brothers are Rahat, Azmat and Rifat 
Re: Same name
:(
Do some parents hate their kids or what? Why give your kid a problematic name?
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:(
Do some parents hate their kids or what? Why give your kid a problematic name?
These are nothing, kids are named Toofan Khan, Sharbat Gul, Mohabbat Khan, Khasta Gul in KPK and tribal regions.
Re: Same name
This.
I have been in a situation where the other party tried switching over to my sibling when the original proposal being considered was for me. I was really turned off by that and my family refused the proposal altogether. When they saw that happening, they tried switching back, but I didn't want to be someone's second choice.
Now I do know of the rare families where it isn't seen as a big deal (because it is completely arranged and for whatever reasons, good rishtas are limited). So who knows, it could very well work out for your friend too. I personally find it disrespectful. The only time where I think it is acceptable is if let's say you really like a family and are interested in their eldest child but upon inquiry, it turns out that person is already unofficially engaged. Then if you switch to the next child in line, it should be okay because you are not the one rejecting someone over superficial reasons. And there haven't been any direct talks between the girl and the guy in question.
I guess the reason why someone is rejected for a sibling is relevant. I'm not sure what reason they gave but sure it must be upsetting in some circumstances.
I know two sisters where the younger was much prettier so it happened that people asked for her all the time even though parents were really looking for elder one or in one case they met and then chose the younger one and the parents went along with it because they liked the guy a lot. I think that's harsh. Whereas in this case I think there's a more legitimate reason. Neither of the two feel comfortable with it because of this unfortunate coincidence with their names. It's not you're not good enough for me because of any personal reason. I do think people are being too sensitive about the rejection. Surely people get rejected all the time because they are not suitable for various reasons. Sometimes people turn down a rishta after looking at a pic! If someone turns you down for an inoffensive reason it shouldn't be that upsetting.
Re: Same name
^ I can understand that Farhat and Sabahat are examples of unisex names..
Is Mubeen a unisex name? Recently came across a guy whose name is Mubeen. It was weird.
Also, Farah and Irum.
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^ i still don't understand if the guy is also uncomfortable why he can't suggest the girl to his parents for his younger brother? why does it have to be the girl's parents making the suggestion so it comes off as if she is rejecting the elder brother? if they both mutually agree that its weird to have the same name, then it should come from both of them to suggest the younger brother (if the younger brother is an option). i'm sure she can find out about the younger bro through the older one and see if he is even interested.
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^ i still don't understand if the guy is also uncomfortable why he can't suggest the girl to his parents for his younger brother? why does it have to be the girl's parents making the suggestion so it comes off as if she is rejecting the elder brother? if they both mutually agree that its weird to have the same name, then it should come from both of them to suggest the younger brother (if the younger brother is an option). i'm sure she can find out about the younger bro through the older one and see if he is even interested.
girl and boy are not in touch. They spoke for a few mins at fanily gathering... No exchange of telephone nos, email etc
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^ why didn't they exchange anything? because they both discussed that it wouldn't
"work" for them having the same name?
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Bottom line is that it should come from the guys side if there is an option for the other brother...not the girls family.
Personally, I'd be more weirded out by seeing someone whose rishta had previously come (in this case the brother in law) on a continual basis rather then be married to someone with the same first name.
But that's just me.
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Is Mubeen a unisex name? Recently came across a guy whose name is Mubeen. It was weird.
Also, Farah and Irum.
I would find it weirder if a girl was named Mobeen. I have only encountered guys with that name.
Re: Same name
I would find it weirder if a girl was named Mobeen. I have only encountered guys with that name.
same here lol
Re: Same name
I would find it weirder if a girl was named Mobeen. I have only encountered guys with that name.
haha really? My aunt's name is mubeen :/
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haha really? My aunt's name is mubeen :/
My friend's brother is named Mobeen. But before that there was a guy named Mobeen in my junior high school. It may be used for both genders, but I suspect it's most often used for males.
Re: Same name
Hmm I am surprised that people don't think it's strange.
It's not about them calling each other by name. I agree people can have pet names etc.
Imagine introducing yourself to people: 'Hi my name is Sabah and this is my husband Sabah'
Or when your families or friends are talking about you... which Sabah do you mean (male or female?)
In fact this happened at their meeting where someone said ' Do you want some tea Sabah?' and the female replied even though question was really addressed to the male one.
Yeah it's not the end of the world, I agree, but I do think it is going to be very odd to have the same name!
Its not that the same names are strange, it's that it would be a potential dealbreaker for an otherwise good rishta that's absolutely maddingly STRANGE.
Wouldn't it be weird to have the same name as your jeth?
I know many Aishas and Sanas but it's never been weird.
and finally how do you even have the nerve to think its OK to reject him but want his brother? Marriage isn't a grocery store that you can pick and choose the produce. Pathetic desis man.
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Did no one know the names before this rishta process began? I know many couples with the same or similar names. No big deal. If it is an issue for the people invloved than a simple no thank you will do, do not drag this on and complicate matters.
Re: Same name
Desi world problems?